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Edd

From Chewiki Archive - YouChew: 1% Funny, 99% Hot Gas

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Name: Edd(ward) Marion ██████
Appears In: Ed, Edd n' Eddy
Sex: Male
Age: 12
Occupation(s): Eddy's other slave friend, inventor, pedophile
Played By: Samuel Vincent

CharNice.jpg This article is filed under Characters.
Edd is quite worried what the hell is going on in his father's garage.

Eddward Marion ██████, Edd for short (AKA Double D. We're not talking about the breast size or the character, Dee Dee) is the second member of the gang group, The Three Eds. He is the brains of the group. He usually wears a sock-like hat for no reason. What's under his hat remains to be known. He is in no relation to Ed and Eddy. His favourite word is 'No.'

Cultural Heritage: Polish-American

Trivia[edit]

  • It is rumored that Edd is related to Bison's Arse.
  • Edd is one of the few people who are actually aware that Toasters....toast BREAD, not toast.
  • Despite his puny stature, Edd is capable of making VERY loud noises.
  • Was rumored to be gay, but this was disproven after he was seen eating out Haruhi. (This was accompanied by some very VERY loud noises)
    • However, this was shown he was only doing this to revive the ones who commited suicide.
  • Owns a volcano. (Though it is defunct for a few years.)
  • Was once a male-stripper, where he would go as far as getting himself entirely naked. Bart Simpson is jealous of him because of that.
  • He often has sex with Ludwig von Koopa on Sundays and when drunk.
  • Kissed Eddy while he was high.
  • He once engaged in public nudity after getting high and complaining about the outside temperature.
  • According to Jonny, he's GOT A CARD.
  • He is not related to the smartest man ever, Julius Sumner Miller.
Edd finally tells Ed and Eddy something that he should've said to them a long, long time ago.

Quotes[edit]

  • "Toast doesn't go in a toaster, bread does."
  • "FATHER'S GARAAAAAAAGE!"
  • "I think I'm sitting on a nail."
  • "Oh, wait my leg's cocked!"
  • "THE BUBONIC PLAGUE! I'm The Bubonic Plague!!"
  • "NO! Not plaque, plague! PLAGUE!!!"
  • "JOOOONNNNNYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!"
  • "I'm a little acorn, and when I grow up, I want to be A TREE! Acorn becomes A TREE! Acorn becomes TREE! Acorn, TREE!"
  • "That's disturbing..." (Him after finding out that Ed's parents took down his stairs to his kitchen because he's grounded and/or seeing hentai.)
  • "Oh, I feel it! I FEEL THE ADRENALINE BABY!!!!!!!!" (Double D having an orgasm.)
  • "We could very well be on the cover of the next Intellectual Discoveries Magazine!"
  • "Good Lord!"
  • "I CAN'T BREATHE!"
  • "It's called a sextant."


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Inventions Edd Made[edit]

Edd is famous for making many inventions. They are all illegal in Florida, Texas, Maine, New York, Rhode Island, Pennsylvania, Spain, Norway, Canada, Egypt, China, Japan, The United Kingdom and The Moon.

  • Super-Suckin-Vacuum-Volcano (Accidentally destroyed by Eddy.)
  • Super-Jumpin-Boots (Injured over 400 people in Spain.)
  • Metal Mama Luigi (Destroyed by the real Mama Luigi.)
  • Metal Mama Luigi 2.0 (Destroyed in a freak gardening accident.)
  • iPoop (Edd was sued by Steve Jobs for stealing his idea.)
  • The Never Ending Bottle of Mountain Dew (A.K.A., NEBOMD) (Edd was sued by Homestar Runner because he drank too much of it and had to have three stomach transplants. Was also sued by PepsiCo for copyright infringement.)
  • Metal Mama Luigi 3.0 (Destroyed by his Metal Mama Luigi 4.0.)
  • Metal Mama Luigi 4.0 (Destroyed by his Metal Mama Luigi 3.0.)
  • Oiram Izan (Set fire to houses in Florida, Texas, Maine, New York, and Rhode Island.)
  • Neo Mama Luigi (Killed over three-thousand people in Norway during a Dethklok performance. Destroyed by Dethklok themselves.)
  • Nega-Godzilla (Half-destroyed Japan and China. Died due to AIDS.)
  • Ultra Metal Mama Luigi
  • Rock TV (with help from King Koopa and Wizardheimer)
  • Clone of Jimi Hendrix (The only thing that isn't Uctions Edd made that isn't a threat to the world.)
  • Unicron
  • /B/lackup Machine (Destroyed half of Peach Creek and created Desu Jimmy, /b/-Johnny & /b/-Plank.)
  • Tickle Me Emo (Turned little 5 year olds into emos and made everyone cut themselves.)
  • Porygon (Gave seizures to Over 9000 people in Japan. Died after Mario Head sued and destroyed it.)
  • Uctions
  • Anti-Uctions
  • You
  • The Pokewalker (an effort to make fat kids get some exercise)
  • A Dick Sucking Machine (destroyed when one of Slippy Toad's ejaculating dildos was jammed into it.)
  • Another Dick Sucking Machine (Was mounted on a VW Beetle and turned in to a racing vehicle.)
  • Your mother.
  • Melonade
  • Metal Haruhi (killed by real You)
  • Metal Prince John (Killed by Robin Hood, sued by Maid Marian, and arrested by King Richard.)
  • The Xbox 360 and the Wii U.
  • The VCR.
  • The first hydrogen bomb.
  • The 3dfx Voodoo Graphics card.
  • The bagel and the toaster.
  • Many of Apple's products, including the Newton.