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Pickle Surprise
What Is It? (Huh?)
Pickle Surprise is a Satanic Ritual that's so evil, even Satan himself doesn't like it. It involves some transvestites with some bad hygeine who met Osama Bin Laden in the '80s. He's there to teach them how to make some sandwich thing that, ironically doesn't have the pickle in it at all. Pickle Surprise is probably the only thing weirder than Youtube Poop, but we can put and end to such blasphemy! AND YOU GOTTA HELP US! IF YOU NEED INSTRUCTIONS ON HOW TO MAKE YOUTUBE POOP WEIRDER THAN PICKLE SUPRISE, USE PICKLE SUPRISE IN YOUR POOP TODAY!!!
How To Partake In The Ritual
- Take an english muffin.
- Spread sandwich spread.
- Plop the Ham thusly please.
- Go into a trance of ham.
- ?????
- Profit!
By the way, that's the surprise!!!
Sightings of Pickle Surprise
Sightings of Pickle Surprise are rare, due to shortages in the kind of opium required for the ritual. However, Steve Erwin managed to capture this rare account of Pickle Surprise when he was looking for wild animals:
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If you ever come across one of these, remember: They're more afraid of you than you are of Satan.
If you take impure Magic Drugs (pure MDs won't do this), you might see Pickle Surprise, or some other nightmarish hell.
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Warning: What you are about to see is an example of what would happen if anyone did a Youtube Poop of Pickle Suprise. If you have any problems such as constipations, loss of semen, nausea, Explosive diahrea, implosive diahrea, loss of water, sudden Gay fantasies, an exposure of (bad) magic drugs, sudden urges to write fanfics, heart palpitations, or insomnia, please don't watch this. Otherwise, please enjoy this fucked up journey for your mind.
Reactions By Those Who Watched Pickle Surprise
- The Angry Video Game Nerd: "What the fuck am I watching?" *After watching it some more.* "What in the Holy Mother of Fuck were they fucking thinking?!?!?!"
- The Nostalgia Critic: "You! Are!! Scum!!!"
- The Tourettes Guy: "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HOLY SHIT!!! THIS IS BULLSHIT!! PISS!"
- The Irate Gamer: "What a bunch of fucking assburgers with french fries and a milkshake on top!"
- Aran Ryan: "RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
- Soulja Boy: "She Got A DONK!"
- Dethklok: "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
- Shaq: "I don't give a shit!"
- Disco Kid: "Fantastic!"
- Super Macho Man: "Release this bogus! RELEASE THIS MOTHERFUCKING BOGUS-US-US-US-US-US*crying*!!!"
- Linkara: "Crap in heaven, how much longer is this?! I HAET THIS VIDEO!! I HAET IT!!! ANTI-LIFE JUSTIFIES MY HATE!!! ANTI-LIFE JUSTIFIES MY HA-A-A-A-A-ATE*crying*!!!!!!!"
- Yoshi: "Waaaaaah?! (Translation: What the fuck is this?!)"
- Dry Bones "*Screech*! (Translation: It Burns!)"
- Bowser Jr.: "Excellent..."
- Rod Blagojevich: I've watched this fucking thing and it's fucking golden!"
- ThatDudeInTheSuede: "GAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!! I am unclean!!!"
- Billy Mays: "HI, BILLY MAYS HERE FOR SUICIDE PUTTY! THE EASY WAY TO KILL YOURSELF. SIMPLY KNEED TO ACTIVATE, APPLY, & DIE!!! *Uses it to kill himself.*"
- M. Bison:"This isn't delicious!" *After watching it some more.* "No! NO!!!"
- Captain Guile: "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
- Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo: "What the hell is this shit?" (It really says something about how weird it is.)
- The Rabbids: "DAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
- Big Bill Hell's Cars: "Fuck You Pickle Surprise! You're such as a stupid motherfucker, you can SHOVE IT UP YOUR UGLY ASS!! Guaranteed!"
- Big Cheese: "Ohohoho KO~ON!" (He enjoys it greatly.)
- Edd: "FATHER'S GARAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
- Fox McCloud: "What the fuck, Star Wolf?" (After being shown Pickle Surprise by Wolf O'Donnell.)
- Falco Lombardi: "Fox, he's gay."
- Wolf O'Donnell: "Oh, and you two haven't had any gay experiances yourselves?"
- Falco Lombardi: "Fox, he's gay."
- Sean Fausz: "That, um..., that just happened. And, um, ya no I'd really like to know.. 'Who Let Andy Dick Put His Weiner In The Pickle Jar?! Jesus Christ, I keep telling people that Andy Dick is a Disease, yet no one listens to the fat guy. Do you see what he's created?! A giant green cock.. thing that keeps screaming Pickle Surprise! Now I don't even know about what the hell this is anymore- looking at the rest of it, I'm not sure if it's about a condiment or food or anything. I think it just may be about pre-op trannies. And tha-that-that blonde thing. What is with her?! What.. Ugh! 'Where's the pickle?' It's in your Goddamned skirt, you.. piece of... geodeh-!!!" (Starts crying in the shower with his clothes on while Céline Dion's "My Heart Will Go On" plays.)