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Dark Star

From Chewiki Archive - YouChew: 1% Funny, 99% Hot Gas
Object.jpg This article is about an object that frequently appears in Youtube Poop.


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The Dark Star and it's mysterious glow.

The Dark Amethyst Star or called the Dark Star for short is a evil star that everyone wants to find. You have to find it before it finds you.


Origin[edit]

The Dark Star was first found by Adolf Hitler to try to kill the jewish people. While it had dark super energy powers, Hitler was not aware of this. When he died, the star rolled into the Atlantic Ocean. It must've been down there for years untill finally, Patrick Star found it. Unfortunatly, the sharp ends poked him and Patrick Star threw it back up into the ocean. See below for more information.

The Battle for the Dark Star[edit]

1999[edit]

  • The Dark Star washed up on the coastlines of Florida, and Gay Luigi, who was living there at the time, found it. The Star glowed and Gay Luigi knew it was powerful, so he picked it up and decided to use it to get rid homophobes or people against gay marriage.
  • Gay Luigi had it for months untill God Luigi, who happened to be studying it, beat him up and stole it from him.

2000[edit]

Now that everyone knew about it now, the problem was getting it to work.

  • God Luigi had it for a year, but Ash Ketchum kicked him in the balls during a match in Super Smash Bros. Ash Ketchum ran off with it.
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    Sonic being taken over by the powers of the dark star.
  • Chris Thorndyke heard that Ash Ketchum found the Dark Star, and confronted him. Instead of fighting him, the two formed a team and spent months trying to figure out how to use the Dark Star.
  • While Chris Thorndyke was sleeping, Sonic saw the star. He thought it would be a good weapon against Dr. Robotnik. So he stole the star quickly. Unfortunatly, like said above, Sonic didn't find it, it found him. Sonic transformed into a black hedgehog.
  • Next, Dr. Robotnik used Sonic as his minion. Also Dr. Robotnik tried to use the star to increase the size of his penis, but instead of making it bigger, it exploded, and Dr. Robotnik screamed: "YOU'RE GOING TO PAY FOR THISSSSSSSSS...!"

2004[edit]

  • The explosion of Dr. Robotnik's penis was pretty intense. It caused the Dark Star to roll out Eggman's house and into Providence, Rhode Island, and Peter Griffin heard about it on the news. He traveled for long distances he finally found it. At the same time, Peter Griffin had to take a shit. And evidently, Peter Griffin must've eaten a lot of burritos.
  • After taking OVER 9000 days in the bathroom, Peter saw that the Dark Star was gone.

2005[edit]

  • Apparently, Providence was having a tornado while Peter Griffin was in the bathroom. The tornado was a F-5 and the strong winds blew the Dark Star down south. It landed in Atlanta, Georgia.
  • Next, Huey Freeman formed a team with Kirby to try and tracking it down. There was no star because Mama Luigi anonymously took it and used a warp pipe to bring it back to Brooklyn.
  • Mama Luigi had it for many months untill he gave up. Mama Luigi consulted Dr. Mario to use his alchemy to change it to a simpler star. Dr. Mario turned on him and stole it for himself.

2007[edit]

  • Dr. Mario managed to hold on to it for a year. His reign ended when Yoshi, dressed up as a patient, and used a needle on him to put him to sleep.
    The Dark Star is also a character in Paper Mario.
  • Yoshi didn't know what to do with it. He ate, but it tasted horrible, so he spat it out in the ocean.
  • Link, who happened to be swimming that day, located the Dark Star. He thought it would help him defeat Ganon.
  • The King and Morshu, dressed as ninjas, assaulted Link and stole the Dark Star. They had intentions of using it to get child pornography.

2008[edit]

  • Morshu and The King managed to hold on to the Dark Star for a whole year. It was finally stolen by Barack Obama.
  • Barack Obama was afraid he might accidentally do something to lose his presidency of the United States.
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Mario under the effects of the Dark Star.
  • It was next stolen by Mario. To be honest, Mario thought it was a regular power star. That is, untill the effects took over him
  • Bowser knew this was a chance to kill Mario, so he swiped the star from him. He harvested it's powers. Untill a bigger force stole it and went into another dimension.
  • The larger force was Count Bleck. Unfortunately, he lost it to Dr. Robotnik.

2009[edit]

  • After a year on thinking about what he'd use it for, Dr. Robotnik decided he would convert it into penis oil, to use on his scabby dick. The problem is, he needed an alchemist to do that, and Dr. Mario already proved himself untrustworthy. So Dr. Robotnik gave it to Oogtar.

The Final Battle (2010)[edit]

This was the most epic battles of Youtube Poop. Mario decided to start a war, known as World War 2.5. All the characters fought for months. Untill it slipped out of Gwonam's hand and fell unto a lava pit that exposed due to the damage.

The Dark Star right now[edit]

The Dark Star can be read about in these titles:

These are the only books made in the whole world. In addition to books, this leftovers of The Battle For The Dark Star can be found in Power Star Museum in San Diego, California.