Kirby

This article is filed under Characters.

Kirby is a cute little pink blob who eats stuff and even gains special powers from eating them. King Dedede hates the little fucker, as does Meta Knight... somewhat.

Creation

Kirby was created by Masahiro Sakurai at the age 19, and was originally planned to be named "Popopo". The original design was actually just a placeholder, but they liked it so much, they kept it. Kirby became a hit, got his own series, with his games getting longer, tougher, rounder and more colourful, and he even starred in his own manga and anime series, Kirby: Right Back At Ya. Also, Kirby was one of the few characters who actually got into Super Smash Bros. Brawl, and is present in all games of the series. The series doesn't really have many characters, just Kirby, Dedede, Meta Knight, Nightmare, Dark Matter, Adeleine the painter, Chef Kawasaki, Whispy Woods, Tiff, Tuff, Dyna Blade, Knuckle Joe, and the Waddle Dees, among others.

Kirby's hearing his usual shit that he likes, like the Insane Clown Posse.

And yet most of those characters made it into Super Smash Bros. Brawl in some form.

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This is what Kirby will be like 20 years from now.

Known Powers

He's the man of many men and faces
He may be pink, but he's really dangerous!
Every enemy he meets is another bad guy for Kirby to eat
Then he takes on their powers
Kirby!

An example of one of Kirby's powers; Fighter Kirby.

• Sword - Slice and dice stuff. It's also enough for him... NOT!
  • Ice sword - Turn your enemies into ice cubes
  • Fire sword - BBQ
  • Thunder sword - Electrocute your enemies
• Beam - Use a beam like a whip. In Kirby Super Star, you can shoot blasts and make beam swirls. A lot better than the regular beam power.
• Spark - Stand still and shock people.
• Plasma (Kirby Super Star only) - Different than the spark power. You can shoot thunder instead of just standing still and shocking. Run back and forth to build charge.
• Throw - throw your enemies!
• Bubble (Kirby Speak Squad only) - If the bubble hits an enemy, they will turn into a bubble showing their power. No no power, then you get a star. Collecting a bunch of stars will let you spit out a super star.
• Smash (Kirby and the Amazing Mirror only) - Good ol' Super Smash Bros. times. You get the hammer, rock, and some enemy-slicing moves.
• Missile (Kirby and the Amazing Mirror only) - Become a missile!
• Cupid (Kirby and the Amazing Mirror and Kirby Squeak Squad) - Become a cupid and kill people with your arrows.
• Hammer - Smash stuff with your hammer.
• Parasol - Float around the place. Seems like a shitty power at first, but what are you going to do about that coconut bomb above you?
• Ninja (KSS, KSqS)- Shuriken, kunai, fire spells (Squeak Squad only), and dropping people from the sky? Oh yes.
• Stone - You're a stone. You can roll over people, but not in Kirby's Adventure.

• Fire/burning (mixed in Squeak Squad) - You can blow fire/turn into a raging fireball.
• Bomb (KSS, KAM) - Boom. You want it?
  • Ice bomb (KSqS) - A freezing explosion.
  • Thunder bomb (KSqS) - A shocking explosion
    • No fire bombs. Regular bombs create fire.
• Tornado - You are a tornado.
• Laser - Light Amplification by Stimulated Emission of Radiation. It ricochets off hills. Can have a bigger charge in Squeak Squad.
• Ice - Blow ice at your enemies.
• Freeze (K'sA) - Become sessile and freeze anyone around you.
• Wheel - Become a wheel and zoom across water! You can pick up elements in Squeak Squad.
• Metal (SqS only) - You're invincible against regular enemies, and you can roll too! But you are very slow.
• Animal (SqS) - Slice the faces off your enemies and give them rabies (not so sure about rabies).
• Master (KAM) - Meta Knight's sword!
• Star rod (K'sA) - A rod... that shoots stars.
• Triple star hammer (SqS) - A hammer with the three elemental abilities fire, ice, and thunder.
• Cutter - Cut stuff with a boomerang slicer.
• Fighter (KAM, KSqS, KSS) - You can fight and shoot hadokens!
• Ghost (KSqS) - Ever wondered how it's like to control your (minor) enemies? No more wondering.
• Crash - Everything on screen dies. 'Nuff said.
• Light (Kirby's Adventure only) - Lights up dark places. Pretty useless.
• Mic (K'sA) - Kill stuff on screen with your horrible singing.
• Hi-jump (K'sA, KSqS)- Jump high(!) for a limited time.
• Needle (K'sA) - You become sessile and poke things that touch you.
• Ball (K'sA) - It's fun to bounce around, but not once you fall down a death zone.
• UFO - You fly around while shooting lasers and beams.
• Tiny (KAM) - You shrunk. You can't suck in things, but you can fit in small spaces.
• Bird (SS) - Fly around and shoot feathers.
• TAC (SS) - Steal powers from enemies from afar. Kind of useless.
• Jet (KSS) - Kirby gets an awesome jetpack.

Super Smash Bros. Powers

• Link - Spam normal arrows.
• Mario - Spam normal orange fireballs.
• Dr. Mario - Spam pills that hurt others.

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• Pichu - Hurt yourself while spamming powerful electricity. Yeah, it's actually pointless for him.
• Pikachu - Spam electricity.
• Princess Peach - Spam Toad
• Captain Olimar - Spam Pikmin... but only when he's on the ground.
• Captain Falcon - Spam the almighty Falcon Punch.
• Kirby - Spam swallowing powers... wait.
• Meta Knight - Spam spinning sword attack.
• Young Link - Spam flaming arrows.
• Mewtwo - Spam shadow balls. You may expand them if you'd like to.
  • Lucario - Spam aura balls. See Mewtwo.
• King Dedede - Spam swallowing and spitting powers... wait, what?
• Toon Link - Spam arrows that go further, yet slower.
• Ike - *shining sound that increases shining sounds* Explode and hurt yourself.
• Marth - *shining sound that increases shining sounds* Slice someone powerfully. Without hurting yourself.
• Roy - *shining sound that increases shining sounds* Slice someone powerfully while hurting him.
• Diddy Kong - Spam a peanut gun that grows in power and accuracy at the right time. However, don't hold it for too long, or else.
• Donkey Kong - Spam great punches.
• Ice Climbers - Spam a single ice thing.
• Mr. Game & Watch - Spam sausages. That's... kinda gay.
• Solid Snake - Spam grenades. Also, grow a really cool beard in the process.
• Luigi - Spam floating green fireballs.
• Samus Aran - Spam a ball of energy. See Mewtwo & Lucario.
  • Zero Suit Samus - Spam a gun that grows energy for some strange reason.
• Fox McCloud - Spam a gun that shoots rapidly.
• Falco Lombardi - Spam a gun that shoots at a somewhat slower pace than Fox's gun.
• Wolf O'Donnell - Spam a gun that shoots much slower than Falco's, yet does extra damage at the tip of the gun. Geez, what's up with his obsession with guns lately?
• Pit - Spams magic arrows. Well at least that's better than yet another gun.
• Zelda - Spam a magic protecting crystal that also does damage.
  • Sheik - Spam spikes.
• Sonic the Hedgehog - Spam Homing Attack.
• Ganondorf - Spam an even more powerful and purple version of the Falcon Punch called the "Warlock Punch".
• Wario - Spam the power of chomping on people. Yes.
• Squirtle - Spam water gun.
  • Ivysaur - Spam bullet seed.
    • Charizard - Spam the flamethrower.
• Bowser - Spam fire breath of death.
• Yoshi - Spam your newly extended tongue... and turn your enemies into eggs.
• R.O.B. - Spam a laser. BEEEP!!
• Jigglypuff - Spam rolling ability.
• Ness - Spam PK Flash.
• Lucas - Spam PK Freeze.

As you can guess, he's a little bit of a spammer at times.

Trivia

• Likes making weird faces near King Dedede.
• Might have a crush on Jigglypuff.
• Defeats the nightmares in dreams from Dream Land.
• King Dedede wants a monster to clobber that damn Kirby.
• Is a terrible singer. (He's so bad that it could actually kill people.)
• Even though most of the things he eats are bigger than he is, Kirby never gets any bigger. (I'm not sure why it's like that though.)
• Kirby has a very wide range of music that he likes. In fact, it's so huge that we at Chewiki were forced to make a template or two or three dedicated to that honor.
• Tiff wants to have sex with him.
• Kirby wears a shirt; where the puck are his nipples?
• Even though bigmarauder ate over forty pizza rolls, Kirby can not only eat those same pizza rolls, but also bigmarauder and the top ten most fattest fucks in the history of the world... and he'd still not be full before dessert.

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Kirby doing yet another one of his special dances.

• Kirby's also a great dancer.
• His favorite food is, believe it or not, blocks.
• Since Kirby is a pink guy, Dan Hibiki approves.
• However, in Kirby's first game, which was Kirby's Dream Land, he was actually white. He didn't become pink until Kirby's Adventure. One theory about why this is: the same concept as flamingos. After the success of his first game, he pigged out on shrimp, which changed his color.
• Shigeru Miyamoto, the creator of Mario, The Legend of Zelda, and many other famous characters, wanted Kirby to be yellow instead of pink. His request was denied because the rest of Nintendo thought that making him yellow would result in copyright issues with Namco and Pac-Man. He eventually got his wish granted in Kirby's Dream Course when if you were Player 2, you'd play as Keeby, who is a yellow version of Kirby and is probably Kirby's twin brother.
• Kirby, along with Meta Knight and King Dedede can be bought as plushies in online stores. They are also very popular toys for people.
• In Kirby Super Star Ultra, Kirby would get a slightly pissed off/serious look whenever he ate something and he didn't get a power. In Kirby's Adventure, he just shrugs.
• Not to be confused with the comic book artist Jack Kirby, or the Kirby vaccums, or Kirby from the Brave Little Toaster, or John J. Kirby, Jr., a.k.a., the lawyer who defended Nintendo against Universal Studios in a copyright attack for Donkey Kong, or; hell; fucking anyone or anything that has the name Kirby in it period.
• Has numerous cities dedicated to him for his awesomeness, such as Kirby, Arizona; Kirby, Texas; and Kirby, West Virginia.
• Kirby is, apparently, a common place name, surname, and given name, derived from Old Norse, meaning church settlement.
• In Kirby & The Amazing Mirror, he has three other types of Kirbies helping him out. The three types of Kirbies are Yellow Kirby, Green Kirby, and Red Kirby.
• He's a jolly fellow. (At least, according to Kirby Super Star.)
• He was once a Street Fighter.
• He's friends with Mr. Sandman. In fact, some might say that Mr. Sandman is his only friend, which is wrong.
• He once got punched like a motherfucker by Linkara when he screamed "ADAMANTIUM RAGE!!!" at him. He got avenged by the Angry Video Game Nerd by punching Linkara in his face when he screamed the same thing at his face.
• Despite the fact that he only cares for food, he enjoyed being kissed by a female fairy, even though he fainted. Our little baby is finally growing up.
• He loves fishing with his best friend, Gooey.
• Kirby's Dream Land 3 shows that there are strange creatures called "Batamon" that look just like Kirby. In addition, Noddy (the little sleepy guy), Meta Knight and Iron Mam (from Kirby Super Star) look like Kirbies, which proves that he's not alone.
• He'll be brave and he'll unite us, then he will die of meningitus.
• He's also one tough cream puff.

Kirby? KIRBY?!

KIRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRBBBBBBBBYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Oh, sorry, Kirby; thought you were a pillow.