Notice: We are aware that many of the Chewiki’s images are still broken. We promise: we will try our best to fix it, but we don't guarantee that the fix will be trivial.

Difference between revisions of "Donkey Kong"

From Chewiki Archive - YouChew: 1% Funny, 99% Hot Gas
 
(38 intermediate revisions by 8 users not shown)
Line 1: Line 1:
 +
{{character}}
 
{{CharBox
 
{{CharBox
 
|name=Donkey Kong
 
|name=Donkey Kong
Line 5: Line 6:
 
|sex=Male
 
|sex=Male
 
|occupation=Protector of Kongo-Bongo and the Crystal Coconut
 
|occupation=Protector of Kongo-Bongo and the Crystal Coconut
|cast=[[Morshu|Richard]] Yearwood/[[Kakashi|Takashi]] [[Ganondorf|Nagasako]]/[[Cody|Kōichi Yamadera]]
+
|cast=Milton "Soupy Sales" Supman/[[Morshu|Richard]] Yearwood/Grant Kirkhope/Takashi [[Ganondorf|Nagasako]]/[[Cody|Kōichi Yamadera]]
}}{{char}}
+
}}
<I>This article talks about the former [[Donkey Kong Jr.]], who is [[no]]w the official Donkey Kong. For the Donkey Kong that was k[[no]]wn as that during [[The Eighties|the 1980's]] (where arcades were at their prime), but is [[no]]w called [[Cranky Kong]], then [[Cranky Kong|click here.]]</I>
 
  
<I>*SPOILER*CONGRATULATIONS!!! At last, [[You|you]][[Gwonam|'ve had the vision to find]] out who the [[Yu-Gi-Oh!|Super Special Secret]] fighter of [[Punch Out!!]] for the [[Nintendo Wii]] was!! [[No]]w, go look at his article with [[Gwonam|many, many blessings.]]*End Spoiler*</I>
+
Donkey Kong is one of the first video game characters to ever appear on a [[Nintendo]] game. He was originally a [[Plaque Monsters|bad guy]], but that was really [[Donkey Kong Country|Cranky Kong]]. He's also the final boss in [[Punch-Out!!]]
  
Donkey Kong is one of the first video game characters to ever appear on a [[Nintendo]] game. He was originally a [[Plaque Monsters|bad guy]], but that was really [[Donkey Kong Country|Cranky Kong]].
+
==In Brief==
 +
He's the leader of the bunch, you know him well. He's finally back to kick some tail. His coconut gun can fire in spurts. If he shoots ya, it's gonna hurt. He's bigger, faster, and stronger too. He's the first member of the DK Crew.
  
===In Brief===
 
 
The Kong now known as Cranky made his debut when he went mad and kidnapped Mario's old prostitute, then tried to murder [[Mario]] with large barrels as he chased after them. The current Donkey Kong is somewhat of a hero, saving the jungle even if he's only motivated by bitches, [[money|cash-money]], and getting back his bananas. And the two other times he was stupid enough to be kidnapped, meaning he did not star in two out of three Donkey Kong Country games, even though he's in the title. Whatever. He was the star again in Donkey Kong 64, along with [[4]] other Kongs. All of these games involve [[King K. Rool]] being the main villain, especially with him doing different things for each of these games.
 
The Kong now known as Cranky made his debut when he went mad and kidnapped Mario's old prostitute, then tried to murder [[Mario]] with large barrels as he chased after them. The current Donkey Kong is somewhat of a hero, saving the jungle even if he's only motivated by bitches, [[money|cash-money]], and getting back his bananas. And the two other times he was stupid enough to be kidnapped, meaning he did not star in two out of three Donkey Kong Country games, even though he's in the title. Whatever. He was the star again in Donkey Kong 64, along with [[4]] other Kongs. All of these games involve [[King K. Rool]] being the main villain, especially with him doing different things for each of these games.
 
{{vid|uSZETPjW25M}}
 
{{vid|uSZETPjW25M}}
 
He has appeared in several (three) other of his own games since the Rare-developed ones. In Jungle Climber he climbs things, and in Jungle Beat he beats up things. See a pattern?
 
He has appeared in several (three) other of his own games since the Rare-developed ones. In Jungle Climber he climbs things, and in Jungle Beat he beats up things. See a pattern?
 +
 +
Be sure not to mess with DK's bananas. That ''really'' rustles his jimmies.
  
 
===His Part In [[Youtube Poop]]===
 
===His Part In [[Youtube Poop]]===
Donkey Kong starred in his own TV series with the same name as his first SNES game, [[Donkey Kong Country]]. This show is commonly used as a source by some, like [[Cortes]] or [[BarnabasB]].
+
Donkey Kong starred in his own TV series with the same name as his first SNES game, [[Donkey Kong Country]]. This show is commonly used as a source by some, like [[Cortes]], [[RideTheCatfish]] or [[BarnabasB]].
  
 
===The Fake DK===
 
===The Fake DK===
Line 26: Line 28:
 
Jr. soon grew up in 1994 with Donkey Kong Country. The original Kong was now old and wrinkly, and is married (though that wasn't found out until DKC2). But what Jr. didn't realize was that [[King K. Rool]], the supposed villain of the trilogy, happens to be in Cranky Kong's ropes. Nobody knew that until some people played the sequel and the sequel after that.
 
Jr. soon grew up in 1994 with Donkey Kong Country. The original Kong was now old and wrinkly, and is married (though that wasn't found out until DKC2). But what Jr. didn't realize was that [[King K. Rool]], the supposed villain of the trilogy, happens to be in Cranky Kong's ropes. Nobody knew that until some people played the sequel and the sequel after that.
 
[[Image:BITEKONG1.png|thumb|Right|Donkey Kong being gang-raped by some pig things.  Or showing off a new hairstyle.  One of those two.]]
 
[[Image:BITEKONG1.png|thumb|Right|Donkey Kong being gang-raped by some pig things.  Or showing off a new hairstyle.  One of those two.]]
 +
 +
==Other Info==
  
 
===Quotes===
 
===Quotes===
 
*"Got any [[Banana Cream Pie|banana cream pie?]]"
 
*"Got any [[Banana Cream Pie|banana cream pie?]]"
*"Banana Slamma!!!"
+
*"Bananaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa Slamma!!!"
 +
*"OOOHHHH, BANANA."
 
*"♫Hold it now, hold it now, won ti dloh, won ti dloh!♫"
 
*"♫Hold it now, hold it now, won ti dloh, won ti dloh!♫"
 
*"♫Wait a [[hell|heck,]] what the sec.♫"
 
*"♫Wait a [[hell|heck,]] what the sec.♫"
Line 38: Line 43:
 
*"Walk in your shoes!"
 
*"Walk in your shoes!"
 
*"Oooooh, oooooh, oooooh, ahh, ahh, AAAAGGGGG!!!!!"
 
*"Oooooh, oooooh, oooooh, ahh, ahh, AAAAGGGGG!!!!!"
 +
*"Ape..."
 
*"I've Fallen, & I Can't Get Up!!!!!!!!! Can [[you]] pass me a banana, little buddy?"
 
*"I've Fallen, & I Can't Get Up!!!!!!!!! Can [[you]] pass me a banana, little buddy?"
 
*"I'm... [[No]]t?"
 
*"I'm... [[No]]t?"
 
*"♫WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL, if what [[you]] say is tru-u-ue...♫"
 
*"♫WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL, if what [[you]] say is tru-u-ue...♫"
*"♫I'M REALLY ONE OF [[You|YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!♫]]"
+
*"♫I'M REALLY ONE OF [[You|YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!]]"
 +
[[Image:Russia Kong.jpg|thumb|right|[[Russia]] longs for the awaited destruction of Donkey Kong.]]
 +
*"♫WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL, if what [[you]] say is tru-u-ue... then I guess I'm in [[Hell|HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!]]♫"
 
*"♫Gonna steal, gonna be untruuue.♫"
 
*"♫Gonna steal, gonna be untruuue.♫"
 
*"♫Walk in [[King K. Rool|his]] shooooooooooooes.♫"
 
*"♫Walk in [[King K. Rool|his]] shooooooooooooes.♫"
 
*"♫My hand looks like ''aluminum foillllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!''♫"
 
*"♫My hand looks like ''aluminum foillllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!''♫"
 
*"♫I'm a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead.♫"
 
*"♫I'm a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead.♫"
*"♫[[Eddy|Eddie]], let me go back to my home!  Without me everything's all wrongnorw lla s'gnihtyreve em tuohtiw.  emoh ym ot kcab og em tel, eidde!♫"
+
*"♫[[NO!]] I CAN'T BELIEVE WHAT I SEE!♫"
 +
*"♫[[Eddy|Eddie]], let me go back to my home!!  Without me everything's all wrongnorw lla s'gnihtyreve em tuohtiw.  emoh ym ot kcab og em tel, eiddE!!♫"
 
*"♫Eddie, Eddie, Eddie Eddie Eddie Eddie EddieEddieEddieEddieEddieEddie EDDIE Eddie, Eddie Eddie Eddie-Eddie!♫"
 
*"♫Eddie, Eddie, Eddie Eddie Eddie Eddie EddieEddieEddieEddieEddieEddie EDDIE Eddie, Eddie Eddie Eddie-Eddie!♫"
 
*"♫HELLLLLLLLLLP MEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-EEEEEEEEEEEEEE-EEEEEEEEEEEEEE-EEEEEEEEEEEEEE-EEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!♫"
 
*"♫HELLLLLLLLLLP MEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-EEEEEEEEEEEEEE-EEEEEEEEEEEEEE-EEEEEEEEEEEEEE-EEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!♫"
Line 56: Line 65:
 
*"Where it's possible, ordercy is from respects, your your you am service wondering where it's identical it'd appear."
 
*"Where it's possible, ordercy is from respects, your your you am service wondering where it's identical it'd appear."
 
*"I am of your realness!"
 
*"I am of your realness!"
 +
*"That's what Gingrich said! He will ''hang'' this area networks; Castle Grande transaction things."
 +
*"Where in place, prevention side."
 +
*"They don't have all of this [[war]]! Pretty close to the jersey about the color, which is identical."
 +
*"Has learned that some of the brothers and sisters..."
 +
*"This is just ridiculous, and there is absolutely essential that we still don't have a family!"
 +
*"Of parents, I'm sure you're sorry to say that."
 +
*"One, there is identical to the twenty-year ''the thing which is the possibility of making'' were responsible."
 +
*"For the season with respect, to what would you answer this morning 'where is the addiction?'"
 +
*"To twenty years."
 +
*"Why don't you really think so?!"
 +
*"I'm the ''original'' member of the [[KKK]]!"
 +
*"♫[[OH MY GOD DK WATCH OUT!!!!!!!!|I don't know what's happenin' tooooo me...!]]♫"
 +
*"♫[[NO|NOOOOO! NOOOOO! NOOOOOOO!! NOOOOOOOOO!!!]]♫"
 +
*"♫I can't see what [[God|I believe!]]♫"
 +
*"♫PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEASSEEEEEEEE!!!♫"
 +
*"♫[[Tenacious D|OHHHHHHHHHHHH MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!!!]]♫"
 +
*"♫[[You]] gotta [[sex]]!♫"
 +
*"♫If you send this to me...♫"
 +
*"♫If you send me back, I'll suck my [[penis]].♫"
 +
*"SUUUUUUUUUU-PAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-DOOOOOOOONNNNN-KEYYYYYYYYYYYY-KOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGG! [[2|TWOOOOOOOOO]]"
  
 
===Family Lines===
 
===Family Lines===
[[Whore Yoshi|Candy Kong]]: Girlfriend of Donkey Kong
+
[[Image:Ape2.png|thumb|DK's reaction to reading this article.]]
 
+
[[Image:retardkong.jpg|thumb|left|Donkey Kong on a bad morning.]]
Diddy Kong: Nephew of Donkey Kong (Little Buddy)
+
*[[Whore Yoshi|Candy Kong]]: Girlfriend of Donkey Kong
 
+
*[[Diddy Kong]]: Nephew of Donkey Kong (Little Buddy)
Dixie Kong: Girlfriend of Diddy Kong (Little Buddy's Fuck Buddy)
+
*Dixie Kong: Girlfriend of Diddy Kong (Little Buddy's Fuck Buddy)
 
+
*[[Fat|Chunky Kong]]: Kiddy Kong's Brother (He's one [[Hell]] of a guy.)
[[Fat|Chunky Kong]]: Kiddy Kong's Brother (He's one [[Hell]] of a guy.)
+
*Lanky Kong: Relative to the Manky Kongs (He has no [[penis]] or [[balls]].)
[[Image:retardkong.jpg|thumb|Right|Donkey Kong on a bad morning.]]
+
*Kiddy Kong: Chunky Kong's Brother
Lanky Kong: Relative to the Manky Kongs (He just digs [[Courage|Courage The Cowardly Dog]].)
+
*Tiny Kong: Sister of Dixie Kong
 
+
*Cranky Kong: Grandfather (?)
Kiddy Kong: Chunky Kong's Brother
+
*Wrinkly Kong (deceased): Grandmother
 
+
*Funky Kong: Relative of some sort
Tiny Kong: Sister of Dixie Kong
 
  
 
===Trivia===
 
===Trivia===
 +
[[Image:DkkartDS.jpg|thumb|right|DK, after totally wrecking his [[Mario Kart|race kart]]. He's in big trouble now, folks!]]
 
*He likes the [[Banana Cream Pie]]. ([[BarnabasB]] proved it.)
 
*He likes the [[Banana Cream Pie]]. ([[BarnabasB]] proved it.)
 
*[[NintyScreen]] approves of him.
 
*[[NintyScreen]] approves of him.
Line 78: Line 107:
 
*He sometimes is seen as a [[Rapping Rhino|rapper]], as well as some sort of a strange engrish type thing with King K. Rool. (Who wants [[no]] news, [[no]] calls, and [[no]] tyranny until tomorrow.)
 
*He sometimes is seen as a [[Rapping Rhino|rapper]], as well as some sort of a strange engrish type thing with King K. Rool. (Who wants [[no]] news, [[no]] calls, and [[no]] tyranny until tomorrow.)
 
*Said that he had [[AIDS]] once.
 
*Said that he had [[AIDS]] once.
*He also said that he's got two [[Coca-Cola|cokes]], but Diddy Kong's slick with that.
+
*He also said that he's got two [[Coca-Cola|cokes]], but [[Diddy Kong]]'s slick with that.
*He was once the main guy that was being sued by [[Retard|Universal Studios]] for simply having a name that was similar to the name King Kong. Donkey Kong would eventually win this case, and would then stay with [[Nintendo]] with all the bananas that he could eat until he decided to retire. (Wait, What? He didn't retire, [[retard|stupid]].)
+
*He was once the main guy that was being sued by Universal Studios for simply having a name that was similar to the name King Kong. Donkey Kong would eventually win this case, and would then stay with [[Nintendo]] with all the bananas that he could eat until he decided to retire. (Wait, What? He didn't retire, stupid.)
 
*HE'S THE FUC[[The King|KING]] FINAL BOSS IN PUNCH OUT!! FOR THE [[Nintendo|NINTENDO]] [[Wii|WII]]!!! WHAT IN THE [[Angry Nintendo Nerd|HOLY MOTHER OF FUCK]] IS HE DOING THERE???
 
*HE'S THE FUC[[The King|KING]] FINAL BOSS IN PUNCH OUT!! FOR THE [[Nintendo|NINTENDO]] [[Wii|WII]]!!! WHAT IN THE [[Angry Nintendo Nerd|HOLY MOTHER OF FUCK]] IS HE DOING THERE???
 
**HE'S BEATING YOUR ASS, THAT'S WHAT!!!
 
**HE'S BEATING YOUR ASS, THAT'S WHAT!!!
Line 90: Line 119:
 
*Has a strange form called "Robo Donkey Kong".
 
*Has a strange form called "Robo Donkey Kong".
 
*He likes to throw punches in bunches and bunches in punches.
 
*He likes to throw punches in bunches and bunches in punches.
 +
*Also likes seeing the new Donkey Kong Country Returns game.
 +
**He likes the Wii U sequel, ''Donkey Kong Country: Tropical Freeze'' even moreso. Especially since his main-man, David Wise, came back to compose the music.
 +
*One time, [[King K. Rool|Kaptain K. Rool]] cut off DK's head, cloned it, and used the living, body-less heads as cannon balls. It is unknown how he survived this, or why K. Rool did this.
 +
*Hates [[Dry Bones]], and will not only trip him when he sees him, but also [[Yoshi]] when he gives Dry Bones a hand.
 +
*Recently, whenever he sings "♫I don't know what's happenin' tooooo me...!♫" an airplane comes and kills the near-by listener of his song. His first ever victim: [[President Barack Obama]]!
 +
*Once became a human, and changed his name to [[Wreck-It Ralph (Character)|Wreck-It Ralph]].
 
[[Image:DonkeyKonghowhigh.jpg|frame|left|Donkey Kong wonders how [[Magic Drugs|high]] [[you]] can get.]]
 
[[Image:DonkeyKonghowhigh.jpg|frame|left|Donkey Kong wonders how [[Magic Drugs|high]] [[you]] can get.]]
 +
*He's the leader of Korea, he's got diarrhea, he's finally back, to say mama mia! His squirt gun, can shot piss. If he squirts ya, it's gonna suck dude. He has a funny face and has not pants. He's the worst member of the Dic Fan Club, huh!
 +
 
[[Category:Video Game Characters]]
 
[[Category:Video Game Characters]]
 
[[Category:Boxers]]
 
[[Category:Boxers]]
 
[[Category:Characters - Appears in Punch Out!! Series]]
 
[[Category:Characters - Appears in Punch Out!! Series]]
[[Category:Retarded Characters]]
 
 
[[Category:Animals]]
 
[[Category:Animals]]
 
[[Category:Characters - Appears in Super Smash Bros.]]
 
[[Category:Characters - Appears in Super Smash Bros.]]
Line 101: Line 137:
 
[[Category:Anti-Heroic Characters]]
 
[[Category:Anti-Heroic Characters]]
 
[[Category:Fighters]]
 
[[Category:Fighters]]
 +
[[Category:Characters - Appears in The Simpsons]]
 
[[Category:Race Car Drivers]]
 
[[Category:Race Car Drivers]]
 +
[[Category:Basketball Players]]
 +
[[Category:Nintendo Characters]]

Latest revision as of 19:54, 8 January 2020

CharNice.jpg This article is filed under Characters.

Error creating thumbnail: File missing

Name: Donkey Kong
Appears In: Donkey Kong Country
Sex: Male
Occupation(s): Protector of Kongo-Bongo and the Crystal Coconut
Played By: Milton "Soupy Sales" Supman/Richard Yearwood/Grant Kirkhope/Takashi Nagasako/Kōichi Yamadera

Donkey Kong is one of the first video game characters to ever appear on a Nintendo game. He was originally a bad guy, but that was really Cranky Kong. He's also the final boss in Punch-Out!!

In Brief[edit]

He's the leader of the bunch, you know him well. He's finally back to kick some tail. His coconut gun can fire in spurts. If he shoots ya, it's gonna hurt. He's bigger, faster, and stronger too. He's the first member of the DK Crew.

The Kong now known as Cranky made his debut when he went mad and kidnapped Mario's old prostitute, then tried to murder Mario with large barrels as he chased after them. The current Donkey Kong is somewhat of a hero, saving the jungle even if he's only motivated by bitches, cash-money, and getting back his bananas. And the two other times he was stupid enough to be kidnapped, meaning he did not star in two out of three Donkey Kong Country games, even though he's in the title. Whatever. He was the star again in Donkey Kong 64, along with 4 other Kongs. All of these games involve King K. Rool being the main villain, especially with him doing different things for each of these games.

{{#ev:youtube|uSZETPjW25M|320}}

He has appeared in several (three) other of his own games since the Rare-developed ones. In Jungle Climber he climbs things, and in Jungle Beat he beats up things. See a pattern?

Be sure not to mess with DK's bananas. That really rustles his jimmies.

His Part In Youtube Poop[edit]

Donkey Kong starred in his own TV series with the same name as his first SNES game, Donkey Kong Country. This show is commonly used as a source by some, like Cortes, RideTheCatfish or BarnabasB.

The Fake DK[edit]

The ape we all know and love is in fact Donkey Kong Jr. He first appeared rescuing his father from Mario. He persued his own career as a teacher while his papa got smacked again.

Jr. soon grew up in 1994 with Donkey Kong Country. The original Kong was now old and wrinkly, and is married (though that wasn't found out until DKC2). But what Jr. didn't realize was that King K. Rool, the supposed villain of the trilogy, happens to be in Cranky Kong's ropes. Nobody knew that until some people played the sequel and the sequel after that.

Donkey Kong being gang-raped by some pig things. Or showing off a new hairstyle. One of those two.

Other Info[edit]

Quotes[edit]

  • "Got any banana cream pie?"
  • "Bananaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa Slamma!!!"
  • "OOOHHHH, BANANA."
  • "♫Hold it now, hold it now, won ti dloh, won ti dloh!♫"
  • "♫Wait a heck, what the sec.♫"
  • "WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!"
  • "♫I get it, I get it little buddy that's slick, but I've got two cokes.♫"
  • "♫Desmirtshized, Desmirtshized.♫"
  • "♫I HAVE AIDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!♫"
  • "Walk in your shoes!"
  • "Oooooh, oooooh, oooooh, ahh, ahh, AAAAGGGGG!!!!!"
  • "Ape..."
  • "I've Fallen, & I Can't Get Up!!!!!!!!! Can you pass me a banana, little buddy?"
  • "I'm... Not?"
  • "♫WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL, if what you say is tru-u-ue...♫"
  • "♫I'M REALLY ONE OF YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!♫"
Error creating thumbnail: File missing
Russia longs for the awaited destruction of Donkey Kong.
  • "♫WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL, if what you say is tru-u-ue... then I guess I'm in HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!♫"
  • "♫Gonna steal, gonna be untruuue.♫"
  • "♫Walk in his shooooooooooooes.♫"
  • "♫My hand looks like aluminum foillllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!♫"
  • "♫I'm a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead, a metalhead.♫"
  • "♫NO! I CAN'T BELIEVE WHAT I SEE!♫"
  • "♫Eddie, let me go back to my home!! Without me everything's all wrongnorw lla s'gnihtyreve em tuohtiw. emoh ym ot kcab og em tel, eiddE!!♫"
  • "♫Eddie, Eddie, Eddie Eddie Eddie Eddie EddieEddieEddieEddieEddieEddie EDDIE Eddie, Eddie Eddie Eddie-Eddie!♫"
  • "♫HELLLLLLLLLLP MEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-EEEEEEEEEEEEEE-EEEEEEEEEEEEEE-EEEEEEEEEEEEEE-EEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!♫"
  • "This walking which the sibling will hang the fairy in words."
  • "We pass over and with indefinetly rolls."
  • "We're in place for about genzite."
  • "In often and only as water color where he calls it in what is he about the color which is identical has life that's whom the brothers and sisters... will hang with this and this skip back Kalities and there is absolute question that we please scoop out after family of parents, I your your service am wondering where it's identical it'd appear."
  • "Anything which is the possibility of making."
  • "Where it's possible, ordercy is from respects, your your you am service wondering where it's identical it'd appear."
  • "I am of your realness!"
  • "That's what Gingrich said! He will hang this area networks; Castle Grande transaction things."
  • "Where in place, prevention side."
  • "They don't have all of this war! Pretty close to the jersey about the color, which is identical."
  • "Has learned that some of the brothers and sisters..."
  • "This is just ridiculous, and there is absolutely essential that we still don't have a family!"
  • "Of parents, I'm sure you're sorry to say that."
  • "One, there is identical to the twenty-year the thing which is the possibility of making were responsible."
  • "For the season with respect, to what would you answer this morning 'where is the addiction?'"
  • "To twenty years."
  • "Why don't you really think so?!"
  • "I'm the original member of the KKK!"
  • "♫I don't know what's happenin' tooooo me...!♫"
  • "♫NOOOOO! NOOOOO! NOOOOOOO!! NOOOOOOOOO!!!♫"
  • "♫I can't see what I believe!♫"
  • "♫PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEASSEEEEEEEE!!!♫"
  • "♫OHHHHHHHHHHHH MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!!!♫"
  • "♫You gotta sex!♫"
  • "♫If you send this to me...♫"
  • "♫If you send me back, I'll suck my penis.♫"
  • "SUUUUUUUUUU-PAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-DOOOOOOOONNNNN-KEYYYYYYYYYYYY-KOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGG! TWOOOOOOOOO"

Family Lines[edit]

Error creating thumbnail: File missing
DK's reaction to reading this article.
Error creating thumbnail: File missing
Donkey Kong on a bad morning.
  • Candy Kong: Girlfriend of Donkey Kong
  • Diddy Kong: Nephew of Donkey Kong (Little Buddy)
  • Dixie Kong: Girlfriend of Diddy Kong (Little Buddy's Fuck Buddy)
  • Chunky Kong: Kiddy Kong's Brother (He's one Hell of a guy.)
  • Lanky Kong: Relative to the Manky Kongs (He has no penis or balls.)
  • Kiddy Kong: Chunky Kong's Brother
  • Tiny Kong: Sister of Dixie Kong
  • Cranky Kong: Grandfather (?)
  • Wrinkly Kong (deceased): Grandmother
  • Funky Kong: Relative of some sort

Trivia[edit]

Error creating thumbnail: File missing
DK, after totally wrecking his race kart. He's in big trouble now, folks!
  • He likes the Banana Cream Pie. (BarnabasB proved it.)
  • NintyScreen approves of him.
  • SnakeManEXE, however, does not approve of DK, or this article.
  • He sometimes is seen as a rapper, as well as some sort of a strange engrish type thing with King K. Rool. (Who wants no news, no calls, and no tyranny until tomorrow.)
  • Said that he had AIDS once.
  • He also said that he's got two cokes, but Diddy Kong's slick with that.
  • He was once the main guy that was being sued by Universal Studios for simply having a name that was similar to the name King Kong. Donkey Kong would eventually win this case, and would then stay with Nintendo with all the bananas that he could eat until he decided to retire. (Wait, What? He didn't retire, stupid.)
  • HE'S THE FUCKING FINAL BOSS IN PUNCH OUT!! FOR THE NINTENDO WII!!! WHAT IN THE HOLY MOTHER OF FUCK IS HE DOING THERE???
    • HE'S BEATING YOUR ASS, THAT'S WHAT!!!
  • Doc Louis seriously loves him so much, that he wanted to get his autograph after Little Mac's fight with him.
  • He seems to take a liking to Metallica's "Black Album."
  • The voice actor for the Donkey Kong Country animated series, Richard Yearwood, would later on end up voice acting for one of the characters of the two Dino Crisis games.
  • Everyone on DK Island has a last name of Kong, suggesting that the entire Kong family is inbred.
  • Has a strange form called "Robo Donkey Kong".
  • He likes to throw punches in bunches and bunches in punches.
  • Also likes seeing the new Donkey Kong Country Returns game.
    • He likes the Wii U sequel, Donkey Kong Country: Tropical Freeze even moreso. Especially since his main-man, David Wise, came back to compose the music.
  • One time, Kaptain K. Rool cut off DK's head, cloned it, and used the living, body-less heads as cannon balls. It is unknown how he survived this, or why K. Rool did this.
  • Hates Dry Bones, and will not only trip him when he sees him, but also Yoshi when he gives Dry Bones a hand.
  • Recently, whenever he sings "♫I don't know what's happenin' tooooo me...!♫" an airplane comes and kills the near-by listener of his song. His first ever victim: President Barack Obama!
  • Once became a human, and changed his name to Wreck-It Ralph.
Donkey Kong wonders how high you can get.
  • He's the leader of Korea, he's got diarrhea, he's finally back, to say mama mia! His squirt gun, can shot piss. If he squirts ya, it's gonna suck dude. He has a funny face and has not pants. He's the worst member of the Dic Fan Club, huh!