King K. Rool
King K. Rool (pronounced Kay Rule or Kuh-Rule depending on the media) is a corpulent and savage crocodile who is Donkey Kong's archenemy. He also longs to have the Crystal Coconut because he believes it will make him the richest man in the world. Of Donkey Kong's various nemeses, he remains the most iconic, and has recently roared back after years of irrelevance.
In YouTube Poop
He's the main villain in the Donkey Kong Country TV show, in which DK is obviously the hero. This version of him is what gets used the most, particularly some of his musical numbers (lower right). King K. Rool became a prominent figure in YouChew culture through his cartoon depiction, especially the "One of Us" song, which was blared on the forums quite a bit throughout 2010 and 2011.
He is very fond of lies and fibs, cheats and steals, and his treacherous villainy makes him squeal. He is a croc of many faces, with his alter egos including a captain and a mad scientist.
He is pathetic as a king, constantly trying and failing to steal the Crystal Coconut. He has, however managed to steal the Kongs' bananas, despite his species not even eating bananas.
Irrelevance and Renaissance
One of King K. Rool's grand ambitions in life was to get into Super Smash Bros. Brawl. Apparently, he was excluded because of his hatred of news, calls and tyranny before tomorrow, and his refusal to return the Banana Cream Pie when DK asked for it.
After being passed over for Brawl, K. Rool had a rough decade. While Donkey Kong Country returned in 2010 with, uh... Donkey Kong Country Returns, Tiki Tong and his minions have taken over K. Rool and the Kremlings' spot in annoying the DK family. Reports indicate that K. Rool was so occupied in pleasuring himself with bananas in the Captain's cabin of the Gangplank Galleon that he missed his audition to be the final boss in Donkey Kong Country Returns. By the time he noticed this, it was already Christmas, far too late.
Super Smash Bros. for Nintendo 3DS and Wii U came in 2014, and once again saw K. Rool passed over for a playable spot. With Donkey Kong Country: Tropical Freeze once again eschewing K. Rool, this time in favor of Arctic baddies, K. Rool's hopes of clawing back into relevancy seemed in despair.
However, King K. Rool retained his devout fanbase, with his character oozing considerably more personality than subsequent Donkey Kong villains. His legion of mean and green scaly sheens seized the opportunity provided by the Fighter Ballot, which was a means of requesting a character you wanted to see playable in Smash. Nintendo finally figured out the demand for K. Rool, and in August of 2018, he was finally announced for Super Smash Bros. Ultimate as a playable character. Whether or not it propels him back into mainline Donkey Kong games remains to be seen, as there has not been a new Donkey Kong game since his Smash debut.
- Anything that praises him.
- A mean and green scaly sheen.
- Treacherous Villainy
- Long walks on the beach.
- Making Donkey Kong learn lessons.
- Jumping around in circles, shouting "I'm a Nazi!" over and over again.
- Lies and Fibs
- Steals, Steels, Stealers, and The Pittsburgh Steelers
- Squealing (Only when talkiong about his treachorous villainry.)
- Committing Vices
- Never Tipping
- Butting in lines.
- Never cleaning the dishes. (Infact, it suits him fine.)
- Being such a sleaze.
- Allowing someone to suck his dick.
- Anything in his arse, other than boots.
- Boxing as a giant.
- The Crystal Coconut
- Trying to steal the Crystal Coconut.
- His ship, the Gangplank Galleon.
- Super Smash Bros. Ultimate
- Donkey Kong
- Any other type of Kong. (though it is unknown what he thinks of King Kong.)
- Bananas (When they're not in his ass.)
- People with the nerve to walk in HIS shoes! (The strange thing is that he doesn't wear any shoes!)
- Boots in the arse (like to the right at 4:44).
- Basically anything that isn't himself.
- Tyranny before tomorrow.
- Wario's Shipyard
- Krunch (for defecting while sent on a spying mission)
- K. Lumsy (for refusing to destroy Kong Island, and for later beating the shit out of him.)
He has a knack for taking things that don't belong to him, and getting beat up by smelly apes. He can also grow the voice of a demon whenever he wants to get really menacing.
- WHY NOT?!?!?
- I'M A NAZI! I'M A NAZI!!!
- TO THE MINE CART!
- I'LL STOCKPILE HUNDREDS! THOUSANDS!
- BEAT MY MEAN AND GREEN AND SCALY COCK!
- KLUMP! DIDN'T I SAY NO NEWS, NO CALLS, NO TYRANNY UNTIL TOMORROW?!
- The water color of J listens. From here, it explains...
- And the thing...starts!
- Your intermediately lumincitensity and gray can justice our thing! A calling: even you sees it. All about us.
- The water cooler, but here it stands for...
- It's a completely different issue from here, and here we see.
- Where Crocodile is the hardest time.
- You care about a meter? See Steve Gunderson think... stars.
- Well it's not a New York, One. You will it begin.
- And inside the North Carolina, he did was - I wasn't going to need in this instance countries.
- And justice are what he called 'you can see the satellite us'.
- Despite King K. Rool's lack of intelligence, Kremlings as a race are actually somewhat intelligent, able to build a wide variety of technologies, from airships to robots.
- Despite the piratey look of his Gangplank Galleon and its crew, they are actually part of the Kremling Navy, along with the Flying Crock (of shit) and his unnamed ship from Donkey Kong 64.
- Adopted a Mayan look for Mario Super Sluggers.
- This would be his last appearance of prominence (i.e. not counting trophies) until his grand debut in Super Smash Bros. Ultimate.
- Lost his tail in a fight with Donkey Kong. Ouch.
- His original Kingdom, Crocodile Isle, was actually destroyed. His new kingdom is actually a floating vessel.