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From Chewiki Archive - YouChew: 1% Funny, 99% Hot Gas
CharNice.jpg This article is filed under Characters.
Jafar giving a perverted look at his own page

Basic info[edit]

Jafar is a villain who comes from Agrabah. He makes weird faces all the time and likes to hurt animals, specially his pet parrot and lover Iago, by crushing a moving wall on them. He once became very powerful and wants Mama Luigi dead and wants TREE to be the punishment. He built his own personal planet by taking Volvic Revive, shit, and Dr Rabbit´s ass mixing them with Anti-Uctions previouly digested by Kenshiro. He is also one of Gwonam´s brothers.

Cultural Heritage: Arabian

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Jafar glares at his parrot, Iago.


  • Iago
  • Power
  • Harming harmless animals.
  • Getting crushed by doors.
  • Making weird facial expressions.
  • Ganon´s Opera
  • Touching little kids inappropriately.
  • Pulling down the Genie's pants.
  • The Cave of Uctions
  • Shoving crackers up Iago´s ass.
  • Changing Forms
  • Having pointy shoulders.
  • Challenging LULZ Sora at making retarded faces.
  • Demanding the Sultan to make Jasmine marry the Bagel.
  • Morphing into a Granny and grabbing people.
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Jafar on a polluted Thursday afternoon


Legal issues[edit]

As mentioned before, Jafar is a serial rapist, a pedophile and a terrorist who uses Boomaga 99 spells to make havoc. He once managed to molest Sora while he was whacking Heartless in Agrabah. Sora shoved his keeblayd up Jafar´s ass in the aftermath as revenge. A trial is still to be held and Jafar´s ass still hurts.


A few days after Jafar finished his homemade planet, Sora together with his gang, The Street Rats, destroyed his planet with a nuclear laser which killed every life form on it, including Jafar. It is rumored that he had eaten a green mushroom just before that so he will be coming back from the Pit.


  • "And the boy was a criminal"
  • "Things are unraveling fast now boy"
  • "awww Iago"
  • "DEATH..."
    • "by beheading"
  • "UCHINS"
  • "Dumb animals"
  • "Whoever has the gold makes the rules, *wheeeeze*"
  • *maniacal cackling and laughter*
  • "That was invigorating. Come Abis Mal, we have other lives to ruin."
  • "And you my queeen, shall be defeated by a bunch of filthy strippers"
  • "The Princess will marry Chad Warden!"
  • "Piiiiiiiiiiiiiinkyyyyyyy"
  • "My thumb is number one on EVERY list!"
  • "Indeed I will Princess!"
  • "I BITCH you've got a bunny under your hat!
  • "Come on CLAAHWN, let's see what you've GATT!"