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Volvic Revive
From Chewiki Archive - YouChew:
1% Funny, 99% Hot Gas
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This article refers to either a food found in Youtube Poop, or an article related to food. Either way, it sure is delicious. MMMMMMMMMM, food!
Volvic Revive is a drink that is filled with ginseng and guarana, and helps keep you ALEEEEEEEEERT! The only known source of Volvic Revive is George Volcano.
Gossip[edit]
The drink has been banned in many countries for possessing the ability to raise the dead. Volvic Revive is a highly prized and sought-after substance because of this. Unfortunately, George the Volcano (the aforementioned only known source) is slightly mad at the best of times and may have you perform various tasks for him before he allows you to try some. Other fun facts about Volvic Revive:
- Tyrannosaurus Alan uses it to enhance his pea-sized brain in order to commit horrific genocide on the Saber-Toothed Tigers.
- Contrary to popular belief, George's birds do not like Volvic Revive. They instead prefer his more "twisted" volcano juices.
- Hinata's power of resurretion nullifies her ever having to drink Volvic Revive.
- Megatron, Starscream and Soundwave use Volvic Revive in their energon cubes. Optimus Prime, Grimlock and the rest of the Autobots used to use it until the day when a selfish Rodimus Prime drank it all up, forcing them to stick to Stella Artois.
- It might cause a diseased version of hell. (Because a regular version of hell is oh so pleasent.)
- Volvic Revive is the cure for HIV, cancer, sickle cell anemia, and obesity, yet no one knows that it is.