Notice: We are aware that many of the Chewiki’s images are still broken. We promise: we will try our best to fix it, but we don't guarantee that the fix will be trivial.
Kingdom Cum
Kingdom Cum is a kingdom that is obviously obsessed with cum. It is a magical place where cum is available in infinite amounts for consumption.
Many people have visited it, and it is also a successful amusement park.
History
Beginnings
Kingdom Cum was founded in 1879 on an island in the English Channel by a gay man from Arabia, who had wanted a place where people could drink cum at will without persecution by Royals in the Middle East, Europe, and as far away as Eastern Asia. After word got out of its existence, people from all over the world flocked to Kingdom Cum.
During World War I, Kingdom Cum remained neutral.
World War II
During World War II, Kingdom Cum was taken over by Nazi Germany, who had built a concentration camp in the Kingdom. During this time, many of its inhabitants were sent to and killed in these camps. In 1944, though, Kingdom Cum was liberated by the British and American military forces, though despite this, they became neutral after liberation.
Post War and Turmoil
After World War II, faced with a dwindling population, the Tsar of Kingdom Cum made a decree in 1945 that all cum was to be reserved for reproductive purposes until the population had rebounded, which had caused an outrage in the normally peaceful kingdom, causing many of its citizens to leave the Kingdom for places such as the United Kingdom, France, the United States, Canada, and even as far as Japan and Korea.
Rebound, Recession, and 2nd Cumming
In the 1970s, the population, which had dwindled greatly since the 1940s, started to rebound, due to a mass increase in the number of people, who had originally come to visit, moving to the island to drink the infinite amounts of cum that Kingdom Cum boasted. In addition, the economy soared due to tourism from all over the world. This period of boom lasted until the early 1990s, when tourism fell, causing an economic recession, as the country's entire economy was built around tourism, with very little manufacturing and agricultural. In the mid Noughties, the recession ended with another boom in tourism, and an increase in the financial and manufacturing sectors, and the increase in the exports of cum.
Today
Today, Kingdom Cum is a successful island nation with a booming economy and booming tourism.
Economy
The economy of Kingdom Cum is nearly 75% tourism, which is down from 95% in 1980, due to an increase in the financial and manufacturing sectors of Kingdom Cum's economy in recent years, and from exports of cum to other countries throughout the world.
Government
The government of Kingdom Cum is a constitutional monarchy headed by Tsar Semenstrosky IV and Prime Minister Winston Jizenpantz of the Cum Cock Party.
Parliament
The parliament of Kingdom Cum is primarily dominated by the Cum Cock Party, which holds about 70% of the seats in the parliament. Other parties with members in parliament are the Semecratic Party (12%), the Cumservative Party (12%), the Splücialist Party (5%), and the Cummunist Party (1 member). Independent members consist of 0.95% of the parliament.
Crime
Crime rates are currently 5%, 75% of which are sexual harassment and assault charges. Murder rates in Kingdom Cum are at absolute 0, while robbery was 25%, of which, 100% of robbery crimes were robberies of Sperm Banks.
People Banned From Kingdom Cum
- King Koopa- Bombing attempts.
- Conker- Attempted destruction of the Kingdom.
- Regular Luigi- Trying to destroy Mama and Gay Luigi.
- Brock Samson- For the near-successful destruction of Kingdom Cum. (See below)
- King Harkinian- Banned for homophobic behavior.
- You- Because they said so.
- Yoshi- Cumming everywhere and trying to make Kingdom Cum look like a blizzard ran through it.
- Larry Koopa- People thought that Cheasty's cum was snow instead, and some people drank it.
- Pee-Wee Herman - For noise pollution in the form of screaming every time someone says the "secret word".
- Rico Papi Chulo - For actually putting his cum on his own hair, just to make it spiky.
- Chad Warden - See Rico Papi Chulo.
- Wolverine - Eating the turkey from Kingdom Cum's 100th anniversary without saying grace (However, he didn't know that the turkey was drenched and stuffed with cum.).
- Magneto - For crashing Kingdom Cum's 100th anniversary for yet another plan to destroy the X-Men (His speech to the X-Men in the short run was that they will die in cum.). In his defense, he didn't know that there was a special party involved.
- WalrusGuy - For saying it was spelled "come".
- Caractacus P. Doom - For his creepy obsession with it.
Attempted Destructions of Kingdom Cum
Numerous attempts have been made to destroy Kingdom Cum, mainly by people who are dicks that want to ruin it for everyone.
- Conker the Squirrel formed an alliance with Buga, Regular Luigi, Oogtar and Sonic to destroy Kingdom Cum. Failed due to Buga bragging about his "big bone" and Oogtar eating the explosives.
- Brock Samson almost succeeded in the destruction of Kingdom Cum, only to stop when God Luigi challenged him to a battle. (Brock won, by the way)
- King Koopa attempted to destroy the kingdom with bombs. Failed due to dropping them on the wrong place.
- Conker managed to successfully destroy the kingdom with a new army, but God Luigi rebuilt it.
- Scott once attempted to send shipments of termite-filled underwear to the citizens of Kingdom Cum as part of his terrible scheme, but failed because Google had the place closed for maintenance.
- Daisy tried to ally with Princess Toadstool to build a Large Hadron Collider, causing a void. It failed because they hadn't any hadrons to use.
- The ghost of Bowser Jr. tried taking over Kingdom Cum by haunting the whole Kingdom. His plans were foiled when Gwonam called the Ghostbusters.
