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Difference between revisions of "Darth Vader"
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*Once [[1|won]] the [[YTMND]] spelling bee. | *Once [[1|won]] the [[YTMND]] spelling bee. | ||
*In The Empire Strikes Back, an illusion of Vader was beheaded by Luke Skywalker in a cave on Dagobah. After coming to a standstill, the head then exploded to reveal Luke's face itself. | *In The Empire Strikes Back, an illusion of Vader was beheaded by Luke Skywalker in a cave on Dagobah. After coming to a standstill, the head then exploded to reveal Luke's face itself. | ||
+ | *Is honoured in the Ukraine by a statue, which replaced a statue of [[USSR|V. I. Lenin]]. | ||
+ | **In addition, he also ran for mayor in the Ukraine. | ||
*When he goes to <s>[[hell]]</s> heaven, he and Padmé will have endless celestial [[sex]]. | *When he goes to <s>[[hell]]</s> heaven, he and Padmé will have endless celestial [[sex]]. | ||
Revision as of 15:40, 9 December 2016
Darth Vader, a.k.a., Anakin Skywalker was supposed to lead the Jedi to defeat the Sith, but he ended up siding with the Sith and he almost defeated the Jedi.
Life As Anakin Skywalker & His Transformation
Warning: Spoilers ahead. I find your lack of faith disturbing if you have yet to see them.
As a kid, he would build C-3PO from scrap. He would later get appointed with the Jedi just so he could help destroy the Sith, as the force was strong with him. A few years later, he would become a Jedi Knight, yet slowly creeping torwards the dark side of the force. Emperor Palpatine (Who's really Darth Sidious in disguise.) wanted Anakin to join him, but he decided not to because he wanted to be with Padmé, and also still believed in the teachings of the Jedi. However, Palpatine corrupted Anakin, converting him to the dark side, all while conving him that he could save Padme. So, he joined him and he then went about massacreing almost all the Jedi in the galaxy. He eventually got stopped by his master Obi-Wan Kenobi, who cut off his legs. Obi-Wan let him burn in lava because he had become a Sith Lord, and had ceased to be the Jedi Knight that he knew and raised. However, Palpatine would later rescue him by putting him in a cool suit. However, he was saddened about his wife's death, so he spent all of his time caring for the Sith from here on out.
Life As a Sith Lord
After that time, he decided to use as many resources as he could so he could build a Death Star. It took him about 17 years to completely build his Death Star, but when it was finished, he was as happy as a dark Lord could possibly be. It increased when he finally killed his old master Obi-Wan Kenobi. However, that happiness would soon disappear when Luke Skywalker outsmarted him and he blew up his Death Star. With that crap happening to him, he decided to get some of Darth Sidious' money to help build a Death Star that they both would deem "indestructable." Meanwhile, he and his freinds decided to join Luke Skywalker and his freinds for a good dinner (Which is weird considering the fact that he can't eat with his cool mask on.). After that, he decided to betray Lando, who betrayed Han Solo, and then he would fight with Luke. After he cut off his hand, Darth Vader told Luke the most unforgettable truth that the world has ever heard and seen (The truth would be that he was Luke's father.). After Luke fell to a near-bottomless pit and almost died, Darth Vader continued on with his work of creating the second Death Star, which took only four years to nearly complete instead of 17.
Redemption and Death
When Luke allowed himself to be captured as a decoy, Darth Vader decided to have another battle against him, where Luke cut-off his hand, causing him to be mortally wounded. His fight was interrupted by his master, Emperor Palpatine. The Emperor wanted Luke to kill Vader and join the Dark Side, but he refused. When Darth Vader found out that he was lied to all this time, he decided to throw the Emperor into The Pit with his final living will, completing his transformation back into Anakin.
When Luke noticed this act, he saw the reawakening of the Jedi that was his father, and tried to escape and save him. After that, Anakin told Luke to take off his cool mask. When he did that, he told him that he was right all along, and that he had already saved him, before passing away silently in Luke's arms. Luke then escaped the Death Star with his body, then cremated it in the Jedi tradition. His soul, along with Yoda's and Obi-Wan's, would later be seen by Luke at the victory celebration in the Ewok Village, redeemed and returned to the light side of the force.
Quotes
- "*Breathing*"
- "I have altered the deal. Pray that I don't alter it further."
- "No, I am your father!"
- "You were right, Luke. You were right."
- "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
- "DO NOT WANT!!!"
- "Search your feelings; you know it to be true!"
- "We would be honoured, if you would join us."
- "He's as clumsy as he is stupid."
- "You've failed me for the last time, Admiral."
- "I sense something. A presence I've not felt since..."
- "I find your lack of faith disturbing."
- "Force is strong with this one..."
- "He will join us or die, master."
- "The circle is now complete. When I left you, I was but a learner. Now I am the master."
- "Luke, you can destroy the Emperor. He has forseen this. It is your destiny. Join me, and together, we can rule the galaxy as father and son."
Trivia
- Has choked many of his officers... with his (evil) Force. One of his punishees was Admiral Ozzel, who, according to Vader himself, "is as clumsy as he is stupid."
- In response to choking Admiral Ozzel, Darth Vader immediately promoted Captain Piett to Admiral, just as Ozzel was about to die. Unlike Ozzel, Piett actually avoided being choked (mostly by being more competent), instead dying in the Battle of Endor.
- Also said, at least one of his victims was choked, but not killed, as Vader was stopped by Governor Tarkin, who made Vader release him, though Vader's point in proving the power of the force still stood.
- Is the father of Luke Skywalker and Leia Organa.
- Was rated by the American Film Institute's 100 Years... 100 Heroes & Villians as the third-best villian in movie history (Losing out to Norman Bates of Psycho and Dr. Hannibal Lecter of The Silence of The Lambs as the best).
- Randomcontributor is his uncle-in-law.
- He is a master at Mario Kart Wii.
- Apparently, according to ThatGuyWithTheGlasses, he says that when Darth Vader's lightsaber (Or really, anyone else who owned a lightsaber in the Star Wars series.) collides with Wolverine's adamantium claws, two women perform cunnilingus (Which is where two (or more) women lick their pussy holes.).
- Was a character in Soulcalibur 4 with Yoda and The Apprentice (However, he did not appear in the PSP version, Soulcalibur: Broken Destiny). He only joined after confirming that it would have Ivy. He was very pleased with the results, despite the fact that they made Yoda a cheap bastard.
- He was also pleased to see all three of the Super Star Wars games from the SNES appear on the Nintendo Wii's Virtual Console.
- Also, he appeared in "Night at the Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian" in a cameo with Oscar the Grouch.
- Once won the YTMND spelling bee.
- In The Empire Strikes Back, an illusion of Vader was beheaded by Luke Skywalker in a cave on Dagobah. After coming to a standstill, the head then exploded to reveal Luke's face itself.
- Is honoured in the Ukraine by a statue, which replaced a statue of V. I. Lenin.
- In addition, he also ran for mayor in the Ukraine.
- When he goes to
hellheaven, he and Padmé will have endless celestial sex.