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Pyro
From Chewiki Archive - YouChew:
1% Funny, 99% Hot Gas
This article is filed under Characters.
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The Pyro (gender unknown) is a character in the game Team Fortress 2 and is the arch-enemy of the Spy. Its hobbies including burning things, setting things on fire, and killing people with its flamethrower.
Pyro's main dislike is being blown up (which happens A LOT).
Arsenal
Basic
- Flamethrower: Used short-range for burning his enemies to a crisp. Can also blow people back.
- Shotgun: Ugh, another shotgun...anyhow, used for slightly longer ranges.
- Axe: A novelty from Pyro's time as a failure of a firefighter, now for hacking open your ribcage instead of a locked door.
Updates
- Backburner: Replacing your Flamethrower, it does more damage when you burn the backs of enemies at the expense of your airblaster.
- Flare Gun: Can set distant foes aflame. Replaces the Shotgun.
- Axtinguisher: Does less damage normally than the Axe, but does 100% crit damage when they're on fire. You'd figure the barbed wire alone would do more damage, right?
- Postal Pummeler: One day the Pyro decided to pull a mailbox out of the ground and give his enemies an "express delivery" from Hell. Substituting the Axe, it works the same as the Axtinguisher, but other than blunt trauma, what kind of extra damage does it have? The sharp edges of the letters in the mailbox?
Community
- Homewrecker: A hammer that does more damage to Engineer buildings, although I don't see the point because you could just use your Flamethrower or Flare Gun. Can also whack enemy sappers off friendly buildings. At least it's actually handy now.
- Degreaser: For less burn damage you switch weapons faster. The logic to this? None at all, but handy for Pyros who are forced to go melee or shotgun.
- Powerjack: This hefty hammer deals more damage and restores health on a successful kill. Oh I get it. When you're struggling, you JACK their POWER by taking their health.
- Back Scratcher: This tough rake deals more damage, but Medics give less healing to you. You'll have to make do scavenging health crates, which in turn give you more health!
- Detonator: The Pyro can now detonate his Flares remotely, starting his own deadly fireworks display to the tune of Scouts running around shouting "FOI-YAH! FOI-YAH!"
Promotion
- Sharpened Volcano Fragment: Carved from The Pit's finest obsidian, this glowing Axe alternative sets opponents on fire. The Circle of Fire is complete.
- Maul: It's a weapon all the way from Planet Mars! But...functions the same as the Homewrecker. Only bother if you like how it looks.
Event
- Saxxy: Only a select few received this coveted statuette of good old Saxton said to have been carved by King Midas/Sauron specially for the Saxxy Awards replay contest. Now MORE people are turning their enemies into gold and holding bragging rights!
Special Note: When the Pyro wields the Degreaser, the Powerjack plus a hat called the "Attendant" together, he moves faster but is more vulnerable to bullets. W + M1 just got worse.
Quotes
- AHAHAHAHAHA OOOAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH
- OW
- MMMMM MMMM MMMMMMMMOOOOKMM MM
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Trivia
- Is one of the three only people Dan Hibiki has ever defeated, the others being Chuck Norris and Barry Scott.
- Was once killed by Soldier's Falcon Punch, only to be brought back to life because it's used to that sort of thing.
- Yearns to start a rock and roll band when TF2 is over, and can often be seen playing its axe like a guitar to shitty rap music.
- Medic has agreed to be violinist for Pyro's band, but first the never-ending war in Team Fortress must end.
- Has a potential immunity to Super AIDS. This has yet to be confirmed, however.
- Can perform a Gadoken, as seen in some videos.
- Looks like Adrian Shepard.
- Its gender is often the subject of debate and nobody is quite sure on who exists under that baggy suit.
- Has sued the man in the gas mask from that lame-looking horror movie, My Bloody Valentine.
- Owns a pink purse as seen in the respawn rooms in TF2.
- If you get a kill with this class, people will burn up with anger pretty easily. Heh heh, get it? Burn up? Pyro? Heh heh, eehh...
- It's a flamer. Lol, another fire joke...
- Has multiple Pokemon, all fire types.
- Has the same voice actor as the Spy, ironically.
- Worked with the Demoman on the pyrotechnics for KISS in the '70s and early '80s.
- Its suit contains asbestos.
- The Pyro spends some of its spare time helping the British Army control a mutant outbreak in London.