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Difference between revisions of "Gabe Newell"
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{{character}} | {{character}} | ||
| − | + | {{CharBox | |
| − | '''Gabe Newell''' (Alias ''GabeN'' | + | |name=Gabe Logan Newell |
| + | |image=Gabe_newell.jpg | ||
| + | |caption=Gabe Newell in all his glory | ||
| + | |sex=Male | ||
| + | |age=49 | ||
| + | |occupation=Managing Director of Valve Corporation | ||
| + | }} | ||
| + | '''Gabe Newell''' (Alias ''GabeN'', ''Gay Ben'' or ''G.A.B.E.N.'') is the co-founder of Valve Corporation, the company responsible for popular video games such as [[Gordon Freeman|Half-Life]], [[GLaDOS|Portal]], [[Team Fortress 2]] and [[Left 4 Dead]]. | ||
==History== | ==History== | ||
| + | [[Image:Gabe_Newell_GDC_2010.jpg|thumb|left|A younger Gaben.]] | ||
Gabe Newell was born in 1962, and he was the most intelligent man at Harvard University, causing a huge number of teachers to lose their job. He replaced all of them! Then with his gigantic brain, he went to [[Microsoft]], only to be fired by [[Bill Gates]] for hacking his high-tech computers. During his time in unemployment he became so depressed he began to eat his weight in food every day. Gabe's huge stockpile of [[money]] from his days at Microsoft began to dwindle quickly due to his newfound eating habits. It would be the next spring (after Gabe's hibernation) before he would answer a newspaper ad looking for a helping hand... | Gabe Newell was born in 1962, and he was the most intelligent man at Harvard University, causing a huge number of teachers to lose their job. He replaced all of them! Then with his gigantic brain, he went to [[Microsoft]], only to be fired by [[Bill Gates]] for hacking his high-tech computers. During his time in unemployment he became so depressed he began to eat his weight in food every day. Gabe's huge stockpile of [[money]] from his days at Microsoft began to dwindle quickly due to his newfound eating habits. It would be the next spring (after Gabe's hibernation) before he would answer a newspaper ad looking for a helping hand... | ||
[[Image:Gabe_3.jpg|thumb|Gabe Newell's great great grandpa, seen here plundering the high seas for "booty".]] | [[Image:Gabe_3.jpg|thumb|Gabe Newell's great great grandpa, seen here plundering the high seas for "booty".]] | ||
===Valve Corporation=== | ===Valve Corporation=== | ||
| − | Before Gabe turned it into a | + | Before Gabe turned it into a videogame company, Valve was a plumbing syndicate, founded by [[two]] [[Mario|famous]] [[Luigi|plumbers]], but the syndicate went bankrupt thanks to Gabe wasting all their money on food. So, he decided to turn the old plumbing corporation into a merry land of fun, joy, and [[Heavy Weapons Guy|Russians]]. This was a drastic business transition but it earned the company a big enough profit to keep itself afloat while still being able to manage Gabe's monstrous appetite. |
==List of video games made by Valve== | ==List of video games made by Valve== | ||
| Line 23: | Line 31: | ||
*Half Life 2: Deathmatch (2004) | *Half Life 2: Deathmatch (2004) | ||
*Counter-Strike: Source (2005) | *Counter-Strike: Source (2005) | ||
| − | *Day of | + | *Day of Defeat: Source (2005) |
| − | |||
*Half Life 2: Episode 1 (2006) | *Half Life 2: Episode 1 (2006) | ||
*The Orange Box (2007) | *The Orange Box (2007) | ||
| Line 39: | Line 46: | ||
*[[Food]] | *[[Food]] | ||
*[[Food]] | *[[Food]] | ||
| − | *[[Food]][[Image:GodNewell.jpg|thumb|right|250px|Gabe Newell's final form.]] | + | *[[Food]] |
| + | *[[My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic]] ([[No]] [[Shit]]!) | ||
| + | *His beard. | ||
| + | [[Image:GodNewell.jpg|thumb|right|250px|Gabe Newell's final form.]] | ||
==Dislikes== | ==Dislikes== | ||
| Line 46: | Line 56: | ||
*Being called "Gay Ben" | *Being called "Gay Ben" | ||
*[[PS3]], until recently when, [[Chad Warden]] said he would take away his food if he didn't make Portal 2 on the PS3 better than on the [[Xbox 360|360]]. | *[[PS3]], until recently when, [[Chad Warden]] said he would take away his food if he didn't make Portal 2 on the PS3 better than on the [[Xbox 360|360]]. | ||
| + | *The number 3 | ||
==Liked by== | ==Liked by== | ||
| − | *Half-Life Fans | + | *Half-Life Fans |
| + | *Bronies | ||
*His wife | *His wife | ||
| Line 56: | Line 68: | ||
==Trivia== | ==Trivia== | ||
| + | *To stop a '''Gay Ben''', you must gently calm it down and press the '''Gaben'''. | ||
*He has a wife and two diabetic children. | *He has a wife and two diabetic children. | ||
*He's also playable in [[Left 4 Dead]]. | *He's also playable in [[Left 4 Dead]]. | ||
| + | *He is a playable character in Freak Fortress and Vs. Saxton Hale custom gamemodes for [[Team Fortress 2]]. | ||
*He caused at least three quarters of every single earthquake from 1963 to date. | *He caused at least three quarters of every single earthquake from 1963 to date. | ||
*[[TyrannosaurusReich]] loves him. Maybe even more than he loves Mai. | *[[TyrannosaurusReich]] loves him. Maybe even more than he loves Mai. | ||
| Line 63: | Line 77: | ||
*He has a secret desire to be [[Ringo Starr]] of [[The Beatles]]. | *He has a secret desire to be [[Ringo Starr]] of [[The Beatles]]. | ||
*Everytime you insult Gabe's girth, Episode 3 gets delayed another week. Think about that before you say something next time. | *Everytime you insult Gabe's girth, Episode 3 gets delayed another week. Think about that before you say something next time. | ||
| + | *Super Mario 64 taught him that games are art,and Doom taught him games are the future of entertainment. | ||
| + | *[[GLaDOS]] knows he's a procrastinator. | ||
[[Category: Characters]] | [[Category: Characters]] | ||
Latest revision as of 09:32, 17 January 2017
This article is filed under Characters.Gabe Newell (Alias GabeN, Gay Ben or G.A.B.E.N.) is the co-founder of Valve Corporation, the company responsible for popular video games such as Half-Life, Portal, Team Fortress 2 and Left 4 Dead.
History[edit]
Gabe Newell was born in 1962, and he was the most intelligent man at Harvard University, causing a huge number of teachers to lose their job. He replaced all of them! Then with his gigantic brain, he went to Microsoft, only to be fired by Bill Gates for hacking his high-tech computers. During his time in unemployment he became so depressed he began to eat his weight in food every day. Gabe's huge stockpile of money from his days at Microsoft began to dwindle quickly due to his newfound eating habits. It would be the next spring (after Gabe's hibernation) before he would answer a newspaper ad looking for a helping hand...
Valve Corporation[edit]
Before Gabe turned it into a videogame company, Valve was a plumbing syndicate, founded by two famous plumbers, but the syndicate went bankrupt thanks to Gabe wasting all their money on food. So, he decided to turn the old plumbing corporation into a merry land of fun, joy, and Russians. This was a drastic business transition but it earned the company a big enough profit to keep itself afloat while still being able to manage Gabe's monstrous appetite.
List of video games made by Valve[edit]
- Half-Life (1998)
- Half-Life: Opposing Force (1999)
- Counter-Strike (1999)
- Day of Defeat (1999)
- Team Fortress Classic (1999)
- Ricochet (2000)
- Half-Life: Blue Shift (2001)
- Half-Life: Decay (2001)
- Half Life 2 (2004)
- Half Life 2: Deathmatch (2004)
- Counter-Strike: Source (2005)
- Day of Defeat: Source (2005)
- Half Life 2: Episode 1 (2006)
- The Orange Box (2007)
- Half Life 2: Episode 2
- Portal
- Team Fortress 2
- Left 4 Dead (2008)
- Left 4 Dead 2 (2009)
- Alien Swarm (2010)
- Portal 2 (2011)
- Half Life 2: Episode 3 (it will never be released)
Likes[edit]
Dislikes[edit]
- Other FPS games
- Being called fat
- Being called "Gay Ben"
- PS3, until recently when, Chad Warden said he would take away his food if he didn't make Portal 2 on the PS3 better than on the 360.
- The number 3
Liked by[edit]
- Half-Life Fans
- Bronies
- His wife
Disliked by[edit]
- Other video game companies.
- Fans who want to play Half-Life 2: Episode 3 already.
Trivia[edit]
- To stop a Gay Ben, you must gently calm it down and press the Gaben.
- He has a wife and two diabetic children.
- He's also playable in Left 4 Dead.
- He is a playable character in Freak Fortress and Vs. Saxton Hale custom gamemodes for Team Fortress 2.
- He caused at least three quarters of every single earthquake from 1963 to date.
- TyrannosaurusReich loves him. Maybe even more than he loves Mai.
- Gabe used to own a Bowflex machine, but he ended up eating it whole.
- He has a secret desire to be Ringo Starr of The Beatles.
- Everytime you insult Gabe's girth, Episode 3 gets delayed another week. Think about that before you say something next time.
- Super Mario 64 taught him that games are art,and Doom taught him games are the future of entertainment.
- GLaDOS knows he's a procrastinator.
