Willy Wonka

This article is filed under Characters.

Willy Wonka is a crazy pedophile that owns a candy factory. This candy is alleged to be made out of little boys' nuts immersed into little girls' love juice but some say that it is a rare chocolate found in Bosnia.

Likes

• Sex With Children.
• Candy
• Child Pornography
• Taking people on psychotic boat rides.
• Making sure people get mindfucked.
• Wonking his willy.
• Yelling out "You Get Nothing!" and "You Lose!" to random people.
• Looking like a cross between Marilyn Manson and the Russian lady from Indiana Jones and the Temple of the Crystal Skull.

Dislikes

• Lex Luthor (Says that pedophilia is WRONG!!!!)
• Gum
• Sonic (Says that pedophilia is no-good, although it is very well known that Sonic himself is a pedophile.)
• Xavier
• Xavier: Renegade Angel
• Woody (His mission is to kill Buzz Lightyear, and Wonka doesn't want to see that happen.)
• Oompa Loompa Unions
• Heaven
• Jesus Christ
• Rick Astley

Liked By

• M. Bison (Claims that his candy is DELICIOUS!)
• Pedobear

Disliked By

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Here's his (in)famous chocolate bar.

• Lex Luthor
• The King (Willy Wonka's candy is causing children to not eat their dinner.)
• Phoenix Wright
• Hershey's
• Reese's
• Cadbury
• Rick Astley
• The Money you could be saving with GEICO.