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Pyro
From Chewiki Archive - YouChew:
1% Funny, 99% Hot Gas
This article is filed under Characters.
The Pyro is the arch-enemy of the Soldier. His hobbies including burning things, setting things on fire, and killing people with his flamethrower.
His dislikes include being blown up (which happens A LOT) and being called a woman/faggot.
Arsenal
Basic
- Flamethrower: Used short-range for burning his enemies to a crisp. Can also blow people back.
- Shotgun: Ugh, another shotgun...anyhow, used for slightly longer ranges.
- Axe: A novelty from his time as a failure of a firefighter, now for hacking open your ribcage instead of a locked door.
Updates
- Backburner: Replacing your Flamethrower, it does more damage when you burn the backs of enemies at the expense of your airblaster.
- Flare Gun: Can set distant foes aflame. Replaces the Shotgun.
- Axe-tinguisher: Does less damage normally then the Axe, but does 100% crit damage when they're on fire. You'd figure the barbed wire alone would do more damage, right?
Quotes
- AHAHAHAHAHA OOOAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH
- OW
- MMMMM MMMM MMMMMMMMOOOOKMM MM
Trivia
- Is one of the three only people Dan Hibiki has ever defeated, the others being Chuck Norris and Barry Scott.
- Was once killed by Soldier's Falcon Punch, only to be brought back to life because he's used to that sort of thing.
- Yearns to start a rock and roll band when TF2 is over, and can often be seen playing his axe like a guitar to shitty rap music.
- Medic has agreed to be violinist for Pyro's band, but first the never-ending war in team fortress must end.
- Has a potential immunity to Super AIDS. This has yet to be confirmed, however.
- Can perform a Gaudoken, as seen in some videos.
- Looks like Adrian Shepard.
- Is oftened debated if it is a man or woman under that baggy suit.
- Has sued the man in the gas mask from that lame-looking horror movie, My Bloody Valentine.
- Owns a pink purse, as shown in Team Fortress 2.
- If you get a kill with this class, people will burn up with anger pretty easily. Heh heh, get it? Burn up? Pyro? Heh heh, eehh...
- He's a flamer. Lol, another fire joke...
- Has the same voice actor as the Spy, ironically.
- Worked with the Demoman on the pyrotechnics for KISS in the '70s and early '80s.
A serious debate on the Pyro's gender
- SHE'S a flamer, you idiot.
- Oh hush, you don't know that. Nobody knows anymore.
- I know, but I won't tell you because I love confusing you.
- THERE ARE NO GIRLS ON THE INTERNET I WIN
- OH, YOU CLEVER BASTARD!!!
- Actually, it's a robot.
- I say that since the game doesn't allow us to see any of characters genitals, none of them have genders at all.
- ...Spy?
- INCORRECTION!!! Pyro is the Enema!!! (It's like enemy... only... messier!)
