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Difference between revisions of "Willy Wonka"

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[[Image:17230.gif|thumb|right|Willy's dancing to a ritual for hopes to find some new children to have around.]]
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Willy Wonka, commonly known as Willy [[masturbation|Wanker]], is a crazy [[Bowser|pedophile]] that owns a candy [[Fuck|fac]]tory. This candy is alleged to be made out of little boys' [[Balls|nuts]] immersed into little girls' [[Cum|love juice]] but some say that it is a rare [[cock|choc]]olate found in Bosnia. Still, some others think say that his candy is [[shit|crap]] coated LSD tablets.
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|name=Willy Wonka
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|image=17230.gif
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|caption=Willy's dancing to a ritual for hopes to find some new children to have around.
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|shows=[[Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory]]
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|sex=Male
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|dob={{Birth|1911}}
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|occupation=
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|nationality=German-American
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}}
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''Willy Wonka'', commonly known as ''Willy Wanker'', is a crazy [[pedophile]] that owns a candy [[fuck|factory]]. This candy is alleged to be made out of little boys' [[balls|nuts]] immersed into little girls' [[cum|love juice]] but some say that it is a rare [[chocolate]] found in Bosnia. Still, some others think say that his candy is [[shit|crap]] coated LSD tablets.
  
== Likes ==
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==Likes==
 
*Candy
 
*Candy
 
*Taking people on psychotic boat rides.
 
*Taking people on psychotic boat rides.
*Making sure people get mind[[fuck]]ed.
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*Making sure people get mindfucked.
*Yelling out ''"[[You]] Get Nothing!"'' and ''"[[Link: Faces of Evil|You Lose!]]"'' to random people.
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*Yelling out "[[You]] Get Nothing!" and "[[Link: The Faces of Evil|You Lose!]]" to random people.
*Looking like a cross between [[Marilyn Manson]] and [[Nostalgia Critic|the Russian lady from Indiana Jones and the Temple of the Crystal Skull.]]
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*Looking like a cross between [[Marilyn Manson]] and [[Nostalgia Critic|the Russian lady from Indiana Jones and the Temple of the Crystal Skull]].
 
*Seeing MacArthur Park burning in the dark.
 
*Seeing MacArthur Park burning in the dark.
 
*Sarcastically making you tell him more about random things (such as [[American Football|Tony Romo]] or the [[Macintosh|iPhone 5]])
 
*Sarcastically making you tell him more about random things (such as [[American Football|Tony Romo]] or the [[Macintosh|iPhone 5]])
  
== Dislikes ==
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==Hates==
*[[Lex Luthor]] (Says that pedophilia is [[WRONG]]!!!!)
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*[[Lex Luthor]] (Says that pedophilia is [[Wrong|WRONG]]!!!!)
 
*[[Cum|Gum]]
 
*[[Cum|Gum]]
*[[Sonic]] (Says that pedophilia is no-good, although it is very well known that Sonic himself is a pedophile.)
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*[[Sonic the Hedgehog|Sonic]] (Says that pedophilia is no-good, although it is very well known that Sonic himself is a pedophile.)
 
*Oompa Loompa Unions
 
*Oompa Loompa Unions
*[[Rick Roll|Rick Astley]]
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*[[Rick Astley]]
 
*Not having the recipes to his candies ever again.
 
*Not having the recipes to his candies ever again.
  
 
==Trivia==
 
==Trivia==
 
*His chocolate factory was once just a standard chocolate factory, until it one day closed, only to reopen as one of the weirdest places on earth.
 
*His chocolate factory was once just a standard chocolate factory, until it one day closed, only to reopen as one of the weirdest places on earth.
[[Image:Scam.jpg|thumb|right|Here's his (in)famous [[Chocolate Bars|chocolate bar.]]]]
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*His father was a [[Dr. Rabbit|dentist]] that prohibited candy. In fact, he one time burned all of Willy's Halloween candy, the [[Penis|dick]].
*His father was a [[Dr. Rabbit|dentist]] that prohibited candy. In fact, he one time burned all of Willy's Halloween candy, the [[dick]].
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*After this, he ran away from his home, claiming to go to such chocolaty places as [[Germany|Bavaria]] and the like.
**After this, he ran away from his home, claiming to go to such chocolaty places as [[Germany|Bavaria]] and the like.
 
 
*After realizing that he was growing old, he decided to give his chocolate factory to the winner out of the 5 golden tickets.
 
*After realizing that he was growing old, he decided to give his chocolate factory to the winner out of the 5 golden tickets.
  
 
==Quotes==
 
==Quotes==
*"I'm '''''EXTRAORDINARILY''''' busy, sir."
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*"I'm '''EXTRAORDINARILY''' busy, sir."
*"[[Lex Luthor|WRONG]], SIR, [[Lex Luthor|WRONG]]!"
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*"[[Wrong|WRONG]], SIR, [[Wrong|WRONG]]!"
*"...SO YOU GET...NOTHING!! YOU LOSE!! GOOD DAY, SIR!!"
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*"...SO YOU GET.. NOTHING!! YOU LOSE!! GOOD DAY, SIR!!"
*"You can suck [[Penis|'em]], and suck [[Dick|'em]], and suck [[Cock|'em]] and they'll never get smaller, never!"
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*"You can suck '[[Penis|em]], and suck '[[Penis|em]], and suck '[[Cock|em]] and they'll never get smaller, never!"
*"Strawberries taste like strawberries, ''schnoz'' berries taste like schnoz berries!"
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*"Strawberries taste like strawberries, schnoz berries taste like schnoz berries!"
 
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*"Are the fires of [[Hell]] a-glowing?"
==Wonkology==
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*"Don't touch that squirrel's nuts!"
Willy Wonka has his own religion, which was created on June 59th, 20XX. The rules of it are simple: Eat lots of candy, and hump 12 sheep a day. Because if its simplicity, and the popularity of sheep raping, the religion has many followers.
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[[Category:Characters]]
 
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[[Category:Dirty]]
==Notable Wonkologists==
 
*Charlie <s>Fucket</s> Bucket
 
*[[The Food Loving King]]
 
*[[You]]
 
*[[Link]]
 
*If I listed all the other notable people who were Wonkologists, the internet would probably explode.
 
 
[[Category:Pedophiles]]
 
[[Category:Pedophiles]]
 
[[Category:Business People]]
 
[[Category:Business People]]
{{Stub}}
 

Latest revision as of 00:44, 2 December 2024

CharNice.jpg This article is filed under Characters.

17230.gif

Willy's dancing to a ritual for hopes to find some new children to have around.

Name: Willy Wonka
Appears In: Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory
Sex: Male
DOB: 1911 (age 112–113)
Nationality: German-American

[[Category:Characters - Appears in Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory]]

Willy Wonka, commonly known as Willy Wanker, is a crazy pedophile that owns a candy factory. This candy is alleged to be made out of little boys' nuts immersed into little girls' love juice but some say that it is a rare chocolate found in Bosnia. Still, some others think say that his candy is crap coated LSD tablets.

Likes[edit]

Hates[edit]

  • Lex Luthor (Says that pedophilia is WRONG!!!!)
  • Gum
  • Sonic (Says that pedophilia is no-good, although it is very well known that Sonic himself is a pedophile.)
  • Oompa Loompa Unions
  • Rick Astley
  • Not having the recipes to his candies ever again.

Trivia[edit]

  • His chocolate factory was once just a standard chocolate factory, until it one day closed, only to reopen as one of the weirdest places on earth.
  • His father was a dentist that prohibited candy. In fact, he one time burned all of Willy's Halloween candy, the dick.
  • After this, he ran away from his home, claiming to go to such chocolaty places as Bavaria and the like.
  • After realizing that he was growing old, he decided to give his chocolate factory to the winner out of the 5 golden tickets.

Quotes[edit]

  • "I'm EXTRAORDINARILY busy, sir."
  • "WRONG, SIR, WRONG!"
  • "...SO YOU GET.. NOTHING!! YOU LOSE!! GOOD DAY, SIR!!"
  • "You can suck 'em, and suck 'em, and suck 'em and they'll never get smaller, never!"
  • "Strawberries taste like strawberries, schnoz berries taste like schnoz berries!"
  • "Are the fires of Hell a-glowing?"
  • "Don't touch that squirrel's nuts!"