Morshu

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You want it?

The man who is found in one of the Legend of Zelda CD-i games. His real name is Morshu Hundenbilg, but prefers to be called "Malfunctioning Bubba", in rememberence to is college years. Also mistaken for Tim Wonnacott.

He is known for selling lamp oil, rope, and bombs, among other "things". He also acts like a jerk to people who aren't rich enough to buy things. All payments for his wares must be made up front, since he can't give credit. He has a secret food stash in his shop. He doesn't sell the food so he can eat it himself. hence his large size. He was also the lead singer of The Cure for two months, although there is no record of this. He also is addicted to boobies.

Cultural Heritage: Germany

History

Morshu's parents, Franz and Eidelwiess Hundinbilg, immigrated to Koridai in 1936. Three years later, Edielwiess hundinberg gave birth to Morshu's older brother, Shastock. Shastock, however, had complications with the Spanish flu, and died due to an overdose of penicillin at 30 years old.

Trying to start a family again (Franz and Eidelwiess were only 12 when they were married, as per Gamelon custom), they then gave birth to Morshu. Morshu, early in his life, showed a great capacity for wild hand gesticulations and dramatic close-ups. Seeing the potential, his parents put Morshu in an apprenticeship with the then-leading merchant of Koridai, Goronu.

Morshu, however, soon grew so great in shop-keeping prowess, that he overcame Goronu, who grew exceedingly jealous of Morshu's skills. Goronu soon came to Ganon, whom he traded his soul to for the ultimate shop-keeping powers. Using his newfound strength, Goronu soon attacked Morshu's shop in an attempt to rid himself of the troublesome pupil. However, on the way, Goronu got jock itch, and had to leave in order to deal with the tremendous pain. Morshu, seeing his oppurtunity, opened up a chain of stores in Goronu's absence, becoming the third wealthiest man in Koridai (behind Harlequin and Gwonam). In 1967, he opened Morshu's Dinner Palace, which became a very successful restaurant, catering to the then college seniors, The King, and Duke Onkled. The place was well known for it's well cooked meals and Morshu's great singing. It closed in 1982, when the techno craze started, because Morshu was afraid to use anything that was a computer. He sold the restaurant to some guy named Rick for 200,000 ruppees and 50 cans of lamp oil. With his newfound wealth, Morshu continually lead an opulent lifestyle, feasting refularly on Arpagos eggs, which make great ommelettes, and pure fat. He also gained even more income by regularly supplying the one thing The King always strived for: Child pornography.

Unfortunately for Morshu, the KBG, upon finding Morshu directly linked to the child pornography ring in Koridai, descended upon Morshu and was able to foreclose most of his chain stores. To compund to his problems, Goronu recovered from jock itch, and was "itching" for revenge. Morshu, faced with so many problems, had to declare bankruptcy and foreclose on all of his properties.

By the time Link reaches Koridai, Morshu is a shadow of his former self. Only controlling the market on Lamp Oil, Rope, Bombs, et all, he is in a dire state, so much that he is no longer able to give credit, due to Goronu's strong-men continually harassing him. He says that Link must pay full-price for all goods, but he really is willing to take anything, any contribution Link offers.

Upon the defeat of Goronu by Link, Morshu is able to open a parlor on the side to earn a little bit of extra income. It turns to be a great success, though only after making the parlor an underground meeting-place for Gwonam's drug cartels. Morshu cries himself to sleep every night.

Morshu finally passed away in 1997 due to heart problems contracted from cholosterol problems. He is survived by 16 children out of wedlock. He also has a distant cousin named I. Fleecem. The two were good friends back in the 1950's. Morshu worked as Fleecems apprentice and learned all about how to run a good buisness. Fleecem however made the mistake of offering people credit instead of full payments. In 1947, he sold the King lamp oil, rope, dinner, and a ship on credit. 61 years later, the King still refuses to pay. This event is partly why Morshu could never give credit, as he thought that the King would refuse to pay him as well.

In 2006, he was brought back to life by Mama Luigi, who used Spaghetti to bring him back. Don't ask me how it made alive again. Mama Luigi wanted a bagel from his store. He responded with "There in aisle 7, near the ropes".

In 2009, he asked Dr. Rabbit if he could sell Colgate toothpaste at his store. Dr. Rabbit replied "NO."

Morshu in Sonic Unleashed?

An Ice Cream seller, where the character known as Chip was attracted to its ice cream, looks A LOT like Morshu. Many other people spectulated that the Ice Cream seller IS Morshu, but with a little different job, and much different products. Others who believe that it IS Morshu, thinks that he still sell bombs.

Also Known as

• Shopkeep
• Shopkeeper
• Goronu, due to a mistake
• Fat Man
• Dumbass
• IAMSHOPKEEPER
• The MMMMM Guy
• Master Cheif

BOMBS!? You want it?

See Also

• Link: Faces of Evil
• Goronu
• Ushrom, the shopkeeper of Zelda: The Wand of Gamelon