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SEGA

From Chewiki Archive - YouChew: 1% Funny, 99% Hot Gas
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A game company that made Sonic the Hedgehog, and other stuff. Also Nintendo's former rival. Their console "Genesis"/Mega Drive was a success, but the rest, although containing some excellent titles, didn't sell as well. Although some of their games are quite good, most people think that they do Sonic and nothing else. At least in the west, this isn't entirely an inaccurate description.

*Ring sound* or SSSSHHHHHEEEEGGUUUHHH

Games Made or Published By Sega[edit]

  • Sonic The Hedgehog (Obviously.)
  • Super Monkey Ball
  • NiGHTS
  • Samba de Amigo
  • Virtua Fighter
  • Phantasy Star
  • Crazy Taxi
  • Space Harrier
  • Ristar
  • Dynamite Headdy
  • Valkyria Chronicles
  • Sakura Wars
  • Skies of Arcadia
  • House of the Dead
  • Space Channel 5
  • Streets of Rage
  • Golden Axe
Kanye West beleves that the Sega Genesis was better than God's genesis.
  • Altered Beast
  • Alex Kidd
  • Fantasy Zone
  • Billy Hatcher and the Giant Egg
  • Toejam and Earl
  • Comix Zone
  • The Ooze
  • The Bleach DS and Wii games (they only published them, however)
  • Sega Superstars
    • Sega Superstars Tennis
    • Sonic and Sega All-Stars Racing
  • Shenmue
  • Yakuza
  • Jet Set Radio
  • Illbleed
  • Fighters Megamix
  • Beach Spikers
  • Every Total War Game since Rome: Barbarian Invasion
  • MadWorld
  • The Conduit
  • Bayonetta
  • Vanquish
  • Napple Tale
  • Daytona USA
  • Initial D Arcade Stage
  • Bonanza Bros.

Trivia[edit]

  • AGES is SEGA backwards.
    • To be this good takes AGES. To be this good takes SEGA.
  • Pronounced Say-GA to most bar Australians for some reason...
  • Despite their most recent amounts of suckage, they are hosting the top three anticipated games for the Nintendo Wii for 2009. These three games are The House of The Dead: Overkill, MadWorld, and The Conduit.
  • Joseph Stalin was considering hiring them to make his propaganda. However, after he died, he couldn't do shit.
  • They do what Nintendon't.
  • They actually made fruit machines in the '50s as Service Games which they actually still work today and can be valueable to own.
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Sega's famous mascot.
  • The consoles that they made before their unexpected fall were the Sega SG-1000/SG-1000 II, the Sega Mark III, the Sega SC-3000/SC-3000H, the Sega Master System, the Sega Genesis/Mega Drive (Also includes the Sega CD and the Sega 32X add-ons.), the Sega Game Gear, the Sega Nomad (Which was a portable Sega Genesis/Mega Drive.), the Sega Saturn, and the Sega Dreamcast (Which also included the Sega VMU {Visual Memory Unit}, which was the included memory card that could also download some special games for the Sega Dreamcast.).
  • Once got Michael Jackson to be in their propaganda.
  • Also once got some normal-type of person named Segata Sanshiro for some more propaganda.
  • Has had the most consoles of any non-Nintendo company, none of which have ever beaten Nintendo (Although they were close with the Sega Genesis in the US And were even successful in Europe and Brazil with the Master System and Mega Drive. The SEGA Saturn even did better than the N64 in Japan).
  • They were bought by the pachinko company Sammy and the companies have merged to form Sega Sammy Holdings. Therefore, Sonic shall be a guest fighter in the next Guilty Gear.
  • Despite not making any more home consoles, SEGA made several arcade boards, including the NAOMI board (which is the board that Marvel Vs. Capcom 2 ran on). Sammy (mentioned above) would later make another version of the NAOMI called the Atomiswave (which SNK used to make Samurai Shodown VI, Metal Slug 6 and The King of Fighters XI among others). The hardware would see a final lease of life in the SEGA Dreamcast allowing it to see near-flawless ports of SEGA's NAOMI games.
  • According to Kirk Cameron, 61% of the professors in college still play the Sega Genesis.
  • They have a nonexistant city called "Segaville", where the longest road in the entire world has a sign that says "Segaville Next Right" multiple times in a row.
  • It's probably not a coincidence that they made a series that glorifies the yakuza after they got bought out by the biggest pachinko company in Japan.
The opening screen for Michael Jackson's Moonwalker game for the Sega Genesis.
Sega actually using a normal person named Segata Sanshiro for some of their propaganda.