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Customer Service

From Chewiki Archive - YouChew: 1% Funny, 99% Hot Gas
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Name: Customer Service
Appears In: Kirby
Sex: Male
DOB: 1987 (age 35–36)
Occupation(s): Spokesperson of N.M.E.
Played By: Dan Green

Customer Service is that purple guy with green hair and bronze sunshades who tries to sell MONSTAHS to King Dedede, because that's what they do best at N.M.E. He is known for his overly-detailed art style, and his rude behavior: Some pranks he has pulled on Dedede include cutting communications while Dedede is talking mid sentence, sending him the wrong monster or something that isn't a monster at all (like a Plant Encyclopedia), not responding to Dedede when he talks, overcharging for monsters, or even just denying him service in general.


Customer Service was created in 1987 from the same code as Max Headroom. He was created for N.M.E. as a low-cost solution to customer service.


  • "How can I help you, King Dedede?"
  • "That's what we do best at N.M.E."
  • "Fuck You, King Dedede!"
  • "I gotta say, D-man, you're lookin' fly today!"

Legal issues[edit]

  • In 1989, he was the subject of a lawsuit where N.M.E. was sued by Edison Carter and Network 23 over usage of his image. The judge ruled in favour of N.M.E., and Network 23 was forced to pay legal fees to N.M.E.


  • Torturing poor Dedede
  • Plant encyclopedias
  • Paperweights
  • Sunshades with the Roman numeral II embedded in the lenses
  • Coca-Cola


Is Liked By[edit]

  • No one in particular
This is not Customer Service, though Customer Service was based off of him.

Is Disliked By[edit]


  • Is actually a short motherfucker.
  • His butt chin has eaten an eraser, some coins and a shaver.
  • His suit was bought from a thrift store.
  • The green hair is from acid stains when he was 2 that somehow didn't burn off his hair.
  • Went through plastic surgery.
  • His brother is Max Headroom, but they both hate each other.
  • He is the Joker in an alternate dimension.
  • For certain subgames in Kirby's Mass Attack, he and Escargoon both appear in them. This means they're finally moving on up towards being actual Kirby characters!!