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The Book Trilogy

From Chewiki Archive - YouChew: 1% Funny, 99% Hot Gas

The Book Trilogy is a series of three sacred books that originate from the beginning of time. Each one serves a different purpose, and all possess bizarre properties.

The Books

  • The Enclosed Instruction Book: This was the first, and most significant. The pages of the book describe the creation of the universe, Uctions, Anti-Uctions, and primordial entities. It serves as a bible, and the contents of the book have been copied and sold much like the bible. Unlike these copies, however, the original Enclosed Instruction Book possesses unimaginable amounts of power within its binding and pages, and Fat Mario is the chosen wielder of it. He only uses it when absolutely necessary, of course.
  • The Book of Koridai: This book possesses blank pages, and its power lies in its ability to suck up evil entities like Ganon and trap them within the pages. However, Ganon refers to the book as The Pit, suggesting that the book doesn't trap them, but instead outright kills them. It currently lies in a shrine in Koridai, waiting for Ganon to try anything evil.
  • ???: The mysterious third book is unknown, lost to the annals of time. It is rumored to have similar properites to the Book of Koridai. It is also rumored that someone located the book, and magically modified it for their own purposes. That same someone also sometimes wants to have sex with this book. What an unlucky book.

Recently, there have been a rumored fourth book that's been discovered by some old bitch. The rumored fourth book is called "The Book of Ages". This book is said to hold every detail of history that's found ever since time was first introduced to the planet Earth. It's been said that if the pages get ripped out or if a part inside gets erased, then those events would also disappear. It's said to be more powerful than the three books above you combined. Of course, that book could be the name for the third book that said someone owns. Still, be careful with it if you discover it.