SpongeBob SquarePants (character)

This article is filed under Characters.

Look how gay he looks.

SpongeBob is a retarded, bisexual sea sponge who lives in a pineapple under the sea.

Sinister sir.

{{#ev:youtube|UbiEAyHY5WQ|320}}

Life As A Hero

• He's gone on a quest to become The Overture, which he ended up succeeding. He eventually lost the title to Super Macho Man.

Likes

• Patrick Star
• Sandy
• The love triangle between him, Patrick and Sandy.
• Mr. Krabs
• Squidward Tentacles
• Jellyfishing
• Blowing Bubbles
• The Krab of Krustiness
• Krabby Patties
• Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy

People Who Are Better At Making Krabby Patties Than Him

• Jim
• Kirby
• Captain Falcon
• God
  • Jesus

SpongeBob shows us the tragic side effects of Magic Drugs.

• King Harkinian
• Soundwave

Signs Of Being Gay

Though this theory has been clearly contradicted, these scenes actually cause the battle of his sexuality to go on.

• He once gave a valentines gift to Patrick.
• He hugs Patrick on several occasions.
• He giggled when a chef kissed him on the cheek.
• In one episode, he and Patrick shared a very special moment after Spongebob was released from prison.

Quotes

• "It's big, scary, and pink!"
• "I've been saving it in my pocket for us to share!"
• "I don't think you can be the mom, Patrick, because you never wear a shirt."
• "Stare at Patrick!"
• "There's no shower at work!"
• "See you're on top this time."
• "All alone with Mermaid Man's belt."
• "I'm a dirty boy!"
• "It popped..."
• "The sky had a baby from my cereal box!"
• "Well I see Mr. Krabs' zipper is undone!"
• "We've been speckledorfed!"
• "We've been Ganondorfed!"
• "It's normal sized and fully functional!"
• "Have you finished those errands? Have you finished those errands? Have you finished those errands?"
• "Look at me, Gary! I'm... NAKEEEDD!"
• "That didn't help at all!"

Error creating thumbnail: File missing

What has been seen cannot be unseen...

Trivia

• Flunked out of high school, which is why he works at a fast food restaurant.
• Also fails in Driving School regularly.
• His IQ is an imaginary number.
• In the decade that he has worked at the Krusty Krab, he has never had a promotion.
• Is married to Sandy (at least he thinks he is).
• Reproduces by budding.
• Once made a sweater for Squidward made of his eyelashes. When that failed, he made another made of tears.
• He is so weak that he once had to have someone else lift his drink off of his hand so he could move it. He can't even lift up a stick with two marshmallows attached to it (but can somehow drag Patrick's rock).
  • He is, however, stronger than Oogtar.
• He can rip his pants on command. However, he overused this joke and lost his friends, which turned him emo. He was cured of his emoness by playing a guitar made of sand.