Fred Phelps

This article is filed under Characters.

He looks pretty ridiculous in that windbreaker.

God hates America, vile land of the sodomite damned. It is the most ungrateful and the most arrogant, anti-God nation that ever existed. Amen.

Things done for humanity

Let it be known that Fred Phelps has done a great deal for mankind. He has stopped Ganon many a time and has slain many a Vice President. He will also be in the upcoming Terminator movie.

Likes

• God
• Jesus Christ
• His cult.

Dislikes

• Gays
• Jews
• The Roman Catholic Church
• Sweden
• Ireland
• America
• Canada
• The United Kingdom
• Bill O'Reilly
• Australia
• George Carlin
• Everything

Trivia

• Every person who dies splits Hell wide open.
• Jon Stewart's comedian sidekick is WHEEL GATOR.
• He wants free popcorn.
• YOU'RE GONNA EAT YOUR BABIES.
• He thinks every problem in America is due to buttsex.
• Uses homosexuality as a scapegoat to pretty much everything
• Is sexist by telling his wife to "Get back in the kitchen".
• His son is NOT Michael Phelps, the nine-time gold medal winner in the Beijing 2008 Olympics.
• He is banned from entering the United Kingdom.
• He is a major Dick.
• He and his followers actually picket numerous funerals, mainly ones of fallen soldiers, Ronald Reagan, Pope John Paul II, and Al Gore's father, and says that these people are now burning in hell. Now that is a truly evil act.
• Jesus Christ looks-down upon him, for justifying hate in his and God's name.
  • He is certainly going to hell.
• Bandit Keith also disapproves of him, since he hates America.

Offspring

• Fred Phelps Jr.
• Mark Phelps (disowned)
• Margie Phelps
• Shirley Phelps-Roper
• Katherine Phelps (Disowned)
• Nathan "Nate" Phelps (Disowned)
• Jonathon B. Phelps
• Rebekah Phelps-Davis
• Elizabeth Phelps
• Dorotha Phelps (Disowned)
• Timothy Phelps
• Rachel Phelps
• Abigail Phelps

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