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Donkey Kong

From Chewiki Archive - YouChew: 1% Funny, 99% Hot Gas

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Name: Donkey Kong
Appears In: Donkey Kong Country
Sex: Male
Occupation(s): Protector of Kongo-Bongo and the Crystal Coconut

CharNice.jpg This article is filed under Characters.

Donkey Kong is one of the first video game characters to ever appear on a Nintendo game. He was originally a bad guy, but that was really Cranky Kong.

His Part in Youtube Poop

Donkey Kong starred in his own TV series with the same name as his first SNES game, Donkey Kong Country. This show is commonly used as a source by some, like Cortes.

The Fake DK

The ape we all know and love is in fact Donkey Kong Jr. He first appeared rescuing his father from Mario. He persued his own career as a teacher while his papa got smacked again.

Donkey Kong being gang-raped by some pig things. Or showing off a new hairstyle. One of those two.

Jr. soon grew up in 1994 with Donkey Kong Country. The original Kong was now old and wrinkly, and is married (though that wasn't found out until DKC2). But what Jr. didn't realize was that King K. Rool, the supposed villain of the trilogy, happens to be in Cranky Kong's ropes. Nobody knew that until some people played the sequel and the sequel after that.

Family Lines

Candy Kong: Girlfriend of Donkey Kong

Chunky Kong: Kiddy Kong's Brother

Diddy Kong: Nephew of Donkey Kong (Little Buddy)

Dixie Kong: Girlfriend of Diddy Kong (Little Buddy's Fuck Buddy)

Lanky Kong: Relative to the Manky Kongs

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Donkey Kong on a bad morning.

Kiddy Kong: Chunky Kong's Brother

Tiny Kong: Sister of Dixie Kong

Trivia

  • He likes the Banana Cream Pie. (BarnabasB proved it.)
  • NintyScreen approves of him.
  • SnakeManEXE, however, does not approve of DK, or this article.
  • He sometimes is seen as a rapper, as well as some sort of a strange engrish type thing with King K. Rool. (Who wants no news, no calls, and no tyranny until tomorrow.)
  • Said that he had AIDS once.
  • He also said that he's got two cokes, but Diddy Kong's slick with that.
  • He was once the main guy that was being sued by Universal Studios for simply having a name that was similar to the name King Kong. Donkey Kong would eventually win this case, and would then stay with Nintendo with all the bananas that he could eat until he decided to retire. (Wait, What? He didn't retire, stupid.)
  • HE'S THE FUCKING FINAL BOSS IN FUCKING PUNCH OUT!! FOR THE FUCKING NINTENDO FUCKING WII!!! WHAT THE FUCK?!?!?! WHAT IN THE FUCK IS HE FUCKING DOING THERE???
  • ^ HE'S BEATING YOUR ASS, THAT'S WHAT