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Difference between revisions of "Squidward Tentacles"

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{{Char}}
 
{{Char}}
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[[Image:Skidward 1.jpg|right|thumb|Squidward loves being all alooooooooone.]]
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{{CharBox
−
 
+
|name=Squidward Michael Tentacles
−
==Overview==
+
|image=Skidward_1.jpg
−
 
+
|shows=Spongebob Squarepants
−
Squidward is a six-armed octopus who lives under the sea with his neighbors, [[Spongebob]], [[Patrick]], and Sidney Crosby. He has worked the full-time register at the Krusty Krab for over thirty <s>thousand</s> years, despite hating everyone around him, and secretly grows [[Magic drugs|marijuana]] in his basement. He also sports a variety of musical instruments, but prefers to excerise his sexual tendencies with them as opposed to actually play them.  
+
|noaddshows=yes
 +
|age=65
 +
|sex=Male
 +
|occupation=Cashier
 +
|cast=Rodger Bumpass
 +
}}
 +
Squidward is a six-armed octopus who lives under the sea with his neighbors, [[Spongebob]], [[Patrick]], and [[Bill Cosby|Sidney Crosby]], all of which he acts like an asshole towards. He has worked the full-time register at the Krusty Krab for over thirty <s>thousand</s> years, despite hating everyone around him, and secretly grows [[Magic drugs|marijuana]] in his basement. He also sports a variety of musical instruments, but prefers to excerise his sexual tendencies with them as opposed to actually play them.  
  
 
Squidward is also a chronic diabetic, and a carrier of the Avian Flu. He was once a harborer of over fifteen [[AIDS|STDs]] but survived by cutting his genitals off.
 
Squidward is also a chronic diabetic, and a carrier of the Avian Flu. He was once a harborer of over fifteen [[AIDS|STDs]] but survived by cutting his genitals off.
Line 11: Line 17:
  
 
==History==
 
==History==
 +
Squidward was born on July 31st, 1945 to siamese parents. From an early age, he showed a heavy interest in music and substance abuse. He spent days at a time dabbling in both of these hobbies, and created his first symphony at the age of six. Short on money, his parents often loaned him out to band directors and hairy fetishists.
  
−
Squidward was born on July 31st, 1931 to siamese parents. From an early age, he showed a heavy interest in music and substance abuse. He spent days at a time dabbling in both of these hobbies, and created his first symphony at the age of six. Short on money, his parents often loaned him out to band directors and hairy fetishists.
+
In 1950, his father listed in the war and inevitably took his mother with him, and they both died in a Bombing. The then-orphaned Squidward set out on his own to see the world. Much to his chagrin, however, his parents wished to have themselves buried with all their money, and Squidward was left without a cent to his name. Consequently, he never left Bikini Bottom. In an attempt to get by, Squidward pawned off all of his possessions, liquidated his shares of [[uctions]], and actually boarded with Nigel Thornberry for several years. Nigel was, at the time, filming an undersea expedition. Things went well for awhile, but starting getting patchy when Nigel began to harvest Squidward's internal organs while he slept.  
  
−
In 1941, he father listed in the war and inevitably took his mother with him, and they both died in the Dresden Bombing. The then-orphaned Squidward set out on his own to see the world. Much to his chagrin, however, his parents wished to have themselves buried with all their money, and Squidward was left without a cent to his name. Consequently, he never left Bikini Bottom. In an attempt to get by, Squidward pawned off all of his possessions, liquidated his shares of [[uctions]], and actually boarded with Nigel Thornberry for several years. Nigel was, at the time, filming an undersea expedition. Things went well for awhile, but starting getting patchy when Nigel began to harvest Squidward's internal organs while he slept.  
+
In 1971, Squidward was hired off the street by [[Mr. Krabs]], and became the first and only cashier of the then-fledgling Krusty Krab restaurant. The money began to roll in, and he was finally able to buy a home and concentrate on his sexual fetishes, as well as his clarinet, which to this day he is absolutely terrible at playing. He now lives in an Easter Island head, and still works at the Krusty Krab, despite never getting a single raise in the thirty-odd years he's worked there.
  
−
In [[Philadelphia|1976]], Squidward was hired off the street by [[Mr. Krabs]], and became the first and only cashier of the then-fledgling Krusty Krab restaurant. The money began to roll in, and he was finally able to buy a home and concentrate on his sexual fetishes, as well as his clarinet, which to this day he is absolutely terrible at playing. He now lives in an Easter Island head, and still works at the Krusty Krab, despite never getting a single raise in the thirty-odd years he's worked there.
+
Recently, Mr. Krabs turned the restaurant into a hotel called the Krusty Towers, where Squidward was forced to work as a bellhop and reluctantly fulfill the demands of the guests. He eventually quit his job and then ironically vacationed there to make Mr. Krabs fulfill ''his'' ridiculous requests, such as making cookies like his mother. One day in October 2009, though, Squidward blew up the Krusty Towers simply by ringing the bell.  And that was the end of the Musty Skyscrapers.
  
 
==Likes==
 
==Likes==
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*Alone...
 
*Alone...
 
*Alone...
 
*Alone...
−
*[[Masturbation|Sexually pleasing himself]] with exotic vegetables.
 
 
*[[Masturbation|Sexually pleasing himself]] with his clarinet.
 
*[[Masturbation|Sexually pleasing himself]] with his clarinet.
−
*[[Masturbation|sexually pleasing himself]] with [[Money|expensive]] [[shit|stinky]] [[Japan|imported]] [[Cheese]].
 
 
*His own jokes.
 
*His own jokes.
−
*[[Money|Expensive]] [[Shit|Stinky]] [[Japan|Imported]] [[Cheese]] (especially [[bad]] [[Italy|Italian]] [[Rocky Balboa|provolone]]).
+
*Pie
−
*Pie.
+
*[[Money|Expensive]], [[Shit|stinky]], [[Japan|imported]] [[cheese]] (especially [[bad]] [[Italy|Italian]] [[Rocky Balboa|provolone]]).
−
*And his own pie factory.
+
*Canned bread
−
*Canned Bread
+
*[[Cum]]ming for your [[penis|pickle]].
 +
* Nepotisim
  
 
==Dislikes==
 
==Dislikes==
−
*[[Spongebob Squarepants (Character)|Spongebob Squarepants]] [[Image:Spongebob is staring at Squidward's ass..png|thumb|Spongebob is looking at Squidward's [[ass]].]]
+
[[Image:Squidward.jpg|thumb|right|Squidward the cutie-pie. So innocent. :3]]
 +
*[[Spongebob Squarepants (Character)|Spongebob Squarepants]]
 
*[[Patrick Star]]
 
*[[Patrick Star]]
 
*[[Mr. Krabs]]
 
*[[Mr. Krabs]]
 
*Sandy Cheeks
 
*Sandy Cheeks
 
*Pearl Krabs
 
*Pearl Krabs
−
*His own job.
+
*His own job and life.
−
*His own life.
+
*Bombs
−
*The terrible fish-eating clam in the back yard.
+
*The terrible man-eating clam in the backyard.
 
*When Patrick destroys his [[cheese]].
 
*When Patrick destroys his [[cheese]].
 +
*Having too many alones here.
  
 
==Quotes==
 
==Quotes==
−
 
+
*"Thank [[you]], thank [[you]]."
−
*"Thank you, thank you."
 
−
*"GET OUT OF MY GOD-DAMN HOUSE!!"
 
 
*"I've finally found a place where I can be all.... aloooooooone."
 
*"I've finally found a place where I can be all.... aloooooooone."
−
*"[[NO|Does this look unsure to you?]]
+
*"[[No|Does ''this'' look ''un''sure to]] [[you]]?"
 
*"[[Yes|What do I have to do, eat one out of the garbage?]]"
 
*"[[Yes|What do I have to do, eat one out of the garbage?]]"
 
*"I just had to say garbage. But, OKAY!"
 
*"I just had to say garbage. But, OKAY!"
−
*"IT'S NOT MY BIRTHDAY."
+
*"IT'S ''[[NO]]T'' MY '''''BIRTHDAAAYYYY!!!'''''"
 
*"Eh-ha, eh-ha, eh-ha."
 
*"Eh-ha, eh-ha, eh-ha."
−
*"After all, [[AIDS]] is a deadly, incurable disease. But no matter how you come to judge Charles Wheeler and his partners' unethical, moral, and inhuman terms, the fact of the matter is, when they fired Andrew Beckett because he had AIDS, ''they broke the law''."
+
*"[[No]], [[Patrick Star|Patrick]], mayonnaise is ''[[no]]t'' an instrument."
−
*[[NO|"I'm a pretty girl]]."
 
 
*"Horseradish isn't an instrument either!"
 
*"Horseradish isn't an instrument either!"
−
*"AAH! SQUILLIAM! AAAAHHH!!"
+
[[Image:unamused.jpg|thumb|300px|Squidward is unamused with this article.]]
 
*"AAH! THAT WOULD BE MY BAND!"
 
*"AAH! THAT WOULD BE MY BAND!"
−
*"I think I'll commit suicide tomorrow..."
+
*"OH [[NO]], HE'S HOT!"
−
 
+
*"Barnacle head."
−
==Suicide Attempt==
+
*"''Future... future... future...''"
−
On December 27, 2009 Squidward tried to kill himself by hanging himself while filming. They have everything on film. He Used Wires to hang himself. He Did it because he [[raped]] old ladies.
+
*"They couldn't tell an oboe from an elbow! Heh-heh. ''ELBOW''."
 +
*"Yes, SpongeBob, I have finished those errands."
 +
*"Oh, my aching tentacles."
 +
*"I'll give him 11 minutes."
 +
*"Oh, look! It's [[me]], SpongeBob, right here in the open!"
 +
*"He's [[no]]t in my thoughts."
 +
*"DON'T [[YOU]] TWO HAVE ANY BRAINS!?!?"
 +
*"I've [[Cum|come]] for [[you]]r [[penis|pickle]]..."
 +
*"Steal [[you]]r soul."
 +
*"I wonder if a fall from this height would be enough to kill [[me]]."
 +
*"FOUR WAY!"
 +
*"Ahhh, the sweet smell of pay day!"
 +
*"Why is it whenever I'm having fun, it's wrong?"
 +
*"And WHY aren't [[you]] in uniform?"
 +
*"This lemon has three seeds in it! THAT'S AN ODD NUMBER!!! I can't eat anything odd numbered!"
 +
*"Is this where the line starts?"
 +
*"That idea just might be crazy enough... TO GET US ALL KILLED!!"
 +
*"I think my heart just stopped."
 +
*"In case [[you]] forgot, here's how things work: ''[[I]]'' order the food, ''[[you]]'' ''cook'' the food, and the customer ''gets'' the food. We do that, for forty years, and then we die."
 +
*"Squidward... '''''TORTELLINI!?'''''"
 +
*"Will [[I]] ''ever'' win?"
 +
*"He made [[me]] provide excellent service!"
 +
*"Hey, Frank."
 +
*"Well, he's handsome, I'll give him ''that''!"
 +
*"Too bad that didn't kill [[me]]."
 +
*"Don't they know I'm busy spoiling myself?"
 +
*"Oh, puh-lease! I have [[no]] soul! '''*evil laugh*'''"
 +
*"SHUT YOUR HALF-WIT PIEHOLES!"
 +
*"HIS FAVORITE UNDERPANTS!"
 +
*"I call it Bold and Brash!"
  
 
==Usage==
 
==Usage==
−
{{VidCaption|vkJ4Ab1mcEE|8-D}}
+
Squidward was more prevalent in YouTube Poop before [[Viacom]] started cracking down heavily on the unauthorized usage of Spongebob-related material. However, as aforementioned, he has attained meme status via the "Does this look unsure to you?" image as well as through the aptly-titled "Squidward" video on YouTube.
−
 
 
−
 
 
−
 
 
−
Squidward was more prevalent in YouTube Poop before Viacom started cracking down heavily on the unauthorized usage of Spongebob-related material. However, as aforementioned, he has attained meme status via the "Does this look unsure to you?" image as well as through the aptly-titled "Squidward" video on YouTube.  
 
  
 +
==The Fad==
 +
{{vid|7Yl9e0XqCxc}}
 +
"SQUIDWARD" was also the name of a 10-second video created by [[ChristopherCooler]] in late 2008. It consists of a screencapture of Squidward making a silly face from the episode "Prehibernation Week", which then has a variety of visual effects applied. This started a [[fad]], with many people making their own copycat videos. The original has since been removed from Youtube, but reuploaded by other users.
  
 +
The music used in these videos is "Gentle Breeze", a track from the Nintendo DS game ''Trauma Center: Under the Knife 2'' composed by Shoji Meguro.
 
[[Category:Characters - Male]]
 
[[Category:Characters - Male]]
 +
[[Category:Characters - Appears in SpongeBob SquarePants]]
 +
[[Category:Nickelodeon]]
 +
[[Category:Emo Characters]]

Latest revision as of 15:00, 12 January 2017

CharNice.jpg This article is filed under Characters.

Error creating thumbnail: File missing

Name: Squidward Michael Tentacles
Appears In: Spongebob Squarepants
Sex: Male
Age: 65
Occupation(s): Cashier
Played By: Rodger Bumpass

Squidward is a six-armed octopus who lives under the sea with his neighbors, Spongebob, Patrick, and Sidney Crosby, all of which he acts like an asshole towards. He has worked the full-time register at the Krusty Krab for over thirty thousand years, despite hating everyone around him, and secretly grows marijuana in his basement. He also sports a variety of musical instruments, but prefers to excerise his sexual tendencies with them as opposed to actually play them.

Squidward is also a chronic diabetic, and a carrier of the Avian Flu. He was once a harborer of over fifteen STDs but survived by cutting his genitals off.

Squidward had also attained (forced) meme status at the YouChewPoop forums under the name Skidward from an old thread of the same name started by MrGenericMan.

History[edit]

Squidward was born on July 31st, 1945 to siamese parents. From an early age, he showed a heavy interest in music and substance abuse. He spent days at a time dabbling in both of these hobbies, and created his first symphony at the age of six. Short on money, his parents often loaned him out to band directors and hairy fetishists.

In 1950, his father listed in the war and inevitably took his mother with him, and they both died in a Bombing. The then-orphaned Squidward set out on his own to see the world. Much to his chagrin, however, his parents wished to have themselves buried with all their money, and Squidward was left without a cent to his name. Consequently, he never left Bikini Bottom. In an attempt to get by, Squidward pawned off all of his possessions, liquidated his shares of uctions, and actually boarded with Nigel Thornberry for several years. Nigel was, at the time, filming an undersea expedition. Things went well for awhile, but starting getting patchy when Nigel began to harvest Squidward's internal organs while he slept.

In 1971, Squidward was hired off the street by Mr. Krabs, and became the first and only cashier of the then-fledgling Krusty Krab restaurant. The money began to roll in, and he was finally able to buy a home and concentrate on his sexual fetishes, as well as his clarinet, which to this day he is absolutely terrible at playing. He now lives in an Easter Island head, and still works at the Krusty Krab, despite never getting a single raise in the thirty-odd years he's worked there.

Recently, Mr. Krabs turned the restaurant into a hotel called the Krusty Towers, where Squidward was forced to work as a bellhop and reluctantly fulfill the demands of the guests. He eventually quit his job and then ironically vacationed there to make Mr. Krabs fulfill his ridiculous requests, such as making cookies like his mother. One day in October 2009, though, Squidward blew up the Krusty Towers simply by ringing the bell. And that was the end of the Musty Skyscrapers.

Likes[edit]

Dislikes[edit]

Error creating thumbnail: File missing
Squidward the cutie-pie. So innocent. :3

Quotes[edit]

Error creating thumbnail: File missing
Squidward is unamused with this article.
  • "AAH! THAT WOULD BE MY BAND!"
  • "OH NO, HE'S HOT!"
  • "Barnacle head."
  • "Future... future... future..."
  • "They couldn't tell an oboe from an elbow! Heh-heh. ELBOW."
  • "Yes, SpongeBob, I have finished those errands."
  • "Oh, my aching tentacles."
  • "I'll give him 11 minutes."
  • "Oh, look! It's me, SpongeBob, right here in the open!"
  • "He's not in my thoughts."
  • "DON'T YOU TWO HAVE ANY BRAINS!?!?"
  • "I've come for your pickle..."
  • "Steal your soul."
  • "I wonder if a fall from this height would be enough to kill me."
  • "FOUR WAY!"
  • "Ahhh, the sweet smell of pay day!"
  • "Why is it whenever I'm having fun, it's wrong?"
  • "And WHY aren't you in uniform?"
  • "This lemon has three seeds in it! THAT'S AN ODD NUMBER!!! I can't eat anything odd numbered!"
  • "Is this where the line starts?"
  • "That idea just might be crazy enough... TO GET US ALL KILLED!!"
  • "I think my heart just stopped."
  • "In case you forgot, here's how things work: I order the food, you cook the food, and the customer gets the food. We do that, for forty years, and then we die."
  • "Squidward... TORTELLINI!?"
  • "Will I ever win?"
  • "He made me provide excellent service!"
  • "Hey, Frank."
  • "Well, he's handsome, I'll give him that!"
  • "Too bad that didn't kill me."
  • "Don't they know I'm busy spoiling myself?"
  • "Oh, puh-lease! I have no soul! *evil laugh*"
  • "SHUT YOUR HALF-WIT PIEHOLES!"
  • "HIS FAVORITE UNDERPANTS!"
  • "I call it Bold and Brash!"

Usage[edit]

Squidward was more prevalent in YouTube Poop before Viacom started cracking down heavily on the unauthorized usage of Spongebob-related material. However, as aforementioned, he has attained meme status via the "Does this look unsure to you?" image as well as through the aptly-titled "Squidward" video on YouTube.

The Fad[edit]

{{#ev:youtube|7Yl9e0XqCxc|320}}

"SQUIDWARD" was also the name of a 10-second video created by ChristopherCooler in late 2008. It consists of a screencapture of Squidward making a silly face from the episode "Prehibernation Week", which then has a variety of visual effects applied. This started a fad, with many people making their own copycat videos. The original has since been removed from Youtube, but reuploaded by other users.

The music used in these videos is "Gentle Breeze", a track from the Nintendo DS game Trauma Center: Under the Knife 2 composed by Shoji Meguro.

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