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Difference between revisions of "Willy Wonka"
From Chewiki Archive - YouChew:
1% Funny, 99% Hot Gas
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[[Image:17230.gif|thumb|right|Willy's dancing to a ritual for hopes to find some new children to have around.]] | [[Image:17230.gif|thumb|right|Willy's dancing to a ritual for hopes to find some new children to have around.]] | ||
| − | Willy Wonka is a crazy [[Bowser|pedophile]] that owns a candy [[Fuck|fac]]tory. This candy is alleged to be made out of little boys' [[Balls|nuts]] immersed into little girls' [[Cum|love juice]] but some say that it is a rare [[cock|choc]]olate found in Bosnia. Still, some others think say that his candy is [[shit|crap]] coated LSD tablets. | + | Willy Wonka, commonly known as Willy [[masturbation|Wanker]], is a crazy [[Bowser|pedophile]] that owns a candy [[Fuck|fac]]tory. This candy is alleged to be made out of little boys' [[Balls|nuts]] immersed into little girls' [[Cum|love juice]] but some say that it is a rare [[cock|choc]]olate found in Bosnia. Still, some others think say that his candy is [[shit|crap]] coated LSD tablets. |
== Likes == | == Likes == | ||
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*His father was a [[Dr. Rabbit|dentist]] that prohibited candy. In fact, he one time burned all of Willy's Halloween candy, the [[dick]]. | *His father was a [[Dr. Rabbit|dentist]] that prohibited candy. In fact, he one time burned all of Willy's Halloween candy, the [[dick]]. | ||
**After this, he ran away from his home, claiming to go to such chocolaty places as [[Germany|Bavaria]] and the like. | **After this, he ran away from his home, claiming to go to such chocolaty places as [[Germany|Bavaria]] and the like. | ||
| − | *After | + | *After realizing that he was growing old, he decided to give his chocolate factory to the winner out of the 5 golden tickets. |
| + | ==Wonkology== | ||
| + | Willy Wonka has his own religion, which was created on June 59th, 20XX. The rules of it are simple: Eat lots of candy, and hump 12 sheep a day. Because if its simplicity, and the popularity of sheep raping, the religion has many followers. | ||
| + | |||
| + | ==Notable Wonkologists== | ||
| + | *Charlie <s>Fucket</s> Bucket | ||
| + | *[[The Food Loving King]] | ||
| + | *[[You]] | ||
| + | *[[Link]] | ||
| + | *If I listed all the other notable people who were Wonkologists, the internet would probably explode. | ||
[[Category:Pedophiles]] | [[Category:Pedophiles]] | ||
[[Category:Business People]] | [[Category:Business People]] | ||
{{Stub}} | {{Stub}} | ||
Revision as of 11:01, 5 July 2012
This article is filed under Characters.
Willy Wonka, commonly known as Willy Wanker, is a crazy pedophile that owns a candy factory. This candy is alleged to be made out of little boys' nuts immersed into little girls' love juice but some say that it is a rare chocolate found in Bosnia. Still, some others think say that his candy is crap coated LSD tablets.
Likes
- Candy
- Taking people on psychotic boat rides.
- Making sure people get mindfucked.
- Yelling out "You Get Nothing!" and "You Lose!" to random people.
- Looking like a cross between Marilyn Manson and the Russian lady from Indiana Jones and the Temple of the Crystal Skull.
- Seeing MacArthur Park burning in the dark.
Dislikes
- Lex Luthor (Says that pedophilia is WRONG!!!!)
- Gum
- Sonic (Says that pedophilia is no-good, although it is very well known that Sonic himself is a pedophile.)
- Oompa Loompa Unions
- Rick Astley
- Not having the recipes to his candies ever again.
Trivia
- His chocolate factory was once just a standard chocolate factory, until it one day closed, only to reopen as one of the weirdest places on earth.
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Here's his (in)famous chocolate bar.
- His father was a dentist that prohibited candy. In fact, he one time burned all of Willy's Halloween candy, the dick.
- After this, he ran away from his home, claiming to go to such chocolaty places as Bavaria and the like.
- After realizing that he was growing old, he decided to give his chocolate factory to the winner out of the 5 golden tickets.
Wonkology
Willy Wonka has his own religion, which was created on June 59th, 20XX. The rules of it are simple: Eat lots of candy, and hump 12 sheep a day. Because if its simplicity, and the popularity of sheep raping, the religion has many followers.
Notable Wonkologists
- Charlie
FucketBucket - The Food Loving King
- You
- Link
- If I listed all the other notable people who were Wonkologists, the internet would probably explode.
