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Scout

From Chewiki Archive - YouChew: 1% Funny, 99% Hot Gas
Revision as of 15:24, 19 October 2009 by Catfish (talk | contribs) (→‎Trivia)
CharNice.jpg This article is filed under Characters.
Name: Scout
From: Team Fortress 2
Sex: Male
Occupation: Scout

The Scout originates from TF2 (Team Fortress 2) but is most likely to have been born in Brooklyn, New York City, New York.

He is capable of running at high speeds and also somehow is capable of jumping once in midair.

Appearances

The Scout is known to sing a number of tunes with the simple word "BONK", yet many don't know what it means, although, there are some suggestions:

  • An acronym that stands for something.
  • A secret code word only the known by the cast of TF2.
  • A word that he says due to autism or tourettes.

Relationships

He has been known to be an arch-rival of Heavy Weapons Guy for murder and theft of a sandwich. No one has caught him to this very day, and he is wanted for Armed Murder and Grand Theft Sandwich. There aren't many female scouts, so he is currently single.

Arsenal

Basic

  • Scattergun: A semi-automatic shotgun, deadly at close range.
  • Pistol: A...pistol, yeah. Nothing special here, move along.
  • Bat: His metal bat, signed with the forged signatures of Babe Ruth, Ken Griffey Jr. and Hank Aaron. Is caked in dried blood.

Update

  • Force-A-Nature: A hunting shotgun that knocks around everything like crazy. Replaces the Scattergun, but it forces the Scout to be less aggressive in his tactics, as it can only fire twice before needing a reload.
  • BONK! Energy Drink: Fucks with your atomic structure, making you invincible for a few seconds. Doesn't taste too good, either. Replaces the Pistol.
  • Sandman: A wooden bat that can stun opponents by swinging a ball at them before the Scout moves in and gets an easy kill. Aren't you supposed to walk the base when you get hit with the ball? Jesus, what has this sport become? Anyhow, replaces the Bat.

Catchphrases

  • EAT IT FATTY
  • BONK
  • BOINK
  • BOMP
  • YEAH WHY DON'T YOU COME OVER AND SAY THAT TO MY FACE, TOUGH GUY?
  • WHOOOOO!
  • YO, WASSUP?
  • LISTEN BUDDY, GRASS GROWS, BIRDS FLY, SUN SHINES, AND BRUDDA, I HURT PEOPLE.
  • I'M A FORCE OF NATURE.
  • AW, MAN, LOOK AT THAT, BEAUTIFUL.
  • I DUNNO WHERE TO START WITH YOU.
  • DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHO I AM?
  • BASICALLY, KIND OF A BIG DEAL.
  • IF YOU WHERE I WAS FROM, YOU'D BE FUCKIN' DEAD.
  • LOOK AT THIS. JUST CAVED IN YOUR SKULL, MY BAT'S STILL DRY. NO CLUMPS OF HAIR, NOTHING!
  • I. EAT. YOUR. SANDWICHES! I EAT 'EM UP!
  • NEED A DISPENSER HERE!!
  • I AM PANCAKES!
  • YOU ARE PANCAKES!
  • SANDWICHES SUCK!
  • DROP DEAD AND GIVE ME PANCAKES!
  • HOME FREAKIN' PANCAKES!
  • I. EAT. YOUR. PANCAKES! I EAT 'EM ALL!!
  • IF YOU EAT PANCAKES, I'LL THROW IN 20 SANDWICHES ABSOLUTELY FREE!!!
  • HE PUNCHED OUT ALL MY BLOOD!!

Likes

  • Sandwiches
  • Bonking
  • Bonking till his wrist hurts

Dislikes

Trivia

  • Is literally a bastard.
  • He likes to sing.
  • Is somewhat of a wigger.
  • Once Said "YEAH WHY DON'T YOU COME OVER AND SAY THAT TO MY DICK, TUFF GAL. BAWNK!"
  • Always wears a hat with a microphone and headset, as he works a part-time job delivering Pizza.
  • Rainbows make him cry. The only other person who can confirm this is the Spy.
  • May have been an advertiser before he became a person in Team Fortress 2.

Additional Links