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Hank Hill

From Chewiki Archive - YouChew: 1% Funny, 99% Hot Gas

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Name: Hank Hill
Appears In: King of The Hill
Sex: Male
Age: 50s
Nationality: American
Occupation(s): Salesman of Propane & Propane Accessories (Formerly the star of Arlen High School's football team.)
Played By: Mike Judge

CharNice.jpg This article is filed under Characters.

Hank Hill is the main character of the show King of the Hill. He is the assistant manager at Strickland Propane from Arlen, Texas, and should be approached with caution.

Family

  • Peggy Hill (Wife, a former substitute teacher that speaks terrible Spanish, yet somehow got three awards for it)
  • Bobby Hill (Son, who has little in common with him)
  • Cotton Hill (R.I.P.) (Father, a WWII veteran that hates Japs and his own son)
  • Tilly Hill (Mother, divorced Cotton; currently lives in Arizona)
  • Luanne Platter, his obnoxious niece who, thanks to an an abusive mother and criminal father, currently resides in Hank's house.
  • Has a brother named G.H., short for Good Hank.
  • As well as a Japanese half-brother that is just like him.
  • One of his cousins, Dusty, is the bass guitarist of ZZ Top.

{{#ev:youtube|F2cnuQNxROo|320}}

Likes

  • His family
  • His truck
  • Propane
    • Propane Accessories
  • Alamo Beer
  • American Football
    • The Dallas Cowboys
      • The Houston Texans (At one point at least. We're not sure of what he thinks of them as of today.)
  • His tools
  • His garage
  • Texas
  • George W. Bush
  • Saying that he's gonna kick your ass.
    • Kicking people's asses.
  • Standing on the sidewalk while drinking beer.
  • Buck Strickland (Hank is Buck's bitch.)
  • This new generation of music.
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The title card for the show that he is the star of.
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He got surgically attached to Bobby's right arm once.
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Hank Hill after discovering he was trapped inside of Pikachu's body. And seeing the picture that's on top of him.
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Gaston after learning about propane and propane accessories.

Dislikes

  • Bobby's interests
  • Soccer
  • That he was born in New York.
    • Especially the fact that he was born in the woman's restroom at the New York Yankees' Yankees Stadium (By that, I mean the one that the Yankees played for about 100 years, not the new one.).
  • Getting kicked in the balls by his son.
  • Losing in Punch-Out!! to his son.
  • Jackasses
  • Charcoal
  • Canadians

Quotes

  • That boy ain't right.
  • What's the point in arguing?!
  • I'm gonna kick your ass!
  • *idiotic laugh*
  • Now that's just asinine.
  • I must hide my nudity! (while in his underwear)
  • There better be a naked cheerleader under your bed! (when seeing Bobby with a dirty cheerleaders' uniform)
  • I've got the strangest feeling someone's gonna kick his ass.
  • I tell ya hwhat.
  • I sell propane and propane accessories.
  • Gotdangit Bobbeh!
  • BOGWAAAAAGH!!!
  • Let me tell ya, Bobby; there's nothing funny about semens. It's a medical disorder.
  • I like this new generation of music!
  • Yep!
  • We drove 2000 miles for this?

Trivia

  • He once accidentally sold cocaine and cocaine accessories. He didn't know what he was doing until his dog Ladybird sniffed it out.
  • One time, he was surgically attached to his son's left arm. How that happened and why that's even remotely possible is beyond us.
  • He has a very narrow urethra. So narrow, in fact, that his sperm marches out of it saying "Hut! Two, three, four- Hut! Two, three, four-"
  • The Pyro is Hank's favorite customer at Strickland Propane.
  • He likes seeing people learn more about and using propane and propane accessories, like this young, handsome fellow on the right.
  • Like all Texans, he generally disapproves of faggots and homosexuality.
  • He's gonna kick your ass!!
  • Ironically, he doesn't like this new generation of music.