King Harkinian

This article is filed under Characters.

King Harkinian is the noble ruler of the land of Hyrule. He loves talking about his boi, which has been proven to be Link. He also constantly wonders what's for dinner, and likes to aid his far-away friend, Duke Onkled. However, the duke gave the king over to the forces of Ganon, but when the king was rescued by Zelda, he made Duke Onkled scrub all the floors in Hyrule for his mercy.

Cultural Heritage: Sweden

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The King of Hyrule, talking about his boy and the number 4.

Areas of Expertise

• The King has extensive knowledge of what true warriors strive for, whether it be peace, dinner, or certain bodily fluids (Cum).
• The King also has a Wii, but has not released his friend code to the Hyrulian public. He is currently one of the worst Wario Ware players, and sucks at Mario Party 8.
• Expert at using a webcam, and tortures people who give him one star ratings on Youtube.
• It is romoured that he trained superbork in the ways of the Poop, but failed horribly.
• Vorhias managed to steal his dinner once. He barely made it out with his life.
• It is heavily suspected The King is a hard drinker. He usually drinks when talking about his Boy, and even laughs like a drunk frequently, possibly even flirting with Zelda. This may be due to his bottomless goblet which he holds most of the time.

Death

News of his death has not been released to the public yet, but it is a plausable fact. There are rumors going around that the king got so drunk, he succombed to alchohol poisoning shortly after his merry laugh with Zelda. He then died, and was replaced by another, less alchohol-addicted king. The current king has yet to have been questioned on whether or not he is the original king, but it is very likely that he isn't. The original King may or may not be released from the pit, however, Gregg the Grim Reaper is getting pissed at the King's death happening so frequently.

Likes

• Dinner
• Link
• Arguing with Zelda
• Torturing Duke Onkled
• Being Kidnapped by Ganon
• Saying "My Boy"
• His pet platypus
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  The King's pet platypus.
• Mudkips
• Laughing

Dislikes

• Not Having Dinner
• Ganon
• Snacks
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  Carmen seen taunting the King with a bag of Snacks that may contain Chips.
• Chips
• Froggo
• Jimmy & Timmy

Quotes

• MAH BOI!
• Four!
• I wonder what's for dinner?
• Aids
• After you scrub all the floors in hyrule, then we can talk about mercy! Take him away!
• HMMMM...how can Wii help?
• This piece is what all true warriors strive FOR!