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The Night B4 Christmas
The Night B4 Christmas is an inspirational, racially egalitarian 2003 Christmas special about an 18-year-old elf named Elvin who leaves the North Pole to become a rapper. It's very hard to find and has only been aired a few times on Cartoon Network.
Plot
A black elf named Elvin is hired by Santa Claus (who, for some reason, is also black) to assemble toys in Santa's workshop, but is fired three days later for tampering with the design of one of the toys by taking a drum that goes "a-rumpa-pum-pum" and inserting a sound chip that causes the drum to go "boom-shaka-boom-shaka-boom-shaka-bit." Like a spoiled brat, Elvin runs away from the North Pole in order to pursue his real dream: to become a rapper.
While in Portland, Oregon, Elvin's car is ran over by a diesel truck and has no mode of transportation. However, a slick, canine stranger named Pup Daddy, along with a lawn gnome named Shay Mr. Seamus McLarry McShawn, who both happen to be in the music business, offer Elvin a ride to California for a gig at a nightclub where Pup Daddy's girlfriend, Jel-O, works as a singer. The four give an outstanding performance that wows the audience and even attracts an Asian record producer named Mephistophous Beelzebarrabaska Saul. The four sign onto Mr. Saul's record deal believing that all their dreams have been realized.
Meanwhile, back at the North Pole, a strange, unnamed virus affects all the elves and Santa himself, causing Santa to announce via press conference that this year's Christmas is suspended until a cure is found.
In Mr. Saul's mansion, the rap quartet is worked to the ground by Mr. Saul and his spoiled brat-of-a-daughter Evilina. The four begin to question their decision to sign Mr. Saul's record deal but are quickly dissuaded by Saul's iron-solid contract, the fact that Saul's attack dogs are ready to pounce on them, and the fact that their first record has already made millions and reached #1 on the charts. Fully convinced that things have started looking up, the group decides to go on tour.
While on the tour bus, the four watch Santa's press conference on TV and begin to worry about this year's Christmas. Elvin, however, is still proud of his decision to leave the North Pole; that is, until Evilina bad-mouths Christmas to a point where Elvin realizes he has done wrong by not being at the North Pole to support Santa. He then escapes from the bus only to be quickly recaptured by Mr. Saul and his dogs.
The group is locked in a dungeon in Mr. Saul's house until the 26th. McShawn picks the lock with a hair pin and Jel-O distracts the dogs (and even Mr. Saul himself) with waffles and (meat)loaf she stole from a local restaurant. Elvin calls in Santa's sleigh and the group travels to the North Pole to get the workshop in order. However, Evilina had stowed away on the sleigh and begins to fight for the controls but is quickly restrained by Elvin.
Once the five arrive at the North Pole, Evilina's heart changes for the better upon looking inside Santa's workshop and agrees to nurse the elves and Santa back to health by making a powerful cure-all her deceased mother passed down. Elvin and the rest begin producing toys (some of the toy drums even using Elvin's design). Santa is cured and lifts the suspension on Christmas.
Once Santa finishes his rounds, the quartet and Evilina return to Mr. Saul's dungeon to confront Saul who was left to rot in jail with his attack dogs. Elvin gives Saul a drum that goes "a-rumpa-pum-pum", which warms Saul's heart and reminds him that this type of drum somehow inspired his entire music business. Back at the North Pole, Santa promotes Elvin to "Head Elf" in spite of the fact that his toys are too loud, and the movie ends with a good rap number.
History
The people on YouChew were trying to remember horrible Christmas specials when cantflyman brought up this "movie". A copy of it was found on Amazon and Whelt agreed to purchase it and rip it just for the community.
Cast
- Elvin - Aries Spears
- Mr. Saul - Steve Blum
- Pup Daddy - Charles Stewart (Chali 2na)
- Jel-O - Melique Berger
- Seamus McLarry McShawn - Steve Blum
First used in a poop by
- randomcontributor - What sane black person actually liked The Night B4 Christmas
