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Volvic Revive

From Chewiki Archive - YouChew: 1% Funny, 99% Hot Gas
Revision as of 13:20, 22 October 2007 by TheMoogleking (talk | contribs)

Volvic Revive is a drink that is filled with ginseng and guarana, and helps keep you ALEEEEEEEEERT! The only known source of Volvic Revive is George the Volcano.

Gossip

The drink has been banned in many countries for possesing the ability to raise the dead, which was the reason for the ressurection of Mama Luigi. In addition to this, Volvic Revive is the only known cure for Super AIDS (apart from a large, 100% pure dose of Uctions), the diabolical plague created by... you guessed it, Mama Luigi. Since Mama Luigi is on a crusade to infect everyone with the Super AIDS, Volvic Revive is a highly prized and sought-after substance. Unfortunatley, George the Volcano (the aforementioned only known source) is slightly mad at the best of times and may have you perform various tasks for him before he allows you to try some. Other fun facts about Volvic Revive:

  • Tyrannosaurus Alan uses it to enhance his pea-sized brain in order to commit horrific genocide on the Saber-Toothed Tigers.
  • Contrary to popular belief, George's birds do not like Volvic Revive. They instead prefer his more "twisted" volcano juices.
  • Since Mama Luigi was resurrected by Volvic Revive, it is possible that Anti-Revive may be his one weakness.