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Difference between revisions of "Willy Wonka"
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Revision as of 15:25, 29 September 2010
This article is filed under Characters.
Willy Wonka is a crazy pedophile that owns a candy factory. This candy is alleged to be made out of little boys' nuts immersed into little girls' love juice but some say that it is a rare chocolate found in Bosnia.
Likes
- Candy
- Taking people on psychotic boat rides.
- Making sure people get mindfucked.
- Yelling out "You Get Nothing!" and "You Lose!" to random people.
- Looking like a cross between Marilyn Manson and the Russian lady from Indiana Jones and the Temple of the Crystal Skull.
Dislikes
- Lex Luthor (Says that pedophilia is WRONG!!!!)
- Gum
- Sonic (Says that pedophilia is no-good, although it is very well known that Sonic himself is a pedophile.)
- Oompa Loompa Unions
- Rick Astley
Trivia
- His chocolate factory was once just a standard chocolate factory, until it one day closed, only to reopen as one of the weirdest places on earth.
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Here's his (in)famous chocolate bar.
- His father was a dentist that prohibited candy. In fact, he one time burned all of Willy's Halloween candy, the dick.
- After this, he ran away from his home, claiming to go to such chocolaty places as Bavaria and the like.
- After realising that he was growing old, he decided to give his chocolate factory to the winner out of the 5 golden tickets.
