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Difference between revisions of "Orson Welles"

From Chewiki Archive - YouChew: 1% Funny, 99% Hot Gas
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'''Orson Welles''' is a film actor, director and writer, most famous for being the writer and lead actor in ''Citizen Kane'', which is considered by some to be the greatest film of all time. He's a genius and he has a fetish for lots of things.
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'''Orson Welles''' is a film actor, director and writer, most famous for being the writer and lead actor in ''Citizen Kane'', considered by some to be the greatest film of all time. He's a genius who has a huge amount of sexual fetishes.
  
 
==Career==
 
==Career==
−
Orson Welles did a prank in the late 1930's via radio featuring alien attacks than made all of [[Hyrule]] commit suicide. He then made some movie about a sled or something like that. After ''Citizen Kane'', he went on appear in films like ''The Third Man'' (as villainous Harry Lime), ''Touch of Evil'', and can even be found in Tim Burton's ''Ed Wood'' (but he was played by an impersonator, as the real Welles was dead). His most recent advertising work was in a food commercial for frozen peas, which was shown on ''[[The Critic]]''. His final film role before his death was as [[Unicron]] in ''The [[Transformers]]: The Movie''.
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Orson Welles did a prank in the late 1930's via radio, claiming that aliens were attacking the world. This made all of [[Hyrule]] commit suicide before he revealed it as a joke. After he ran away from the angry mob, Welles made some movie about a sled or something like that. After ''Citizen Kane'', he went on appear in films like ''The Third Man'' (as villainous Harry Lime), ''Touch of Evil'', and appeared as a character in Tim Burton's ''Ed Wood''. His most recent advertising work was in commercials for frozen peas, wine, fish sticks, and a "living will", which he only did for the money. His final film role before his death was as [[Unicron]] in ''The [[Transformers]]: The Movie''.
  
 
==Likes==
 
==Likes==
 
*Himself
 
*Himself
 
*The attention ''Citizen Kane'' has received
 
*The attention ''Citizen Kane'' has received
 +
*Rosebud
 
*Rosebud Frozen Peas
 
*Rosebud Frozen Peas
 
*[[Mario|Brotto Bros.]] [[BOOZE|Wine]]
 
*[[Mario|Brotto Bros.]] [[BOOZE|Wine]]
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*Jay Sherman's daughter
 
*Jay Sherman's daughter
 
*French fries
 
*French fries
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*[[Spy|A French fuck]]
 
 
*[[PENIS|Peaness]]
 
*[[PENIS|Peaness]]
 
*[[Die|Death]]
 
*[[Die|Death]]
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*Wedges & [[BOOZE|Mead]]
 
*Wedges & [[BOOZE|Mead]]
 
*Making some epic introductions to things.
 
*Making some epic introductions to things.
−
*French fries stuck in his [[penis]].
+
*French fries stuck in his beard.
  
 
==Dislikes==
 
==Dislikes==
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*The Living Will
 
*The Living Will
 
*Normal wills written on paper.
 
*Normal wills written on paper.
 +
*Line readings
 
*[[Transformers]] (Which he claims is about "[[Megatron|big, evil toys]] that attack [[Optimus Prime|other toys]]".)
 
*[[Transformers]] (Which he claims is about "[[Megatron|big, evil toys]] that attack [[Optimus Prime|other toys]]".)
  
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==Quotes==
 
==Quotes==
 
*"[[Hell]]o, I'm Orson Welles. What follows is a terrifying journey into the world of [[Magic Drugs|magic]], mystery..."
 
*"[[Hell]]o, I'm Orson Welles. What follows is a terrifying journey into the world of [[Magic Drugs|magic]], mystery..."
−
*"What? Look, I don't need to do this. I've got a fishstick commercial in an hour! ...Oh, what the Hell, I need the [[money]]."
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*"What? Look, I don't need to do this; I've got a fishstick commercial in an hour! ...Oh, what the Hell, I need the [[money]]."
 
*"What follows is a terrifying journey into the world of probate, beneficiaries, and ''goblins!''"
 
*"What follows is a terrifying journey into the world of probate, beneficiaries, and ''goblins!''"
 
*"Fine, fine; [[no]] goblins."
 
*"Fine, fine; [[no]] goblins."
 
*"I give you... ''The Living Will.'' *insert evil laughter here*"
 
*"I give you... ''The Living Will.'' *insert evil laughter here*"
 
*"And remember, there is no fishstick like Mrs. Pells."
 
*"And remember, there is no fishstick like Mrs. Pells."
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*"I know; that was just a declaration of [[love]]. ...[[Yes]]! ..Oh yes! They're even better raw!"
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*"I know, that was just a declaration of [[love]]. ...[[Yes]]! Oh yes! They're even better ''raw''!"
 
*"Rosebud..."
 
*"Rosebud..."
−
*"They're even better when [[you]]'re [[die|dead]]!"
 
 
*"[[Yes]], Rosebud Frozen Peas. Full of [[cunt|count]]ry [[good]]ness and green [[PENIS|peaness]]."
 
*"[[Yes]], Rosebud Frozen Peas. Full of [[cunt|count]]ry [[good]]ness and green [[PENIS|peaness]]."
−
*"Wait, that's terrible. I quit!"
+
*"Wait, that's terrible. I quit! Just a handful for the road."
 
*"Oh, what luck! There's a French fry stuck in my beard! (chomp, chomp)"
 
*"Oh, what luck! There's a French fry stuck in my beard! (chomp, chomp)"
 
*"Oh, what luck. There's a French fry stuck in my [[penis]]!"
 
*"Oh, what luck. There's a French fry stuck in my [[penis]]!"
−
*"[[Cunt]]s are even better when [[you]]'re [[die|dead]], but [[I]]'ve got a dead [[dick]]!!"
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*"I have gone onto a better place: a place filled with Mrs. Pell's Fish Sticks."
−
*"Oh Hell, I gotta pee!"
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*"They're even better when [[you]]'re [[die|dead]]!"
−
*"And now my penis is sensibly priced at a dollar an hour."
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*"A rich, full-bodied wine sensibly priced at a dollar an hour. And now, for a magic trick, I will make this jug disappear."
 
*"I like my [[dick]]. No wait, I love my dick! [[Yes|Do you like my penis?]]"
 
*"I like my [[dick]]. No wait, I love my dick! [[Yes|Do you like my penis?]]"
 
*"You know what I did this morning? I played the voice of [[Unicron|a toy.]] Some [[Transformers|terrible robot toys from Japan that changed from one thing to another.]] The [[Japan]]ese have funded a full-length animated cartoon about the doings of these toys, which is all bad outer-space stuff. I play [[Unicron|a planet]]. I menace somebody called [[Galvatron|Something-or-other]]. Then I'm destroyed. My plan to destroy [[Ultra Magnus|Whoever-it-is]] is thwarted and I tear myself apart on the screen."
 
*"You know what I did this morning? I played the voice of [[Unicron|a toy.]] Some [[Transformers|terrible robot toys from Japan that changed from one thing to another.]] The [[Japan]]ese have funded a full-length animated cartoon about the doings of these toys, which is all bad outer-space stuff. I play [[Unicron|a planet]]. I menace somebody called [[Galvatron|Something-or-other]]. Then I'm destroyed. My plan to destroy [[Ultra Magnus|Whoever-it-is]] is thwarted and I tear myself apart on the screen."
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==Trivia==
 
==Trivia==
 
*[[The Amazing Atheist]] listed him as the third best movie voices of all time, right behind Clint Eastwood and a tie between Morgan Freeman and [[Darth Vader|James Earl Jones.]]
 
*[[The Amazing Atheist]] listed him as the third best movie voices of all time, right behind Clint Eastwood and a tie between Morgan Freeman and [[Darth Vader|James Earl Jones.]]
 +
*Wally Burr killed him. Just ask Michael Bell!
 
[[Category:Dead]]
 
[[Category:Dead]]
 
[[Category:Elderly Characters]]
 
[[Category:Elderly Characters]]

Revision as of 17:40, 24 March 2010

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Orson Welles is a film actor, director and writer, most famous for being the writer and lead actor in Citizen Kane, considered by some to be the greatest film of all time. He's a genius who has a huge amount of sexual fetishes.

Career

Orson Welles did a prank in the late 1930's via radio, claiming that aliens were attacking the world. This made all of Hyrule commit suicide before he revealed it as a joke. After he ran away from the angry mob, Welles made some movie about a sled or something like that. After Citizen Kane, he went on appear in films like The Third Man (as villainous Harry Lime), Touch of Evil, and appeared as a character in Tim Burton's Ed Wood. His most recent advertising work was in commercials for frozen peas, wine, fish sticks, and a "living will", which he only did for the money. His final film role before his death was as Unicron in The Transformers: The Movie.

Likes

  • Himself
  • The attention Citizen Kane has received
  • Rosebud
  • Rosebud Frozen Peas
  • Brotto Bros. Wine
  • Mrs. Pell's Fishsticks...
    • When they are raw.
    • When he is dead.
    • When they are raw and he is dead.
    • Actually, just them in general.
  • Jay Sherman's daughter
  • French fries
  • Peaness
  • Death
  • Hell
  • Magic
  • Making jugs appear or disappear.
  • Making magic jugs disappear.
  • Wedges & Mead
  • Making some epic introductions to things.
  • French fries stuck in his beard.

Dislikes

Appears In Poops By

  • SSBBexpert
  • CarlomagnoXVI
  • heavymetalcat1
  • NS2

Quotes

  • "Hello, I'm Orson Welles. What follows is a terrifying journey into the world of magic, mystery..."
  • "What? Look, I don't need to do this; I've got a fishstick commercial in an hour! ...Oh, what the Hell, I need the money."
  • "What follows is a terrifying journey into the world of probate, beneficiaries, and goblins!"
  • "Fine, fine; no goblins."
  • "I give you... The Living Will. *insert evil laughter here*"
  • "And remember, there is no fishstick like Mrs. Pells."
  • "I know, that was just a declaration of love. ...Yes! Oh yes! They're even better raw!"
  • "Rosebud..."
  • "Yes, Rosebud Frozen Peas. Full of country goodness and green peaness."
  • "Wait, that's terrible. I quit! Just a handful for the road."
  • "Oh, what luck! There's a French fry stuck in my beard! (chomp, chomp)"
  • "Oh, what luck. There's a French fry stuck in my penis!"
  • "I have gone onto a better place: a place filled with Mrs. Pell's Fish Sticks."
  • "They're even better when you're dead!"
  • "A rich, full-bodied wine sensibly priced at a dollar an hour. And now, for a magic trick, I will make this jug disappear."
  • "I like my dick. No wait, I love my dick! Do you like my penis?"
  • "You know what I did this morning? I played the voice of a toy. Some terrible robot toys from Japan that changed from one thing to another. The Japanese have funded a full-length animated cartoon about the doings of these toys, which is all bad outer-space stuff. I play a planet. I menace somebody called Something-or-other. Then I'm destroyed. My plan to destroy Whoever-it-is is thwarted and I tear myself apart on the screen."

Trivia

  • The Amazing Atheist listed him as the third best movie voices of all time, right behind Clint Eastwood and a tie between Morgan Freeman and James Earl Jones.
  • Wally Burr killed him. Just ask Michael Bell!
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