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Rarity

From Chewiki Archive - YouChew: 1% Funny, 99% Hot Gas
Revision as of 08:47, 17 August 2013 by Mariosonic10974 (talk | contribs)
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Rarity is Bitch Pony

Name: Rarity
Appears In: My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic
Sex: Female
Nationality: Equestrian
Occupation(s): Fashion Designer & Shopkeeper
Played By: Tabitha St. Germain & Kazumi Evans

Description

The biggest bitch in Ponyville, Rarity cares about every single detail regarding her looks and popularity. As typical of bitches, she complains about every single god damn thing that happens to her to the point where she once escaped a kidnapping by WHINING ABOUT IT! Besides being a complaining, whining bitch, she also has an obsession with gems, diamonds, and jewels which is a real problem for Spike (who has a crush on Rarity) as he eats an obscene amount of them daily. Even though she's a bitch, she gives things away and does favors for other ponies sometimes, so I guess she can be likeable at times to provide a moral or something.

Then again, maybe some ponies/people have a thing for bitches.

Likes

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Rarity's initial reaction to her Chewiki page
  • Her looks
  • Popularity
  • Clothes
  • Hats
  • Shoes
  • Gems/Diamonds/Jewels/Rupees
  • Spike
  • Opalesence
  • Sweetie Belle
  • Tabloids
  • Whining
  • Crying
  • Spas
  • Cleanliness

Dislikes

Rarity describes an average Creepypasta
  • Mud (unless its imported)
  • Dirtiness
  • Ugliness
  • Rudeness
  • Mules
  • Prince Blueblood
  • Diamond Dogs
  • THE WORST POSSIBLE THING
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The second time she did this, those wings burned

Quotes

  • "It's the horrifying story of the messy inconsiderate ghost, who irritated everypony within a hundred miles! OoooooOOOwwwwOOOoo..."
  • "I'm so pathetic!"
  • "What are you supposed to pack when you go into exile? Are you supposed to pack warm?"
  • "I am not whining, I am complaining, do you want to hear whining? This is whining. Oh, the harness is too tight, it's going to chafe, can't you loosen it? Ugh! It hurts and it's so nasty, why didn't you clean it first? It's gonna leave a stain and the wagon's getting heavy. Why do I have to pull it?"
  • "I know where you live!"
  • "MINE!!!"
  • "Out of all the worst things that could happen, this is the! Worst! Possible! Thing!"
  • "I didn't know you could burn juice."
  • "We are apple pie!"
  • "Nice is an understatement, I look fabulous!"
  • "How rude"
  • "I'LL DESTROY HER!"
  • "Fine! I'm guilty! I WEAR FALSE EYELASHES!"
  • "Please! Everybody knows Mexicans aren't REAL people!"

Trivia

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Rarity prepares to cry about something nobody gives a shit about
  • She represents the Element of Generosity (and Bitchiness).
    • She also represents the Helement of Money
  • Spike has a crush on her and she is aware of it.
  • She loves fashion, yet is usually seen without clothes.
  • She took a bite of the cake...
  • Her sister proved to her that it is possible to burn juice.
  • She makes her dresses via a sweat shop full of mexicans.
  • She flew once, but her wings burned up in the sun and she (should have) died.
  • She once dragged a boulder around because she thought it was a giant diamond named Tom.
  • She once escaped being kidnapped from a pack of dogs (who were looking for a female dog to rape) by whining.
  • She can't stand things being messy or dirty.
  • She cut off her tail with a dragon scale to create a makeshift moustache.
  • She tried dating one of Celestia's nephews once. He turned out to be a huge dick.
  • She called a nerd handsome and muscular to get some asparagus. It probably wasn't the first time.
  • She has a cat named Opalesence who is even more bitchy than her.