From Chewiki Archive - YouChew: 1% Funny, 99% Hot Gas
I know you, you're that guy.
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A demonic ruler of several worlds. His powers are recorded here:
- Kills numerous people with a stare
- Has the ability to hump the air, not unlike Mohammed Abdul.
- His crotch took over Japan and possessed it's civilians; which explains the nature of Hard Gay.
- If he ever offers you his hat, it means you are worthy for one of his thrones of power. You'll end up dying somehow though.
- Has died once, but came back.
- Ear rape.
- Ate Saturn for brunch.
- You can't hurry love, but Phil Collins can.
- Has spontaneously combusted a total of five times.
- He challenges Mohammed Abdul to an air-humping contest.
- Is friends with Hulk Hogan's BROTHERRRRR
- He hates retarded kids.
- Is a resident of Vice City.
- He has 52 balls.
- He can feel it coming in the air tonight, oh Lord.
- His girfriend is Sue Sussudio.
- He has danced into the ligggokay, enough with the Phil Collins jokes.
His only weakness is his sub-par ability to make music on his own.
- He has stroke or something like that that's ruined his hands. :(
- He was originally in the progressive rock band Genesis, and took over Peter Gabriel as the lead singer when he left.
- Wrote the soundtrack to the critically-acclaimed YouTube Poop: The Movie.