Notice: We are aware that many of the Chewiki’s images are still broken. We promise: we will try our best to fix it, but we don't guarantee that the fix will be trivial.
Editing Willy Wonka
From Chewiki Archive - YouChew:
1% Funny, 99% Hot Gas
Warning: You are not logged in. Your IP address will be publicly visible if you make any edits. If you log in or create an account, your edits will be attributed to your username, along with other benefits.
The edit can be undone. Please check the comparison below to verify that this is what you want to do, and then save the changes below to finish undoing the edit.
| Latest revision | Your text | ||
| Line 1: | Line 1: | ||
| − | + | {{char}} | |
| + | {{dirty}} | ||
| + | [[Image:17230.gif|thumb|right|Willy's dancing to a ritual for hopes to find some new children to have around.]] | ||
| + | Willy Wonka, commonly known as Willy [[masturbation|Wanker]], is a crazy [[Bowser|pedophile]] that owns a candy [[Fuck|fac]]tory. This candy is alleged to be made out of little boys' [[Balls|nuts]] immersed into little girls' [[Cum|love juice]] but some say that it is a rare [[cock|choc]]olate found in Bosnia. Still, some others think say that his candy is [[shit|crap]] coated LSD tablets. | ||
| + | |||
| + | == Likes == | ||
| + | *Candy | ||
| + | *Taking people on psychotic boat rides. | ||
| + | *Making sure people get mind[[fuck]]ed. | ||
| + | *Yelling out ''"[[You]] Get Nothing!"'' and ''"[[Link: Faces of Evil|You Lose!]]"'' to random people. | ||
| + | *Looking like a cross between [[Marilyn Manson]] and [[Nostalgia Critic|the Russian lady from Indiana Jones and the Temple of the Crystal Skull.]] | ||
| + | *Seeing MacArthur Park burning in the dark. | ||
| + | *Sarcastically making you tell him more about random things (such as [[American Football|Tony Romo]] or the [[Macintosh|iPhone 5]]) | ||
| + | |||
| + | == Dislikes == | ||
| + | *[[Lex Luthor]] (Says that pedophilia is [[WRONG]]!!!!) | ||
| + | *[[Cum|Gum]] | ||
| + | *[[Sonic]] (Says that pedophilia is no-good, although it is very well known that Sonic himself is a pedophile.) | ||
| + | *Oompa Loompa Unions | ||
| + | *[[Rick Roll|Rick Astley]] | ||
| + | *Not having the recipes to his candies ever again. | ||
| + | |||
| + | ==Trivia== | ||
| + | *His chocolate factory was once just a standard chocolate factory, until it one day closed, only to reopen as one of the weirdest places on earth. | ||
| + | [[Image:Scam.jpg|thumb|right|Here's his (in)famous [[Chocolate Bars|chocolate bar.]]]] | ||
| + | *His father was a [[Dr. Rabbit|dentist]] that prohibited candy. In fact, he one time burned all of Willy's Halloween candy, the [[dick]]. | ||
| + | **After this, he ran away from his home, claiming to go to such chocolaty places as [[Germany|Bavaria]] and the like. | ||
| + | *After realizing that he was growing old, he decided to give his chocolate factory to the winner out of the 5 golden tickets. | ||
| + | |||
| + | ==Quotes== | ||
| + | *"I'm '''''EXTRAORDINARILY''''' busy, sir." | ||
| + | *"[[Lex Luthor|WRONG]], SIR, [[Lex Luthor|WRONG]]!" | ||
| + | *"...SO YOU GET.. NOTHING!! YOU LOSE!! GOOD DAY, SIR!!" | ||
| + | *"You can suck [[Penis|'em]], and suck [[Dick|'em]], and suck [[Cock|'em]] and they'll never get smaller, never!" | ||
| + | *"Strawberries taste like strawberries, ''schnoz'' berries taste like schnoz berries!" | ||
| + | *"Are the fires of [[Hell]] a-glowing?" | ||
| + | *"Don't touch that squirrel's nuts!" | ||
| + | |||
| + | ==Wonkology== | ||
| + | Willy Wonka has his own religion, which was created on June 59th, 20XX. The rules of it are simple: Eat lots of candy, and hump 12 sheep a day. Because if its simplicity, and the popularity of sheep raping, the religion has many followers. | ||
| + | |||
| + | ==Notable Wonkologists== | ||
| + | *Charlie <s>Fucket</s> Bucket | ||
| + | *[[The Food Loving King]] | ||
| + | *[[You]] | ||
| + | *[[Link]] | ||
| + | *If I listed all the other notable people who were Wonkologists, the internet would probably explode. | ||
| + | [[Category:Pedophiles]] | ||
| + | [[Category:Business People]] | ||
| + | {{Stub}} | ||
