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Editing Heavy Weapons Guy
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{{char}} | {{char}} | ||
{{CharBox | {{CharBox | ||
| − | |name=Heavy Weapons Guy | + | |name=Heavy Weapons Guy |
|image=BULLET.JPG | |image=BULLET.JPG | ||
|sex=Male | |sex=Male | ||
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|nationality=Russian | |nationality=Russian | ||
|occupation=Heavy weapons guy (OHMIGAWD, NO WAI!!) | |occupation=Heavy weapons guy (OHMIGAWD, NO WAI!!) | ||
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===Update=== | ===Update=== | ||
| − | *'''Natascha''': Though not as powerful as Sasha, it slows down his opponents, which could make them easier kills | + | *'''Natascha''': Though not as powerful as Sasha, it slows down his opponents, which could make them easier kills. Replaces ''Sasha.'' |
*'''[[Sandvich]]:''' The delicious deli product with a Slavic accent! Used for healing himself and [[Pizza Party|general dickery in matches]]. Replaces the ''Shotgun''. | *'''[[Sandvich]]:''' The delicious deli product with a Slavic accent! Used for healing himself and [[Pizza Party|general dickery in matches]]. Replaces the ''Shotgun''. | ||
*'''Killing Gloves of Boxing (KGB)''': Not to be mistaken for the Soviet Secret Service's initials, these gloves give the Heavy's ''Fists'' an extra "kick". | *'''Killing Gloves of Boxing (KGB)''': Not to be mistaken for the Soviet Secret Service's initials, these gloves give the Heavy's ''Fists'' an extra "kick". | ||
*'''Conscientious Objector''': You are now a conscientious objector to being DEAD, thanks to this protest sign with which you can put on ANY IMAGE and I mean ANY IMAGE (Provided you have the tool)! Replaces the ''Fists''. | *'''Conscientious Objector''': You are now a conscientious objector to being DEAD, thanks to this protest sign with which you can put on ANY IMAGE and I mean ANY IMAGE (Provided you have the tool)! Replaces the ''Fists''. | ||
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===Community=== | ===Community=== | ||
*'''Dalokohs Bar''': A chocolate bar that increases the Heavy's max health...I'll just stick with the Sandvich. | *'''Dalokohs Bar''': A chocolate bar that increases the Heavy's max health...I'll just stick with the Sandvich. | ||
| − | *'''Gloves of Running Urgently (GRU)''': When wearing these special boxing gloves, the Heavy runs faster (ironic I know) but does less damage and | + | *'''Gloves of Running Urgently (GRU)''': When wearing these special boxing gloves, the Heavy runs faster (ironic I know) but does less damage and his health is drained every second. Also known as the GRU and are NOT to be confused with the Russian international military intelligence directorate of the same name. |
*'''Brass Beast''': The Heavy becomes a walking sentry with this. It might make him move slow but the bullets deal more damage. | *'''Brass Beast''': The Heavy becomes a walking sentry with this. It might make him move slow but the bullets deal more damage. | ||
*'''Buffalo Steak Sandvich''': Who needs bread, or a gun? Real men eat steak and fight with their hands! Plus getting badly hurt themselves if they get hit. | *'''Buffalo Steak Sandvich''': Who needs bread, or a gun? Real men eat steak and fight with their hands! Plus getting badly hurt themselves if they get hit. | ||
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*'''Eviction Notice''': When you're wearing sharp knuckledusters, you get that confidence to swing your fists faster into the faces of jerkasses. | *'''Eviction Notice''': When you're wearing sharp knuckledusters, you get that confidence to swing your fists faster into the faces of jerkasses. | ||
*'''Holiday Punch''': Feeling jolly? Make your enemies burst into uncontrollable fits of laughter as you punch 'em from behind with these gloves while the rest of the team (or you with your minigun) does the honours. What a humiliating way to die. | *'''Holiday Punch''': Feeling jolly? Make your enemies burst into uncontrollable fits of laughter as you punch 'em from behind with these gloves while the rest of the team (or you with your minigun) does the honours. What a humiliating way to die. | ||
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| − | === | + | ===Promotion=== |
*'''Iron Curtain''': Canonically the Heavy's first Minigun from his earlier days of Berlin Wall defence, before he used Sasha. Forget approaching with caution and find another way around him. Replaces ''Sasha''. | *'''Iron Curtain''': Canonically the Heavy's first Minigun from his earlier days of Berlin Wall defence, before he used Sasha. Forget approaching with caution and find another way around him. Replaces ''Sasha''. | ||
*'''Fishcake''': A...fishcake...wrapped...functions the same as the Dalokohs Bar...Move along. Should I also mention that the fish ingredient is artificial? Replaces the ''Shotgun''. | *'''Fishcake''': A...fishcake...wrapped...functions the same as the Dalokohs Bar...Move along. Should I also mention that the fish ingredient is artificial? Replaces the ''Shotgun''. | ||
*'''Apoco-Fists''': Said to have been worn by Mikhail Gorbachev himself, these diamond-studded boxing gloves can shatter bone and break enemies into bloody chunks. Bet you wish your boxing gloves could be that manly. Replaces the ''Fists''. | *'''Apoco-Fists''': Said to have been worn by Mikhail Gorbachev himself, these diamond-studded boxing gloves can shatter bone and break enemies into bloody chunks. Bet you wish your boxing gloves could be that manly. Replaces the ''Fists''. | ||
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===Event=== | ===Event=== | ||
*'''Saxxy''': Only a select few received this coveted statuette of good old [[Saxton Hale|Saxton]] said to have been carved by King Midas/Sauron specially for the Saxxy Awards replay contest. Now MORE people are turning their enemies into gold and holding bragging rights! Gives the ''Fists'' something to hold to FINALLY use as a proper melee weapon (But [[Saxton Hale]] won't agree for sure) and NOT some random food item! | *'''Saxxy''': Only a select few received this coveted statuette of good old [[Saxton Hale|Saxton]] said to have been carved by King Midas/Sauron specially for the Saxxy Awards replay contest. Now MORE people are turning their enemies into gold and holding bragging rights! Gives the ''Fists'' something to hold to FINALLY use as a proper melee weapon (But [[Saxton Hale]] won't agree for sure) and NOT some random food item! | ||
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Special Note: When the Heavy wields the Brass Beast, the Buffalo Steak Sandvich and the Warrior's Spirit together, crits don't hurt as much. Never fear the crit rocket again! | Special Note: When the Heavy wields the Brass Beast, the Buffalo Steak Sandvich and the Warrior's Spirit together, crits don't hurt as much. Never fear the crit rocket again! | ||
==Relationships== | ==Relationships== | ||
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Heavy is in mad love with his weapons, especially Sasha, though he occasionally cheats on her by switching to Natascha for dealing with those pesky [[Scout]]s. | Heavy is in mad love with his weapons, especially Sasha, though he occasionally cheats on her by switching to Natascha for dealing with those pesky [[Scout]]s. | ||
| − | He is best buddies of the [[Medic]], though many believe their friendship goes beyond that | + | He is best buddies of the [[Medic]], though many believe their friendship goes beyond that. |
His worst enemy is the [[Scout]] who always tries to steal his sandwiches for himself, the pig! | His worst enemy is the [[Scout]] who always tries to steal his sandwiches for himself, the pig! | ||
Also, he recently be[[came]] best Soviet friends with [[Zangief]] and [[Soda Popinski]]. | Also, he recently be[[came]] best Soviet friends with [[Zangief]] and [[Soda Popinski]]. | ||
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==Quotes== | ==Quotes== | ||
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*Once served in the Red Army, which is where he obtained his ushanka. | *Once served in the Red Army, which is where he obtained his ushanka. | ||
*Being [[Falcon Punch|punched]] by his fists is similar to being hit by the following: [[Pyro|an Axe]], [[Soldier|a Shovel]], [[Demoman|a Bottle (broken or not)]], [[Medic|A Bonesaw]], [[Engineer|a Wrench]], [[Sniper|a Kukri]], and a [[Falcon Punch]]. | *Being [[Falcon Punch|punched]] by his fists is similar to being hit by the following: [[Pyro|an Axe]], [[Soldier|a Shovel]], [[Demoman|a Bottle (broken or not)]], [[Medic|A Bonesaw]], [[Engineer|a Wrench]], [[Sniper|a Kukri]], and a [[Falcon Punch]]. | ||
| − | *It is believed that Heavy actually scared someone with the sandvich by putting an evil grin on it. | + | *It is believed that Heavy actually scared [[retard|someone]] with the sandvich by putting an evil grin on it. |
*Was once shocked to see the [[Scout]] be[[cum|come]] a [[Dry Bones|Boo]], who proceeded to chase him afterwards. | *Was once shocked to see the [[Scout]] be[[cum|come]] a [[Dry Bones|Boo]], who proceeded to chase him afterwards. | ||
*Despite his lack of intelligence, he has limited reality-warping powers. By simply saying something such as "'''Character''' is '''item'''", whatever he said will come true. All we have to do is hope he doesn't say, "''[[No|Heavy is naked]]!''" | *Despite his lack of intelligence, he has limited reality-warping powers. By simply saying something such as "'''Character''' is '''item'''", whatever he said will come true. All we have to do is hope he doesn't say, "''[[No|Heavy is naked]]!''" | ||
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*One time, he ended up being a guinea pig like [[Soda Popinski]] for Russian scientists. However, unlike [[Soda Popinski]], he was given special strength increasing [[sandvich]]es, which [[no]]t only gave him [[Superman|super strength]], but also made him radiate in a purple color. | *One time, he ended up being a guinea pig like [[Soda Popinski]] for Russian scientists. However, unlike [[Soda Popinski]], he was given special strength increasing [[sandvich]]es, which [[no]]t only gave him [[Superman|super strength]], but also made him radiate in a purple color. | ||
**Also, he once fought [[Little Mac]] due to the fact that he was pretending to be [[Soda Popinski]]. He surprisingly ended up winning that fight. | **Also, he once fought [[Little Mac]] due to the fact that he was pretending to be [[Soda Popinski]]. He surprisingly ended up winning that fight. | ||
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*He was once hypnotized by [[Pickle Surprise]] to say "ham". | *He was once hypnotized by [[Pickle Surprise]] to say "ham". | ||
*Enjoys playing poker with [[Sam & Max|Max]], Tycho, and [[Strong Bad]]. | *Enjoys playing poker with [[Sam & Max|Max]], Tycho, and [[Strong Bad]]. | ||
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==See Also== | ==See Also== | ||
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*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XqIRX4aXTP8 First Heavy Weapons Guy poop ever.] | *[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XqIRX4aXTP8 First Heavy Weapons Guy poop ever.] | ||
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7VPYQm1o5BY Heavy Weapons Guy and his trademark laugh.] | *[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7VPYQm1o5BY Heavy Weapons Guy and his trademark laugh.] | ||
| + | {{DEFAULTSORT:Heavy Weapons Guy}} | ||
[[Category:Team Fortress 2]] | [[Category:Team Fortress 2]] | ||
| + | [[Category:Retarded Characters]] | ||
[[Category:Video Game Characters]] | [[Category:Video Game Characters]] | ||
[[Category:Fat Characters]] | [[Category:Fat Characters]] | ||
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[[Category:Characters - Russian]] | [[Category:Characters - Russian]] | ||
[[Category:Internet Memes]] | [[Category:Internet Memes]] | ||
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[[Category:Europeans]] | [[Category:Europeans]] | ||
[[Category:Asians]] | [[Category:Asians]] | ||
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