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Editing Hank Hill
From Chewiki Archive - YouChew:
1% Funny, 99% Hot Gas
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==Family== | ==Family== | ||
*Peggy Hill (Wife, a former substitute teacher that speaks terrible Spanish, yet somehow got [[three]] awards for it). Known to exercise very annoying behaviors/speech/facial expressions. | *Peggy Hill (Wife, a former substitute teacher that speaks terrible Spanish, yet somehow got [[three]] awards for it). Known to exercise very annoying behaviors/speech/facial expressions. | ||
− | *[[Bobby Hill]] (Son, who has little in common with him | + | *[[Bobby Hill]] (Son, who has little in common with him) |
*Cotton Hill (R.I.P.) (Father, a WWII veteran that hates [[Japanese|Japs]] and his own son) | *Cotton Hill (R.I.P.) (Father, a WWII veteran that hates [[Japanese|Japs]] and his own son) | ||
*Tilly Hill (Mother, divorced Cotton; currently lives in [[Law For Kids|Arizona]]) | *Tilly Hill (Mother, divorced Cotton; currently lives in [[Law For Kids|Arizona]]) | ||
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[[Image:Dres.gif|frame|right|Hank has gathered everyone he can for the murder of zombies worldwide!]] | [[Image:Dres.gif|frame|right|Hank has gathered everyone he can for the murder of zombies worldwide!]] | ||
[[Image:Ilikethisnewgenerationofmusic.jpg|thumb|right|[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sgA_UBHFASQ Hank is mesmerized by the current music that's blasting through his headphones.]]] | [[Image:Ilikethisnewgenerationofmusic.jpg|thumb|right|[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sgA_UBHFASQ Hank is mesmerized by the current music that's blasting through his headphones.]]] | ||
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==Likes== | ==Likes== | ||
*His family | *His family | ||
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**The Dallas Cowboys | **The Dallas Cowboys | ||
***The Houston [[Texas|Texans]] (At one point at least. We're [[no]]t sure of what he thinks of them as of today.) | ***The Houston [[Texas|Texans]] (At one point at least. We're [[no]]t sure of what he thinks of them as of today.) | ||
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*His tools | *His tools | ||
*His garage | *His garage | ||
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*His lawn | *His lawn | ||
*His house | *His house | ||
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*Dale Earnhardt (R.I.P.) (It's unknown if he likes his son Dale Earnhardt Jr. or not.) | *Dale Earnhardt (R.I.P.) (It's unknown if he likes his son Dale Earnhardt Jr. or not.) | ||
*"BWWWAAAAUUUUHHHHHH!!" | *"BWWWAAAAUUUUHHHHHH!!" | ||
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==Quotes== | ==Quotes== | ||
− | * | + | *That [[Bobby Hill|boy]] [[wrong|ain't right.]] |
− | * | + | *What's the point in arguing?! |
− | * | + | *I'm gonna kick your [[ass]]! |
*''*idiotic laugh*'' | *''*idiotic laugh*'' | ||
− | * | + | *Now that's just asinine. |
− | * | + | *I must hide my ''nudity!'' (while in his underwear) |
− | * | + | *There better be a naked cheerleader under [[you]]r bed! (when seeing Bobby with a dirty cheerleaders' uniform) |
− | * | + | *I've got the strangest feeling someone's gonna kick his [[ass]]. |
− | * | + | *I tell ya hwhat. |
− | * | + | *I sell propane and propane accessories. |
− | * | + | *Gotdangit [[Bobbeh]]! |
− | + | *BOGWAAAAAGH!!! | |
− | * | + | *Let me tell ya, Bobby; there's nothing funny about [[cum|semens.]] It's a medical disorder. |
− | * | + | *I like this new generation of music! |
− | * | + | *Son of a BWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!!! |
− | * | + | *Uh, Peggy, I can see your [[boobs|what-nots]]. |
− | * | + | *Yep! |
− | * | + | *Shut up, Dale... |
− | * | + | *Why would anyone want to lick a stamp that has [[Bill Clinton]] on it? |
− | * | + | *We drove 2,000 miles for this? |
− | * | + | *That better not be what I think it is... and I think it's a [[Phoenix Wright|good lawyer]]! [[Retard|Is it a]] [[Detroit]]? |
− | * | + | *Bobby, I've got propane in my urethra! |
− | * | + | *Why would you go waving your [[dick]] around in public? |
− | * | + | *Why would you go fucking your [[bitch]]es in public? |
− | * | ||
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==Trivia== | ==Trivia== | ||
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*He once accidentally sold [[Dr. Rockso|cocaine and cocaine accessories.]] He didn't k[[no]]w what he was doing until his dog Lady[[birds|bird]] sniffed it out. | *He once accidentally sold [[Dr. Rockso|cocaine and cocaine accessories.]] He didn't k[[no]]w what he was doing until his dog Lady[[birds|bird]] sniffed it out. | ||
*One time, he was surgically attached to [[Bobby Hill|his son]]'s left arm. How that happened and why that's even remotely possible is beyond us. | *One time, he was surgically attached to [[Bobby Hill|his son]]'s left arm. How that happened and why that's even remotely possible is beyond us. | ||
− | *He has a very narrow urethra. So narrow, in fact, that his sperm marches out of it saying "Hut! Two, three, four- | + | *He has a very narrow urethra. So narrow, in fact, that his sperm marches out of it saying "Hut! Two, three, four- Hut! Two, three, four-" |
*The [[Pyro]] is Hank's favorite customer at Strickland Propane. | *The [[Pyro]] is Hank's favorite customer at Strickland Propane. | ||
*He likes seeing people learn more about and using propane and propane accessories, like this young, handsome fellow on the right. | *He likes seeing people learn more about and using propane and propane accessories, like this young, handsome fellow on the right. | ||
+ | *Like all Texans, he generally disapproves of [[faggot]]s and homosexuality. | ||
*His family and friends once drove all the way to [[The Simpsons|Springfield]] to see their team play [[American Football|football]] against [[Bart Simpson|Bart]]'s team. Hank was bitter they went 2000 miles to witness Arlen be defeated. | *His family and friends once drove all the way to [[The Simpsons|Springfield]] to see their team play [[American Football|football]] against [[Bart Simpson|Bart]]'s team. Hank was bitter they went 2000 miles to witness Arlen be defeated. | ||
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*He spends much of his spare time making prank calls to stores such as Home Depot, asking where the hardware department is. | *He spends much of his spare time making prank calls to stores such as Home Depot, asking where the hardware department is. | ||
*He's gonna kick [[you]]r [[ass]]!! | *He's gonna kick [[you]]r [[ass]]!! | ||
*Ironically, he doesn't like this new generation of music. | *Ironically, he doesn't like this new generation of music. | ||
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[[Image:King-Of-The-Hill-king-of-the-hill-613231 512 384.jpg|frame|left|[[Yes|Yep]].]] | [[Image:King-Of-The-Hill-king-of-the-hill-613231 512 384.jpg|frame|left|[[Yes|Yep]].]] | ||
[[Category:Athletes]] | [[Category:Athletes]] | ||
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[[Category:Southerners]] | [[Category:Southerners]] | ||
[[Category:Business People]] | [[Category:Business People]] | ||
[[Category:Spokespeople]] | [[Category:Spokespeople]] | ||
[[Category:Characters - Appears in The Simpsons]] | [[Category:Characters - Appears in The Simpsons]] |