Editing Ed

{{char}}
{{CharBox
|name=Ed Horace
|image=Key_to_my_ed_19-1-.jpg‎
|shows=Ed, Edd n' Eddy
|sex=Male
|age=13-15
|occupation=Eddy's <s>slave</s> friend, comic book collector, full-time idiot
|nationality=American
|cast=Matt Hill
}}
[[image:NGHHHHH.PNG‎|thumb|Ed's either [[no|having one of those days]] or [[yes|is on red crystal]].]]
[[Image:Nlajiv.gif|frame|right|Ed shows off his mad skills in "Hanger Spinning" to [[Edd]] and [[Eddy]].]]
[[image:1777.jpg|thumb|Ed commenting on Eddy's [[Penis|carpet.]]]]
[[Image:Sillyboy.jpg|thumb|300px|right|This is the most recent thing that Ed's learned of. Honest.]]
[[Image:10000000043.jpg|thumb|Half-eaten pretzel-bagel beats rock?]]
{{vid|wnPzEOSoK7Q}}
Ed is one of "The Three Eds". He is known as the brawn in the Eds' group. He was never a smart fellow, as is evidenced by archival footage played in one of the episodes. He is not related to either [[Edd]], [[Eddy]], or [[Sarah]]. She was adopted. That will explain the yelling. According to DNA tests, her real parents are [[Robotnik]] and [[Mama Luigi]]. Recently, Ed was served a sexual harassment lawsuit for attempting to give out [[DICKIE|hot dickings]] to the Kankers while looking for a spoon.

Cultural Heritage: Polish-American

==Skills==
*Ed can play a violin, but his violin playing sounds more like either Cliff Burton's bass (on a good day) or nails on a chalkboard (on a bad day). The episode that had his violin showed him on a bad day because he had to practice or [[Sarah]] would bust his [[balls|head]].
*He can generate a charge of static electricity big enough to blow up a house. Zappity zap zap!
*He can be a woodpecker, but he tends to peck dirt rather than wood.
*He can lift a freakin' ''house'', and has been able to do that since he was, like, three. Now that's hardcore.
*He can kill wood while listing to J-Rock.
*He also is the ultimate champion in "Hanger Spinning", in which people move their heads around and make sure their hangers on their ears move in that same circular formation without them falling off their ears.
*Ed can also fly for a short time and do a high jump.
*He can turn a swimming pool into a pool of gravy using just one box of gravy mix. That's almost as big a miracle as Jesus feeding all those people with some bread and fish.

==Likes==
*Buttered [[Toast]]
*Gravy
*Chickens
*More Chickens
*Even More Chickens
*The Chicken from [[Cow and Chicken]]
*Chicks Galore
*[[Eddy]] (It is rumored by some that Ed has a sexual wanting for him. This has been proven true/false by [[yaoi]] addicted [[retard|fangirls]] and [[SushieBoy]].)
*[[Edd|Double D]] (The same rumor as above applies.)
*Pudding Skin
*[[Eddy|Eddy's]] [[MY LAMP|lava Lamp]]
*Sports
*[[Fat Mario]]
*Did we mention he likes chickens?

==Dislikes==
*[[May]] Kanker
*Bugs
*Violins
*Soap
*Over radiated [[Mashed Potatoes]]
*Unbuttered [[Toast]]

==Trivia==
*Enjoys having people 'whack' him.
*Enjoys cookie dough.
*Screams almost as much as [[Rolf]].
*Once glued a block of wood to Johnny's foot.
*Is a slave to his clay model Baron 'o Beefdip.
*Is ''not'' smart now.
*Is the bringer of bacon.
*LOVES Chickens.
*Has an addiction to gravy and buttered [[toast]].
*Can swallow a video camera with relative ease and eat a mattress in three mouthfuls.
*Makes crushing playgrounds seem such a breeze.
*May move fast...
*And jump stupidly high...
*But this Ed's ONE HELL OF A GUY! HUH!
*Was a moose once.
*Once glued his [[PENIS|dick]] to a table.
*Oh, and his middle name is Horace.
*Is also a subscriber to Chicks Galore. (And [[no|yes]], it's indeed a porno magazine disguised as an animal book of some baby chickens hatching from [[eggs]].)
*Is distantly related to [["Weird Al" Yankovic|Weird Ed]] from Maniac Mansion.
*His group's "The Three Eds" only rivals in comedy are the Three Stooges.
*He has the power to remove bottles on his hand with sticky tape. How he can do that remains to be seen.
*One time, his outline somehow escaped him. He traveled through all different types of universes before he tricked the outline with some free jawbreakers.
*Has recently learned that he's alive.
*Is the driver of the military's G.U.N. truck.

==Quotes==
*"Is sitting naked in a wagon cool?"
*"Nice [[Penis|carpet]], [[Eddy]]."
*"I love canoes."
*"I AM CAN OPENER MAN!"
*"[[Masturbation|Whack]] [[me]]! [[Masturbation|Whack]] [[me]]! [[Masturbation|Whack]] [[me]]! [[Masturbation|Whack]] [[me]]!"
*"My dad has a shovel!"
*"[[No]]t to mention a duck!"
*"[[No|Am I smart now?]]"
*"COOKIE DOUGH!!"
*"Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, I am such a lucky elf!"
*"[[You]] guys are gonna make my turtle cry!"
*"[[Sex|Touch]] [[me]] again, and I will ''SQUASH'' [[you]]!"
*"'''''BIG TROUBLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!'''''"
*"[[YOU]] TORMENT ME!"
*"I'm a woodpecker, 'cept with dirt."
*"Why don't birds just take a bus south for the winter?"
*"Hello, light."
*"MAN THE HELMS! DIVE! DIVE!"
*"(using puppet) Oh dear, [[I]] fell!"
*"''EXTREME CLOSEUP!''"
*"Slide on the soap... slide on the soap... slide on the soap... slide on the soap... *ten minutes later* slide on the soap..."
*"GUTTER BALL!"
*"I am the Claw, and the Claw wishes to fly, too!"
*"[[I]] think [[I]] just thunk."
*"My fantasy [[cum|come]] true! [[yes|I AM BUTTERED TOAST!!!]]"
*"'''I AM ED!'''"
*"[[Shaq|FOUL!!!]] [[American Football|OFFSIDE!!]] [[Bear Hugger|PEN-AL-TIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!]]"
*"Dig-a Hole! Dig-a Hole!"
*"RUN AWAY!!"
*"ZAPPITY-''ZAP''-ZAP!"
*"[[YOU]] BET [[YOU]]R SWEET [[Ass|BIPPY]] I DID!"
*"For [[I]], Ed, can remove the bottle with ''sticky tape.''"
*"''[[You know what they say|YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY]], DOUBLE D!''"

{{DEFAULTSORT:Ed}}
[[Category: Characters - Appears in Ed, Edd n' Eddy]]
[[Category: Characters - Polish]]
[[Category: Retarded Characters]]
[[Category: Porno Watchers/Lovers]]
[[Category: Bisexual Characters]]
[[Category: Powerful Characters]]